Dogs are often sacred (and spoiled) members of any family...

With their own memory-foam beds, winter sweaters and paw-boots, baskets of toys and organic treats, it's safe to say a lot of people have a deep connection with their family dogs. If you don't make a separate Instagram account just to post daily updates of your dog, are you even a dog owner? Who else would caption photos of your pet in your pet's voice? The fans need updates!

When people get puppies they often forget that they're signing up to spend at least a decade of their lives with that pet, which means a lot of life changes can occur. Girlfriends who turn into wives who turn into the mother of your children might not approve of your dog in the same way you do, and then...is it time for a divorce? While that might seem hilariously extreme, a recent Reddit user with a strong case thinks differently. When he consulted the internet's moral compass (AKA Reddit's "Am I the As*hole?") about his wife's opinion on how "dangerous" dogs are with children, people were ready to help.

AITA (Am I the As*hole?) for giving my wife an ultimatum about getting a dog?

I had a dog when my wife and I got married. I loved her, she was my buddy. When my wife got pregnant, she became increasingly paranoid that the dog would be a danger to the baby. She brought up rehoming, and I refused. She was an "aggressive breed", but she was trained. One day, she called me crying at work that the dog ran away and she couldn't run after her. I believed her. I looked for that dog for weeks. I finally just accepted it because we had to go to the hospital to welcome our child and there were just other pressing concerns.

It's been 5 years since then, and we now have three children. I've wanted to get a new dog, but the kids take a lot of energy and time. My wife has always had a new excuse not to get another dog. I found out recently that my dog didn't run away, my wife and her father took the dog to the pound while I was at work because her parents agreed with her about the dog being "dangerous".

I'm FURIOUS. She was MY dog, my BABY. She wasn't dangerous. I would never have agreed to that. She probably never got adopted. I'm honestly mad enough to consider a separation if not for the kids and practical reasons. I've told her that the only way to make it up even a little bit is for us to get a dog. She ultimately doesn't want a dog at all, and complained that she would have to do too much with it. I'm not planning to let up on this one this time.

Of course, people were quick to weigh in on this one:

Get a dog after your divorce dude. - snarkingintheusa

You said you looked for the dog for weeks and I’m sure you were distraught while you searched for her. Your Wife continued to watch you in your pain, knowing she caused it, and did nothing. She also disrespected you as a parent! She made a decision that something wasn’t acceptable for your child- to be around this dog- and you disagreed, but she decided she knew better than you. Also, eff your in-laws. - tinydictatorsmom

Honestly, it sounds like your marriage has serious issues and you should see a couple's counselor.

Your wife is okay with lying to you to get her way... that's bigger than just this dog issue - NominativeSingular

But, I don’t think it’s wise to get a dog while in that relationship. How would your wife treat and care for the dog? Would she find a way for this one to disappear too?

Not only did she send your dog to the pound, and lie about it for YEARS, she also appears not to have any remorse for having done so. I would seriously consider a divorce.

Trade in your wife for a new dog. - waradmiral99

What she did is borderline psychotic. Knowingly brought your dog to a place where she may have been put down then lied about it for 5 years?

If she was comfortable enough to do that, there may be a lot more she's hiding from you. I highly recommend figuring out what your future looks like with her, as your 3 kids may have to suffer through similar control tactics while growing up. - Silverback-Guerilla

I can definitely see why your wife might want to get rid of your dog. Being pregnant and having a baby changes you. Your priorities change. You’ll do anything for the safety of your baby. ANYTHING.

Your wife is not wrong for having the feelings and concerns she did/does, HOWEVER she certainly was wrong for how she handled them. Lying to you was wrong. Going behind your back was wrong.

But I don’t think this gives you the green light to bring another dog into the home. Everyone, especially the parents, should be on board with bringing a new pet into the family.

I’d suggest going to marriage counseling, not seeking revenge. Plus, it isn’t fair to the dog. Your wife will hate it, and rightly so. Why put a dog through that?

Your wife is a jerk for how she handled the situation and lied to you. You’re a jerk for not taking her concerns and feelings seriously (both during pregnancy and now), and you’d continue to be a jerk for getting a dog out of revenge. - GothamBatgirl

So, there you have it!

While most people agreed that his wife was completely in the wrong for getting rid of his beloved dog behind his back, it also wouldn't be in the best interest of the family (or the dog) to get a new dog right now. The general consensus is actually that he should consider leaving his wife. Anyone who is capable of keeping a lie that severe for so long is probably capable of much worse. Looks like someone else could be "dangerous" around children in the future. Good luck everyone!

People who work on naval ships, and spend months at sea witness moments of immense beauty and terror.

There are few feelings that rival the awe and vulnerability of being out in the middle of the ocean, privy to the whims of nature and whoever else recently tread the water. While most days fishing or running a ship are relatively mundane, the brief yet memorable scary moments are hard to shake.

In a popular Reddit thread, deep sea fishermen, ocean freighter workers, and naval personnel shared some of their most bizarre moments from the job.

1. From Pagan-za:

I've been on large container ships up and down the coast here. Whenever you're in the middle of a storm it's quite exciting. Its hard to describe the sea in the middle of a storm. The swells get huge and rough. When lightning hits the sea you see it light up a huge area and start to froth.

The scariest though is being on the bridge in a trough between two swells and seeing the water rising up on either side of you like a wall.

2. From closetocelot:

One of the strangest/most beautiful things to see, is when there are dolphins swimming round the ship at night and there is bio-luminescence. If there's no light pollution or moon light, all you can see is ghostly trails of the light in the water and hear something breathing in the water below you.

3. From californiaboy77:

On the Pacific side of South America, I believe we were off the coast of Peru or Chile, can't quite remember...I was working night shift so I was out on the flight deck to watch the sun come up. Strangest damn thing I've ever seen...the ocean was dead calm like a lake. Seriously, no ripples, no waves, just dead calm. Like you found a small pond up in the mountains that was completely undisturbed. The moon was bright in the sky still as the sun had not yet begun to rise but there was still a lot of light from it. The moon made it feel all the more eerie. And besides the noise from the ship, it was completely silent. One of the weirdest experiences I've ever felt.

4. From Dogebase:

I was caught in an electrical storm while fishing. This was in Lake Ontario, running 8 foot graphite rods on down riggers. I was standing on the deck watching the rods, and I noticed blue sparks start jumping from rod to rod. A split second later, lightning struck directly behind the boat. That was probably the loudest natural sound I will ever hear in my life.

5. From Friendlyvoices:

This story is terrifying and awesome at the same time. I enjoy sailing and like to take long trips on my uncle's boat. We usually try to sail along the East or West coast of the US, but one year he was stationed in Japan, and I got the opportunity to travel to Japan. (Great place to visit).

I was sailing by the coast of Okinawa, when a thunder storm started up in the middle of the night. Strangely, the ocean was completely still and the weather was giving us a wonderful light show. Lightning would strike the water and light up everything around us. Suddenly, lighting struck near our boat and we saw the most incredible sight. Jellyfish. Jellyfish everywhere. There's were not the usual jellyfish that you see around the US, these things were HUGE. The lightning would strike the water, and the jellyfish would light up. The ocean literally looked like it glowed purple and red that night.

6. From Your_Monarch:

When I was younger, my dad and I went deep sea fishing all the time. The creepiest thing that ever happened to me was when we decided to do a little more surface fishing further out on the open ocean, rather than fish for grouper and whatnot. So I'm sitting with my feet off the edge of the boat, and my dad hooks a fish. It seems pretty big, based on the way it was pulling, so I look over to see if he needs help.

Then something slowly brushes my legs. I looked down and there was a 4-5' barracuda brushing against my legs. I froze, and seconds later it shot off. When my dad felt the line go slack, he started reeling in faster. The barracuda had bitten off most of the fish. It was only a mouth on a hook, really. Pretty creepy.

7. From Vigorious:

I am in the US Coast Guard, and I recently was assigned to a ship. I was going through our log books to look up something and noticed that on the bridge a "Unknown Blue Light" was observed beneath the waters surface the night before. This intrigued me so I started looking through more of the logs. Apparently every 2-3 weeks they enter lights of varying colors in places you would not expect.

Usually white, red or green lights are on the horizon, or in the sky (ships and aircraft). But they seem to report colored lights under the water, sometimes moving around, sometimes stationary. Lights in the sky moving at extreme speeds then immediately stopping or disappearing altogether. Sometimes lights are visible to the naked eye but when we try to look at it with FLIR or Night vision they are undetectable.

I dunno, not that creepy but was pretty interesting to me.

8. From tarzan322:

During my time in the Navy, we once transited through the Bermuda Triangle at night. Being the Navy, there was plenty of people playing on the whole eeriness of our location as it was. But at one point I stepped outside to have a look. It is typically quite dark on a Navy ship in the middle of the ocean at night, so it was quite a shock to see the water actually glowing green where we were. It looked a lot like we were sailing through an ocean full of the chemicals you find in light sticks. It's pretty wild to see, especially in the triangle. I found out later that it was most likely bioluminescence from plankton in the water.

9. From FFG36:

When I was stationed on the USS Underwood and we were in the Persian Gulf, the water was as flat as glass. We were just steaming along (no land anywhere in sight) and we pass a sheep bobbing in the water. There wasn't a ship to be seen, but here was a sheep in the ocean. We all had a laugh.

10. From Mikey4021:

Merchant seaman here. I have traveled world wide with over 50000 miles under my belt having crossed the Atlantic, Indian and pacific oceans multiple times.

The thing I have seen a few times that really creeped me out were whilst on watch at night. And on several occasions witnessed meteorites similar if not bigger to the ones caught on dash cams in Russia. Also seemingly close to the ship. Even audible to the human ear if outside on the bridge wings.

Spectacular sights but also kinda terrifying.

11. From SeriousMichael:

US navy submarine sonar tech. I've heard some strange sounding fish that people can usually identify or at least have a colloquial name for (such as the boing fish).

Then I've a lot of weird, unnatural, disturbing sounding fish that nobody can identify. Fish that sound like an opera singer singing while puking into a paper shredder.

We also had a guy doing some maintenance on our sonar array while we were underway. I heard him hit his head and shout "oh god damn it mother f*cker!" Not creepy just hilarious.

12. From WickedMystic:

This was maybe 10 years ago, and I was sailing with my family, moving a sailboat from the Connecticut shore to Boston, and this happened on an extremely foggy day. I also remember the day being pretty windless as well so we were just motoring along instead of sailing.

Now, the general procedure for sailing in such thick fog is to use radar and foghorns to try to prevent any collisions from happening. At some point we started hearing huge, loud horn blasts, just repeating from somewhere to our right in the fog. It seemed normal enough, someone signaling their position to anyone in the vicinity, then after maybe 15-20 minutes of sailing and listening to these horn blasts, we eventually came upon what was making them. Maybe 100 feet from our boat, a huge ass submarine appeared, and looked like it's just sitting still. The weird thing was the suddenness of it's appearance.

Maybe not the creepiest thing in this thread, but an enormous black shape appearing out of the fog at sea was pretty creepy to me at the time.

13. From bardwick:

Probably asking about ocean related crazy stuff but was on an aircraft carrier. No flight operations, I was the junior guy that had to sit around and watch the radar/cnn/basic instinct on continuous loop...

I noticed a blip which was no bid deal. Either commercial or a French carrier (Foch?) had something go on, however the next blip showed it had traveled quite a distance. at 7 seconds per sweep, it was running over 2,000 mph. My first thought was that it was an SR-71 type bad ass but my radar was for ATC, that thing would have to be pretty low for me to see it (50,000' tops). The next return verified the speed. It was the fourth one that qualifies as "creepy". The aircraft had turned 90 degrees. Was headed south, then turned east. We had planes that could run that fast, but nothing that could turn that fast (that I'm aware of, early 90's). Another sweep and it was gone.

Buddy of mine in the CDC (combat direction center) saw the same thing. Both of us were pretty excited about it. Reported it up and they blew it off.

So, I don't know about cow mutilation or alien abductions, things like that, but I was (am) absolutely convinced I saw a UFO.

I remember flipping over to the "plot page" on the CCTV. We were at 41 41n 17 36 e.

14. From lordofthenopants:

Not so much seen, but definitely heard. I'm in the Navy and about 12 years ago I was standing watch in a Submarine engine room. We were underway, can't for the life of me remember where to, from, or just making circles. It was the mid watch and I sat down to catch up on some logs. That's when I heard a woman's voice and felt the hairs on my neck stand straight up.

(No women on subs then) I got up, looked around and found the other watches shooting the shit or doing their daily tasks. I thought maybe I had dozed off and dreamt it. I sat back down and heard it again, and it sounded like it was coming from outside the hatch I was sitting under. I said "fuck this shit" out loud and went to just be around the other guys on watch. I still get chills thinking about it, even now.

15. From _TheBgrey:

My Dad spent years at sea and has many stories from his time on tanker ships as an engineer. One time the ship was being slowed down by something they couldn't explain, mechanically fine, turns out they had a large dead whale wrapped around the bow of the ship slowing them down.

But the creepiest story was a simple one, the crew was shark fishing off the bank of a smaller tanker ship, basically attaching meat chunks to hooks and throwing them off the back to trawl in the ocean (South east Asia/Australia area). My dad for fun made up this large (steel alloy? Described it as being incredibly durable) hook to use. They attach a large chunk of meat too it and throw it off the back.

A while later they haul it back in, only to find the meat is gone and the hook is bent completely straight. There was nothing it could have snagged on in the deep ocean as the boat was driving through. My dad and the crew were sufficiently unnerved, to think that something large down there could bend a large hook like that.

16. From Veeoh:

I was in the Royal Navy and was at sea during Hurricane Andrew(?) - was the most exciting thing ever. Waves so big they went over the bridge wings. Awesome stuff.

Remember seeing gulls trying to stay in the air and going down behind the waves out of sight they were that large.

It was too rough to feel seasick - I just snuck on to the bridge and pretended I was on watch and just watched in awe.

17. From fanatiqual:

While in the navy I was an engineer who worked in one of our ships two engine rooms. I was tasked with cleaning out tubes inside a heat exchanger that took in sea water to condense steam. The entire tube system and the end cap was filled to the brim with mud and some sort of sea worms. It looked like it was one giant living brown mass and I immediately threw up upon smelling and seeing it. We were in the Persian gulf and the water was relatively shallow and warm so lots of creepy crawlies in our sea water pumps and heat exchangers.

18. From nosafeharbor:

Former submarine sonarman here. No windows, so it falls outside the creepy things I've seen requisite. More of a creepy thing we heard.

I was stationed on the west coast. Whenever we would transit near a particular Californian city, within a specific area, we would hear over the headphones the something that started off sounding like a woman screaming and ended sounding like bullfrogs on a hot summer night. None of the sonar techs up through our chief knew what to make of it.

We chalked it up to just being a Merfrog and carried on.

19. From Finn-McCools:

A friend of mine (known as 'Damo') was an avid fisherman and he and his dad used to go out sea fishing whenever they could. A few years ago he told me this story and it creeped the hell of me so this seems like an appropriate place to tell it!

Damo and his dad were on the 2nd night of a trip deep sea fishing and they decided to get some sleep in the early evening so they could go for whatever fish they were after at around 1 am (the best time to get this fish apparently).

Anyway they only had a small-ish boat but the weather was extremely pleasant and the sea was calm to the point of stillness so they figured it would be a great nights fishing for them.
Around 12:30 am they started to set their gear up and, as they were on the starboard side getting bait ready, they heard a loud splash on the port side. As there was almost no swell they figured it was either a large fish or some gear had somehow fallen in so they went over to have a look.

Floating face up in the water only a few feet from the side of the boat was a young woman (they reckoned she couldn't have been more than about 30 at the most). She showed absolutely no signs of decomposition/bloating and there was nothing tangled in her hair (all of which would normally suggest she had been in the water for some time). She was wearing a simple white skirt and a blue colored strappy top, both of which were 'clean' and apparently looked barely wet (again, all indicating she had only just gone in the water).

She showed no signs of 'damage' like having been beaten or attacked and her eyes and mouth were shut. Damo said she looked totally peaceful and like she was simply asleep and just floating on her back in the water.

They were both totally freaked out by the whole thing but reacting more to the need to make sure she was ok (instead of just standing there trying to work out where she came from) they tried to wake her up (shouting to her etc) and they threw a line to her hoping they may catch her enough to pull he back in.

She showed no signs of movement and the splashing around they were making with the rope served only to let her body drift further away from the boat. When she was a few meters away, Damo ran off to grab a fishing rod, hoping they could pull her in that way and his dad ran to the cabin to try and call a coastguard for help. When Damo got back to the side, she had vanished.

He frantically searched around and splashed into the water with the rod (thinking she had bobbed under water or even drifted under the boat somehow) but the body had vanished.
Eventually his dad, figuring they couldn't just leave a potential dead/unconscious body floating in the water, jumped in and swam over to where she had last been, hoping he may find her under the surface but they couldn't find anything.

They did eventually drive the boat around in a good half km circle but they never saw the body again. The coast guard did come out (and obviously Damo and his dad were kind of interrogated to make sure they hadn't murdered/dumped the body) but nothing came of it all.

The freakiest thing about it all was that the boat was thoroughly checked before they had set out fishing the day before so they could say with certainty that there had been no woman on board when they set off (either a dead body or a stowaway/homeless woman). The apparently 'fresh' state of the body kind of removed the possibility that she had been in the water a while and that they just found the body and they were far enough out from land (and nowhere near any other boats) that her appearance there was just totally unexplainable, as was the way the body just disappeared.

Damo and his dad hadn't been gone more than 20 seconds from the side of the boat but in that time the body just vanished.

They were both really shaken by the whole thing and were most terrified by the fact that her appearance was pre-ceeded by the heavy splash in the water, to them suggesting the body had only just entered the water from their own boat.

They tell the story now as a kind of "you won't believe what happened to us once" type thing, but it shook them badly and neither has been back to the same fishing spot since.
Sorry it's a long one but it's so creepy it felt like it deserved to be explained fully!

TL;DR - A friend and his dad were alone fishing, heard a splash, found an unharmed and otherwise' fresh' body just off the side of their boat. Body then vanished when they tried to get it. Sh*t scared for years afterwards.

20. From Persica:

I'm an officer in the Australian Merchant Navy, the creepiest thing for me is on a daily basis I have to go into the Bosun's store (where all the tools and equipment are kept) where a guy I sailed with hanged himself. I was on study leave when he did it and I had seen him a few months prior and he was all smiles. His wife had decided to leave him and take the kids, a friend of his was killed on the job some years ago by accident and he blamed himself, (which he had no control over, it was largely to do with bad luck and safety procedure when working with a crane).

This guy who I like hanged himself and every time I go into the Bosun's store I remember him and feel weird/ creeped out.

This story has everything: infidelity, sterilizing horseback riding injuries, passive-aggressive parenting...it's a fascinating crisis for everybody who isn't the kid.

Using the blunt screenname NotAdoptingHerBaby, a guy is asking "Am I The A**hole?" whether or not he's a jerk for—you guessed it—not adopting his wife's baby.

The little boy's backstory is scandalous. The Not The Father wrote:

I (27M) used to have a wonderful relationship with the woman I love (26F). However, five years ago, she got drunk, had a one night stand, and got pregnant from it. Can't be mine, I can't have kids due to a horseback riding injury when I was a teen. Didn't get the guys name, no way to find him, so he's out of the picture. My wife decided to keep it, and we almost went through a divorce, but couples therapy made us decide to try again. We're still in therapy now, since I still have a hard time trusting her.

So, she had her son. We talked a lot about it, and I made it clear that I'm ok taking on a step-parent role, but I wasnt willing to fully be his dad. I wouldnt adopt him, but I would help raise him and get him off to college. My wife agreed to this, became a stay at home mom so she could take care of him with help from her parents, and I've pretty much been the fun uncle like guy. I play with him, buy him games, try my best to not resent him (and I am in therapy for this), and mostly just stay out of the way of my wife's parenting. He even calles me "Uncle," instead of dad. He knows I'm not his father, and is just happy to play video games with me and chill.

While acting as a "step-parent" might have been good in theory, it is not working out in practice.

Well, recently, my wife has started talking about me adopting him, something I'm not willing to do. I made it clear that if anything happened, he would go live with her parents, and I'd send child support. If they couldn't take him, I wouldnt put him in foster care or anything, but I also wasnt willing to take on the responsibility of being his father when I'm not. I'm happy being an Uncle to another man's kid, since thats what life threw at me.

The wife is no longer satisfied parenting with an "uncle."

This has greatly upset her, and she's trying to find a way to force me into adopting him. She's even been manipulating the poor kid, saying he should start calling me dad instead of uncle like he has his entire life, which is upsetting and confusing the poor boy. This situation has worked for the last 5 years, and I dont know why she's trying to change something that isnt broken, or force me into a role I told her years ago I wasnt willing to accept, which she was fine with until just recently.

This has greatly upset her, and she's trying to find a way to force me into adopting him. She's even been manipulating the poor kid, saying he should start calling me dad instead of uncle like he has his entire life, which is upsetting and confusing the poor boy. This situation has worked for the last 5 years, and I dont know why she's trying to change something that isnt broken, or force me into a role I told her years ago I wasnt willing to accept, which she was fine with until just recently.

The Reddit Jury awarded this story with the seldom used label "Everyone Sucks Here," ruling that the writer is an a**hole and his wife is too.

"Everything about this is pretty terrible. Her cheating. You purposefully distancing yourself from the child, who is not yours through no fault of his own, not to mention you being the only father figure he's ever know," ShmamBo88 commented.

"Dad's don't need to be blood. You all sound like assholes. Except the little one obviously, who I just feel so sorry for. Sort your shit out for his sake."

Others agreed, going as far as saying that if he was not willing to co-parent with his wife, then he shouldn't stay in the relationship.

"It's not fair to the child. Either he needs to be all in, or out," anchovie_macncheese added.

The husband took the comments to heart, announcing in an update to the original post that he is..........*drumroll please*........LEAVING HIS WIFE!

He explained:

Update - after reading everything, I told my wife I was leaving and pursuing that divorce. I think I've been ready to do so for a while, but just needed the push. This has led to a complete melt down, but I stayed firm, packed everything up, and moved in with my brother across town. I have already contact the landlord to tell him I would pay for 2 more months rent. After that, everything needs to be switched to her.

Talking to my lawyer, it was verified that, due to the process I went through after the birth to establish I wasnt the father, I would not have to pay child support or alimony, which is something very rare and uncommon anyway where I live. He's already working on the paperwork. No idea when it'll all happen, but once it does I'll cut full contact.

My wife has tried to call and text multiple times, but I've refused to talk. I'll post another update when I know more.

Reddit has the power. Maybe next they can encourage the president to leave his job?

"Everything good, everything magical happens between the months of June and August."

-Jenny Han

Summertime and the livin' is easy... and sweaty. Whether you love or hate the hot steamy months of summer, you will definitely crack up at these hot memes.

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"Every moment is a fresh beginning."

– T.S Eliot

Every moment is a fresh beginning and a new opportunity to laugh. These memes bring the funny right to you. How convenient is that? If only everything in life could be so easy and fun.

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In a capitalist society that claims the "customer is always right," it takes pretty extreme incidents for a cusomer to be banned from coming back—ever. But it does happen! Someone asked Reddit: "where have you received a lifetime ban from? What did you do? Have you ever tried re-entering said place? Did you get caught?"

These 20 people share what got them 86'd for life from a place or establishment, and what happened afterwards:

1.) From SPOOFE:

My brother has a lifetime ban from Kickstarter for trying to start a Kickstarter to raise funds to buy Kickstarter.

2.) From Hunting_Gnomes:

I am banned for life from the Mall of America for throwing bouncy balls off of the 4th floor. I wasn't trying to hit anyone, I just wanted to see how high they would bounce.

I go to the mall every couple months like a bad ass. I've never been caught.

3.) From Evman2011:

I can no longer drive in Virginia because I never paid a speeding ticket, since I was just driving through it to get to New York.

4.) From CA1900:

Embassy Suites -- not me, but my brother.

He was a young kid who had just moved to California and was trying to make ends meet. He discovered the free breakfast and free cocktails at the Embassy Suites near his apartment.

Those are intended for guests, of course, but if you look like you belong in a place, people don't usually ask questions.

He got away with it for SIX MONTHS before they caught him. I was very impressed.

5.) From Rickrickrickrickrick:

Sears. I stole candy when I was 11 and the head of security was an asshole.

In my defense I weighed a piece of candy on the scale and it said "$0.00" on it. I just kept weighing the pieces one by one. I like to think I was more of a genius than a thief.

6.) From nilok1:

Placed an order for a pizza from a local pizza place. Found out they wouldn't deliver b/c the tenant who lived in my apartment before I did bounced a check. I explained that that person had moved out. They told me the ban was on the unit number not an individual. I called back and placed the exact same order but had it delivered to neighbor across the hall. Became the standard way of ordering from that pizza place.

7.) From SteoanK:

Wearing a kilt to a strip club is apparently "frowned upon".

8.) From DrStephenFalken:

A mini-golf course by my house.

I was 12. I took $50 (all of my Birthday money) and I was dead set on having a good time at the local mini golf, arcade, pizza place. This place had an arcade and pizza parlor inside the main building. One of the machines was a coin pusher that was right next to the ticket booth / pay window at the back of the arcade. The coin pusher always had a good payout. People were winning all the time it dropped coins like crazy at least I thought so.

So I figured $20 in quarters should allow me to win the roll of rubber banded cash on top of some more money. I put $20 in quarters into that machine and got the roll of money to the very edge. I was certain I was about to make bank. So I drop $10 more in and didn't get the money. The money was being held in place by Satan himself. So I kicked the machine out of young anger. The money roll dropped into the "win area" and an alarm went off on the machine. I quickly grabbed the roll of money and jammed in it my underwear. The security guard approaches me coming all the way from the main door. He takes me to an office via a side door. They tell me I'm banned for life for destroying their property, but they won't call my parents or the cops since I've haven't caused trouble before. I was also told I wouldn't be allowed to collect the money from kicking the machine. Little did they know that I had been collecting every coin as it dropped in the machine from my $30 already ( kids in the arcade were known for trying to steal it as it dropped) and I had the roll of money in my underwear from kicking the machine.

So I was banned for life, I walked home and counted my sweet $52 in winnings.

9.) From Population-Tire:

I have a friend who was banned from a local grocery store for stealing. This was in a small town and it was the only grocery store for miles. The next day, he got a call from his identical twin brother asking why he was just thrown out of a super market.

10.) From Garrilland:

Got banned from Club Penguin for calling someone a penis after losing a sled race

11.) From jplevene:

I've got a life time ban from eBay because I took them to court for overcharging and taking money from me. Apparently having the audacity to hold them to task for wrongdoings gets you a lifetime ban.

Still going through the courts in the UK.

12.) From AndeeDrufense:

I am banned from the local Burger King. In 8th grade I, along with another kid, changed the reader board to say "$3/2 fish dicks" or something along those lines. Needless to say they weren't impressed.

The other kid got caught and ratted me out as the sole performer, leading to me being banned but not him. I went back a week later and enjoyed a chicken tendercrisp sandwich.

13.) From [deleted]:

Key Largo House Boat Rentals/ The Boatel in Key Largo, FL. My girlfriend and I went there expecting a hotel experience (just as the place advertises). Well we get there and have to pay the week upfront, it was about $800. The place turned out to be a total shit hole. The boat smelled like mold and within the first few hours, water dumped out of the ceiling AC unit and onto my girlfriend's head. While showering the next day, the water was cut off. We decide to complain but the owner accused us of lying about everything. We came up with an elaborate lie about how we have to leave for a family emergency and need a refund. Nope. Well, somehow my girlfriend's crazy aunt got the places number and called to bitch the owner out about how the place sucked and we deserved a refund. That's where he caught us in the lie and kicked us out at 10pm. We ended up getting a refund thats to the crazy aunt, which was nice.

14.) From T3chM4n:

The Burger King in my hometown when I was 16.

They were doing one of those movie promotions (I think for Spider-man 2) where if you order certain sizes, your drink/fries came with stickers that had a chance of winning a prize, most of the time it was free food. On one of our late night trips we met a disgruntled employee that really didn't like his job and admitted he was quitting soon. Being the greedy teenagers we were, we asked if that meant he would give us a stack of king size fry containers and to our surprise he did!

Spent some time going through our "loot" that night and discovered we won a shitload of breakfast items and decided to go back for breakfast and cash in (4 or 5 of us total). We checked and couldn't find any rule about how many you could use at one time and neither could the cashier at the time (different person from the night before) and she wasn't told any different, so she was going to allow it.

In comes the fun-ruining manager who tells us we can't do that. Of course we question him and ask him to show us where it says we couldn't do that and he refused and told us to leave. Before leaving we ask for a number to call and file a complaint and he insisted he was the owner of the franchise and all numbers lead to his cell phone anyway and he can get away with whatever he wants "even if that means spitting in your food". I found a 1-800 # on a receipt or something and told him I would try anyway. He told us to leave again and never come back, but followed us to the parking lot and wrote down my license plate # as we drive away.

The next day I get a visit from a local police officer informing me I have to go to the station and sign some papers agreeing to never go back. I signed, they gave me a copy, and I proudly taped it to my bedroom door for all my friends to see. Yes, I still go to that Burger King and that manager wasn't there for long.

15.) From satsumaa:

I have a lifetime ban from the Hobby Lobby in my town. I got into a huge fight with the fabric lady.

The store advertised 50% off seasonal fabric. So I bought this cute pumpkin pattern that was in the bin. As I went to check out, she informed me ever so rudely that Halloween wasn't seasonal, it was a holiday.

This turns into a yelling match about why it was in the "seasonal 50% off" bin then...which accumulated into me being banned. Because they cant handle my realness.

16.) From 90s_Dad_Dick:

i got banned from a local bank branch for taking the bowl of lollipops. I went back a few weeks later to get some more lollipops and they remembered.

17.) From AiKantSpel:

There's a pretty cool underground club in my town. The owner's girlfriend didn't tell me she had a boyfriend.

18.) From kungn14:

6 Flags. During the long wait to the top of the stairs for the giant funnel water slide you ride down in a tube with several others, I decided rides were not worth the wait. I jumped out of my tube on the slide down and was running up the sides of the funnel and sliding down. The security got me after I did a swan dive through the tube, and took me to the security headquarters and even took a mugshot. This whole ordeal lasted about 2 hours, but the cheers and glory I got from the patrons in line are everlasting.

19.) From CRFyou:

At 16 I was banned from the local Sports Chalet for accidentally discharging a can of bear mace and it getting sprayed onto a baby that a mother was pushing in a stroller.

-Okay, more detail... It was summertime in 1997. Back then, we would skateboard around town getting kicked out of places for skating on stairs, rails, whatever. So we would explore stores since skateboarding was a crime.

We were looking around the outdoor section of Sports Chalet and found bear mace. It was something that appeared super humorous to us as we never knew such a thing existed. So like any curious teen with a weapon the size of a small fire extinguisher, we started to open the packaging to get a better look at it. I don't remember what it had for a safety. But our backs were to the aisle as the lady and baby walked by and the furious discharge from one of us setting it off freaked us out.

It got in our eyes and we sprinted to the bathroom. We were trying to neutralize it when the manager ran in there and yelled at us. We had no idea we almost post-birth aborted that baby. He walked us out and told us to never come back.

A month later my father wanted to sign us up for SCUBA lessons. He got certified when he was 16 and wanted to go through it with me when I was 16 so we could hang out underwater together. Guess where he signed us up at... Turns out the store manager was also the Dive Master.

I wondered if he would recognize me. He did. He took me aside at the end of the first day and told me, "I remember you from a month ago..." And good guy Dive Master left it at that. He didn't even tell my father. Maybe because the program was $500/person? But that's all I have to say about that...

20.) From Slimpikin:

Walmart, about 18 years ago.

I was working as a union organizer, and kept going into a walmart to talk to workers there about the benefits of the union.

I would talk to two or three people, and then a manager would catch me and kick me out. The second time I was told to not come back, but of course I did. The third, fourth, and fifth times I was charged with petty tresspass. The sixth, seventh, and eighth times I was charged with petty tresspass and breaching a court order. The ninth and tenth times I was charged with petty tresspass and contempt of court.

In court dealing with the 10th charge of petty tresspass, three breach of court order and one contempt charge, we reached a plea agreement.

I consented to a lifetime ban from walmart. The union agreed to stand surety in the amount of $10,000 for any breach of that ban in the process of conducting union business. I was given a conditional discharge on one count of petty tresspass, and the rest of the charges were dropped.

In the world of bad tattoos, there's something particularly cringe-worthy about people who get a word tattooed on their body in another language, only to find out that their tattoo doesn't mean what they thought.

Remember when Ariana Grande thought her tattoo said "seven rings," but it said "barbecue grill"? It's like that.

A man whose friend got a mistranslated tattoo has taken to Reddit to ask if he was the bad guy for "letting" said friend get the ink. The language in question is Irish, and the mistranslation may be enough to detonate this friendship.

The guy seeking advice can speak Irish, but lives in England:

I was born and raised in Ireland. While Irish Gaelic is sadly dying out, my grandparents spoke it fluently and taught it to my mother, so I, along with my brother, was raised bilingual and can speak both English and Irish. I moved to England about 2 years ago now.

He has a friend who's obsessed with Irish culture:

There's a guy who I'm friendly with, but he has this thing about Ireland. He's one of those people who's like "I know I seem English as they come but my mother's cousin's piano teacher's dog was an Irish setter so I'm part Irish", he talks about wanting to go to Ireland all the time and he has asked me to teach him Irish to "connect with our culture". I'm trying to be both vague and specific at the same time to give me some deniability but also communicate what kind of person I'm dealing with here.

The friend and his girlfriend share their love of (culturally appropriating) Ireland:

He's been seeing this girl for about a year and a half. She's in the same boat as him, both in terms of heritage and fondness for Ireland, and she's also talked about wanting to learn the language. Around 6 months ago they asked me to translate the word "soulmate" into Irish.

OP did his best with the translation, but the word doesn't really exist in Irish:

Here's the issue with that: there is no word for soulmate. There's a word for soul, and a word for mate, and if you put them together it makes "anam cara", but that basically means "soul friend", and isn't generally considered a romantic thing (and technically speaking it's not even grammatically correct and should be the other way round but this is the popular approximation of it).

The friend wouldn't really listen:

I did explain but he said that I was probably mistaken, because the concept of soulmates is universal. I went "well then anam cara it is, then" because I wasn't about to argue with him over the literal translation of a vague abstract concept in a language only I spoke. If he thought he was right, then why waste the energy correcting him (this isn't the first or last time I've had to take this approach with him).

They broke up after getting the couple's tattoo because of course they did:

6 or so months later, they've broken up. And my friend has messaged me asking if there's any variations on the phrase "anam cara". I asked why. He said that when they asked me for a translation of "soulmate" it was because they wanted to get matching tattoos for their first anniversary.

That's when OP came clean about the translation:

I then pretty much said that as anam cara is closer to meaning "best mate" than "soulmate", he can just apply it to a good friend of his. He then had a fit. Basically said he couldn't believe I'd let him get an incorrect tattoo, said he'd have to get a full cover-up now, and that I didn't even try correcting him.

It sparked an argument:

I responded that if I'd known this was a tattoo then I'd have done more but added that he's not the most... receptive to correction (my exact phrasing was "have you tried correcting you?").

OP's family members are divided as to whether he did something wrong:

I'm living with my dad and brother, and they both overheard. My brother is firmly on my side but my dad, who's English and made a similar mistake while married to mum, says I should have done more to get context, correct him, and even said I should offer to pay half the cost of the cover-up because it's "partially [my] fault" for "letting" him get the wrong thing.

[Am I the a-hole]?

Most people agree that OP did everything he could.

Christmas850 says it's clear the friend wouldn't have listened anyway — and added their own similar story:

You explained, but he didn't want to hear it. His heart was already set on it. His problem.

I met a white dude at a bar once who bragged that he had the Chinese characters for "Live in the moment" tattooed on his neck. I didn't tell him that it translated closer to "HEALTH NOW".

Amraff points out that the friend never said the translation was for a tattoo:

He never told you it was for permanent etching into his skin so due diligence is on him to confirm. You were nice enough to find a close translation for him when he pushed it instead of messing with him.

My friends would have given me the word for "stupid person" or something in this scenerio. Lol

AlackofAlice points out that even though it sounds bad, what OP did wasn't wrong:

I was expecting my judgement to be the opposite but man, that was hilarious. Serves him right.

Moral of the story, don't get matching tattoos and don't get tattoos in a language you don't speak. I thought this was just common knowledge...

And livimary understood why OP is aggravated with his friend's Ireland obsession in general:

I understand this to my BONES. So many people trying to act like they’re in the same boat as me (even one insisting they’re more Irish bc their families emigrated? While they talk to me, a financial immigrant) like please ireland isn’t fairies and celtic crosses it’s boojum in the rain and stalking the stephen’s green toilet bc you’re on a day out to Dublin but you want to wait for the guard to leave so you can piss for free.

They continue:

Countries can be romantic, but to boil them down to nothing more is not really empathetic with the community. Don’t even get me started on the preference on Irish ‘blood’ over residence. Only a couple of years ago that kid from Bray almost got deported to a country where he’d no citizenship or language skills.

DestinyCrusader points out that the real meaning of "anam cara" isn't even bad:

I actually can't even figure out the problem with "anam cara" meaning "soul friend." Mate, after all, is used interchangeably as friend or lover. Sometimes best friends call each other their soulmates. I've never considered soulmate a purely romantic thing, but even if I did, your lover can easily be your best friend because they should be the closest to you?

I guess what I'm saying is that your friend is just getting worked up for no reason, lol. Your translation wasn't even wrong, per se, just not an exact equivalent. But most languages don't have that anyway.

The verdict is clear: what you tattoo on your body is your responsibility and no one else's.

Hope this guy's friend has a good time designing his cover-up...

As pandemic lockdowns continue to ease (and in some cases, recommence...) around the world, many are debating whether it's a good idea to send children back to school.

Some argue that keeping schools shut would harm children, while others argue there's no way to re-open without infecting some students and teachers. A recent Reddit thread asked teachers and school employees to share how they felt about it, and there was a wide range of responses. Here are some of them.

1. This British teacher is concerned for her low-income students.

In the UK (English) Secondary Schools are are due back in full in September with no expectations of social distancing and very little guidance for risk assessment. I work in the worst affected borough of London where huge numbers of our kids have lost family members. Over 50% of kids live in poverty, we have the highest levels of gang crime, radicalisation, sex trafficking, child abuse, and neglect, and only around 5 - 10% of kids in classes have had access to internet for remote learning since we went into lockdown in March.

Many I haven't heard from at all. Social services and child protective services are already overwhelmed.

I am worried for myself and my colleagues as we enter precarious working conditions. But mostly I worry for the kids and their community. We cannot go back to normal and many will be deeply traumatised. When I try to talk about how anxious I feel, nobody in my family or friendship group understands, they just tell me to stop worrying and enjoy my summer break.

- pinjoo

2. Even the stress of figuring it all out could affect school workers badly.

My wife is a principal, and she's been at her school every day (including during the lock-downs/quarantines), trying to figure this out. I fear for her health and safety, especially her mental and emotional well-being. I see the enormous amounts of stress being put upon her, and it kills me that I can't help. There are some truly cruel parents/people out there who feel they can treat my wife and her staff like trash because...well, I don't know why. I'd imagine most are just as frustrated as she is and they're just taking it out on the school, but some are just self-centered, entitled a**holes.

Why make an already difficult situation harder? Despite what some might believe, teachers and staff haven't been lounging around at home, mailing it in and collecting pay - if anything, they're working harder and longer than ever. Given almost no notice, teachers and administrators had to completely redesign what school looks like - almost overnight - and they succeeded. Kids were learning, children were being fed, needs were being met in the midst of a global crisis. No state agency did that, no so-called national experts on curriculum.

The local educators fixed it in hours. Our government, with its infinite power, wealth, and resources, hasn't done anything but pretend the problem isn't there. In fact, state and federal policies actually made things more difficult, but local schools figured out how to get around that, too. No complaining, no protesting - just solutions and amazingly clever plans. Remember that the next time someone tries to convince you that teachers don't deserve better pay and benefits. Remember that the next time someone tells you that teachers have it easy or try to persuade you that educators are not among the smartest, most ingenious people in our society. - CaptainWisconsin

3. This teacher has "mixed feelings."

I have very mixed feelings. I really miss my students and can't wait to see them. I know that online learning isn't the same. But I also fear for their health and the health of their families. - GaryJulesMCOC

4. This speech pathologist thinks it might be better to stay home.

I'm a speech pathologist, so while not a teacher, I do consider myself an educator. I provided services via telehealth from March through June (and continue to do so for those students who require summer services.) Two of my kids have highly intensive needs, so I see them at their home once a week now (which is terrifying, but it's what they need to make progress.)

The way I see it is, in March (I am in NY, so I am going on that timeline), we had to learn a COMPLETELY different way of doing things. It was hard for the educators and the students - especially the students. So to me, going back to in-person learning is not the best choice as it will look very different from in-person learning in the past. It's a lot of change for anyone, let alone young children.

And if the numbers go up? We close all over again? I truly do not believe it is worth it. I understand the fact that many people rely on schools as child care, but I also think that it is up to the government to handle that (high hopes, I know). I have many ideas on this whole thing that I could go on and on about. But that's just my two cents. - CarrotCake2020

5. This college professor thinks the hassle of online learning might be worth it.

College professor here. I really miss the wonderful classroom dynamics that in-person learning makes possible. Online learning makes discussions more strained and shallow. I also really love working with my students and discussing their projects one-on-one. That is much harder to do remotely.

However, I care about my students as people, and the thought of making them and their families sick by returning to campus too soon makes me very worried. I want them to get a good education, but not at the expense of their health and wellbeing. I would rather work twice as hard to make online learning successful than risk them getting sick or losing parents and grandparents to this illness. - Netflix_and_backrubs

6. This teacher doesn't trust teens to socially distance.

I’m terrified. I work at a high school in Texas. Last year my largest class had 36 students. Between kids not having school supplies, passing in the hallways, gym, sports, discipline, & teenage hormones I know for a FACT that social distancing & keeping things clean can’t work. If full grown adults refuse to wear a mask then imagine 1000s of teenagers.

Our school has a daycare too, with babies. It’s too risky & it’s unfair to ask us to risk not only our lives but the lives of our students. This is not a hoax. There is no getting back to normal. We either have to accept it or risk certain death. I am not exaggerating with any of this. - BlkMsFrizzle

7. This teacher in Taiwan won't stop wearing a mask until the risk is down to zero.

I'm in Taiwan so we've been in person teaching all along. We have so few cases it's probably unnecessary to keep wearing masks and spacing the students out, but we're continuing anyway, and it drives me nuts that people have decided that masks are optional now. (To be fair, the school year ended yesterday and the government technically didn't say anything about "cram schools" which are after school education programs, so they're not breaking a government mandate by "forgetting" their masks.)

I will continue wearing a mask until I'm absolutely convinced the risk is close to zero, so probably until it's eradicated here or there's a vaccine. All it takes is one asymptomatic super spreader, or one selfish jerk breaking quarantine, to fuck it up for everyone. Also I teach at five or six different locations every week, so if I did get it I'd be responsible for spreading it around the entire district. - NeonHairbrush

8. This teacher says there's nothing heroic about being forced to work through a pandemic.

My district has voted for a blended learning model that has half the kids in the building at a time, but our hallways and bathrooms aren't big enough for true social distancing, and even if they were... even adults are not doing well with perfect mask compliance, and children are definitely not going to manage it.

I'm just hoping that my district changes their mind as we get closer to the start date. If not, hope B is that when enough people get sick, they'll have to close, and maybe I can avoid being in that first wave of illness if I'm extremely scrupulous in my own mask usage and hand-washing and also get lucky.

This is absolutely unsafe. Teachers are going to be dying by mid-September.

If one of them is me, my dying wish is this: if you hear anyone, in any place or context, refer to teachers as "heroes" in association with COVID-19, I want you to BOOOOOO really loudly for a long time. Including at funerals. ESPECIALLY at funerals. - Digger-of-Tunnels

9. Teachers miss regular school too, but that doesn't mean they want to go back.

My wife's county have voted on an In-Person/Virtual plan which means she will have to go to school everyday of the week. She's stressed. She wants to do all virtual for at least the first semester. She misses regular school but the stress of all of these procedures and risk is too much. Why should she have to risk her health for this? She's not a doctor treating someone sick, she's an underpaid teacher who is capable of teaching online.

Parents should be yelling at their places of work or their governments instead of the school systems if they aren't able to work from home and accommodate their kid's virtual learning. Instead, teachers are getting blamed once again for this set up and parents don't give two shits about their health and safety. - forman98

10. Some teachers question why there's such a rush to reopen.

Kansas actually [...] won’t be starting until after Labor Day. As a Missouri teacher, I’d wholeheartedly support us following their lead. - ve_lo

11. "School will NOT be normal."

The issue is that all these parents want us to go back to “normal” school but fail to realize school will NOT be normal.

No good morning hugs and high fives. No fun projects with partners. No team-building activities like marshmallow tower or saving Fred. No independent centers with shared materials. No shared technology permitted. No library books. No playground equipment. No classroom helper jobs (paper passer, librarian, board-eraser, etc).

No restorative circles with an actual talking piece. No special handshake to start class. No reading with a teddy bear or on a floor pillow. No switching seat privileges. No cafeteria antics. No visible smiling (masks). No teacher’s chair privileges. No kinder buddies (my class always helps in preK and kinder with a ton of stuff). No group counseling in the very small counselors office.

The list goes on. My year can’t be done in person because what makes teaching in person so incredible, won’t be allowed or possible. - seleaner015

12. It's hard to trust those in power.

I work at the college level. No, just no. I don't trust my school or my students to take the necessary steps to keep us all safe. - readthesyllabus

13. This poor teacher is having a terrible time.

Short answer but I'm in a unique position but my Dad died from the virus. I hate it. I got sent home this week and told to come back in September because I keep having breakdowns over kids telling me there is no virus, or that it only kills old people. UK btw where we are so severely hit. Honestly I can't be at work right now I'm too scared and too angry and deep deep within mourning. - iplaybloodborne

14. This teacher is terrified.

Tbh, I’m terrified to go back and I’ve been dealing with a lot of anxiety around the pandemic this whole time. The thought of going back to college where the students are going to continue throwing huge parties and not giving a s***, and then coming to class to infect everyone else absolutely freaks me out. - ZOSOtelecast

15. So is this librarian.

I am a school librarian at an elementary school with 900 students. I am young. I have no children. I am healthy.

I am f****** terrified.

I may love being a 'hero' to your kids, but I did not sign up to be an actual "knowingly lay down your life" hero.

The fact that so many are urging us to go back to "protect the economy" shows just how f***** this whole system is.

Staying home is absolutely causing trauma for everyone, staff and students. But will it cause more trauma when their teacher, principal, para, custodian, dies? Not to mention their grandma or aunt or parents or classmate. - spoonugget

16. This teacher has a simple response.

Two words. F***. This.

I love and miss my kids. But I don't want them/their families/me/my family to get sick. - pauladeanlovesbutter

17. This teacher is worried because of his health condition.

I’m a 32 year old “healthy looking” male who gets immunosuppressing infusions to treat ulcerative colitis...I teach middle school and the thought of being in a poorly ventilated classroom with 25 6th graders is terrifying...I have no desire to die and leave my two small children fatherless...I don’t see any way that in-person classes will work with how poorly our country has handled this pandemic. - vytamink22

18. Terrifying math.

Terrified.

I'm almost 40 but in very good health. Many of the people I work with are older and are not the healthiest.

Based on the numbers and the size of our school, going back to school means we will be burying 4-5 children and 1-2 teachers. - wardsac

19. "Our students have a history of not being very sanitary."

Not feeling very good. Working in a Jr High, our students have a history of not being very sanitary. Combine this with our staff mostly being over the age of 50, and I only see bad things happening. - RagingRamen95

20. It took a board of education member getting COVID-19 for this district to understand.

My wife teaches and has been watching the school board meetings all summer to try to find out what will happen come August.

June board meeting: Just put them back in the class room!

July board meeting: (note, one of the board members came down with covid at the beginning of the month, and has actually had to deal with it) Uhh... Lets seriously look at distance learning.

im of the opinion if one of the board members didn't get covid, we would have be looking at going back to at least a mixed model, or even possibly a complete re-opening come August. - C_Alan

21. Some students' needs aren't being met unless they're in school.

A mixed bag. I’ve been worried about my students (access to food, safety, clean clothing, etc) and if they’re in person I can make sure some of their more basic needs are being met. (Lower income school that has resources to assist) I also know that without in person classes, not all learning needs are met, especially those within the special education realm. I’m also aware that coming back in person puts the health of many students, families, and educational professionals in harms way. It really feels like a lose lose situation. - colbiyn

22. Teachers are worried about students refusing to wear masks.

Not great. Our principal just left, so I’m even more concerned about the transition. Admin has also been bending over backwards for patents recently, and I don’t think they’ll back up teachers if students refuse to wear masks or follow proper protocol. I also informed my family today that I likely won’t be joining family events once the school year starts if we go back in person. - budlightlime

23. Teachers with immuno-compromised children of their own are especially worried.

I teach kindergarten and I’m terrified. I agree kids need to be in school. They need the interaction and some need to get away from their families but I just can’t see us doing it in a safe way. I work in a city that was the poorest city in the US multiple times. School is all some of these kids have. I’m so worried about them.

However I have a 3 year old and a 1 year old with an immune disorder. Last fall and winter I had to change clothes before leaving school and shower before picking him up to keep him safe. What happens with Covid? I don’t think I can keep him safe. What if one of my school kids die or even my son? I’m absolutely terrified. - estau329

Turns out, there's a shocking amount of people who are under the impression that it's perfectly acceptable to propose at someone's else's wedding? Just to clear that up: it's never ok! Abort mission! Put that ring right back in your pocket! This is not your day.

Unless you get a sealed and signed stamp of approval from the couple that they're ok with you making their celebration of love about your own relationship, you better think twice before making any major life announcements on someone's wedding day. Weddings require a great deal of planning and financial stress, and nobody wants to drain their savings account on an open bar just so their uncle can hijack the family gathering and renew his vows with his fourth wife. Excited to tell the whole family that you're expecting a baby? Cool! A wedding is not the time, Aunt Liz.

While weddings are always intended to be an event that honors the love a couple shares, reality has taught us that they can sometimes bring out the worst qualities in people. Brides who were previously normal people can definitely lose themselves in the chaos of flower frenzy, theme colors, bridesmaid squabbles and finding the perfect centerpieces. Doing anything that would take the spotlight off of the couple is a universally agreed-upon selfish and disrespectful move.

So, when a recent Reddit user consulted the internet to ask for advice about whether or not he should allow his brother to pop the question on his wedding day, people were definitely eager to help enforce the code of wedding etiquette.

AITA (Am I the As*hole?) for threatening to ban my brother from my wedding because he plans on proposing to his girlfriend during the reception?

I (25M) am getting married in December. My fiancée (24F) and I both are very excited and busy planning, and this incident is making things much more stressful.

A couple weeks ago I was talking about the wedding with my brother (30M) and he asked if it'd be okay for him to propose to his girlfriend at our wedding. I laughed and said "Yeah, sure, if you want to get your a*s handed to you by my fiancée". He laughed, and I figured he got the message.

The other day my fiancée came to me, in tears, saying that my brother had called her and thanked her for letting him propose at the wedding. She told him that had never happened, and he wasn't allowed to do that, and he just laughed and thanked her again.

I called my brother back and asked him what was going on. He's insisting that he's going to propose to his girlfriend at the wedding. He claims it's "getting even" for when I announced our engagement at the same family dinner he brought his girlfriend to meet the family (I had no idea, they arrived separately and she got there after I had made the announcement).

I told him if he doesn't get it through his head that he is absolutely not allowed to propose, both him and his girlfriend won't be allowed into the wedding at all, and if he tries to pull a stunt, he'll be kicked out immediately.

He didn't take it well and told the whole family. My fiancée and I have been getting calls and messages from them telling us how shitty we are for doing that, how dare I turn my back on my brother.

He's also now blaming me for spoiling the proposal to his girlfriend and the family, because if I hadn't been "such an ass", he wouldn't have had to break the news to the family like this. I still stand by what I did, I don't think I was out of line at all, but my fiancée thinks we should have just let him propose to avoid conflict. I know it means a lot to her that everyone gets along and that there's no hard feelings, especially since she's feeling stressed as is, but I don't want to give in to my brother.

AITA? (Am I the As*hole?)

Of course, people were quick to weigh in on this one...

it’s your wedding. Besides, proposing at a wedding is super awkward. Like. The wedding is about the couple, not someone who’s going to be getting married in the future. - Lunararchon

“He didn’t take it well and told the whole family.” “He’s also now blaming me for spoiling he proposal to his girlfriend and the family...”

Maybe if he didn’t want the news spoiled the for whole family, he shouldn’t have told them?? Literally all he had to do was accept that this proposal wasn’t happening at the wedding, and his girlfriend and his family would have had no idea. He brought this all on himself. - mrsrinkles3

It baffles me why so many people think proposing at a wedding is okay. It is so damn tacky. If you want to celebrate a proposal with family plan an engagement party🤷🏼‍♀️ - yankee174

You just don’t announce news or propose at a wedding. It’s a celebration of two people not a party. - potato-chase

stand your ground on this. It sounds like he’s doing it to annoy you not because he even wants to propose to his girlfriend at the wedding. - TroyandAbed_Morning

You do not co-opt other people's events for your own announcements. That's tacky and massively rude and disrespectful. I hope you realize that your bother is going to tell you that he won't propose just so he can be invited then spring the proposal anyway, right? You can ban him from getting anywhere near a microphone, and he'll still find some way to make a scene for himself. -Sharikacat

There are some rules for weddings - you don't wear white, you don't ask about the ex's, and you don't propose at another person's wedding! Your brother sounds mean and your family sounds unsupportive though... maybe call up your folks and find out why they think you're turning your back on him? - MissionRelataionship7

He also responded to some comments, clarifying why his family isn't being supportive:

I think it's because he's telling them a completely false version of what happened.

From what I've heard, he's telling relatives that he asked me if he could "quietly pull his girlfriend aside to propose, and announce it to people near the end of the reception". When he asked me, he wanted my fiancée to rig the bouquet toss, asked for confetti, and even requested a special dance for them. The first one obviously makes me look a bit like an unsupportive a*s. - bridezilla13

So, there you have it!

While some people love to make their proposal an event that involves the whole family, that's a gathering you're responsible for planning yourself, and a wedding isn't an opportunity to make a party about you. This brother needs to spend a few hours watching any wedding-themed reality show and learn that proposing at a wedding is a major misstep, and it's definitely not an argument worth losing your invitation to your own brother's wedding. Hopefully, he sees the light! Good luck, everyone.

Professors and teachers discussed the funniest, most absurd and most obviously written-under-the-influence emails they've received from students. Even though these students didn't study creative writing, they were certainly inventive with their excuses and alibis.

Pro tip for students: when booking your Spring Break trip, make sure it's compatible with your school's calendar.

1. You done good, kid.

I teach a literacy course for college freshmen and international students. In my international section, one of my written [evaluations] said "He make English teaching good." I really don't think they were trying to be funny. It's my favorite of all of the evaluations I've ever gotten. -stellarpath

2. Thanks, Obama.

High school teacher. None of them were drunk (although one dropped her purse, included a bottle of beer, spilling it all over my class), but here are the highlights:

-both student and parent, emailing me, principal, school board, and Obama trying to get me fired.

-notification about missing the last month of school, including finals, because of cheap vacation airfare

-a student forwarding an email about groupmates being mean (because she wasn't doing anything) and accidentally cc'ing her groupmates. -dkl415

3. Always brace for an attack.

One of my (international) students e-mailed me to say, "Dear ___, I am sorry I cannot come to class today. I was attacked by diarrhea." I'm pretty sure he wasn't drunk, but it was still funny! -iamaravis

4. The file couldn't have been more wrong.

He thought it was his paper he was sending me in that email...

It was actually a photo of him snorting cocaine. -nervehacker

5. Spring break is forever.

I taught in the school of business at a large state university. I once had a student complain that I scheduled a test during spring break. I replied that she must be mistaken, it wasn't during spring break, the school was open that week.

She replied explaining that spring break is about a month long as colleges around the US celebrate it at different times, and she would be in Cancun with her friends that week because that was when their university was having spring break.

Also, she was a senior. -jarluch

6. Thoughts and prayers.

This student wasn't drunk, but it was hilarious nonetheless.

I failed a student (who VERY much deserved the failing grade), who was also a football player at a very religious private institution. The student emailed me after final grades were submitted tell me that I'm the worst teacher ever because I didn't respect that he was an athlete and that despite all of that, he would pray for me.

I didn't even respond. All I could do was laugh. -cms8806

7. Nice try.

I got one with the salutation "Dear old guy" from a student. I am a young woman. -thenerdiestmenno

8. She needs Jesus.

I was inadvertently copied on an email from one of my female piano students to a male organ major, which included a p.s. saying "I wonder how big your professor's organ is?"

(I'm guessing they were under the influence because it was date-stamped 2:37 a.m.) -Back2Bach

9. Was the deadline chill though, bro?

I taught a while back at a big state school in the South. In a freshman-level class, one student wrote an email to me asking for an extension on a paper that began with the salutation "Sup, my nig?" I don't remember it word-for-word (should have saved it!), but he asked if I could "be chill" about the deadline, and closed with "thanks, bro".

For reference, I'm white, and the student in question was an American of Iranian descent.

I couldn't stop laughing at it. I mean, what must be going through his head to think that calling his professor "my nig" is a good idea? -FunkyChromeMedina

10. The course was just that good.

Not an email, but I worked in the history department back in college and one of the professors had a course review that a student did posted up on his door... the question was "please outline the strengths and weaknesses of this course" and the person didn't write anything, just drew this crazy, elaborate drawing of a chicken flying over a rainbow with a jetpack. -gimmefantastic

11. Praise be.

Canceled class one morning, and a student sent me an email very soon after. All it said was "You are a blessing."

Kinda want to print it out and frame it or something. -allisvanitas

12, It works if they were studying to be a proctologist.

Senior year of college, I accidentally emailed my professor an earlier draft of a paper instead of the final version. I always fill in the title spot on my papers with something stupid until the paper's done, and for this one I had happened to choose "buttholes." my professor waited almost two weeks to see if I would notice what ( had done before emailing me back and asking if this was really the version of the paper I wanted to turn in, as it was only two pages long and he didn't quite understand the title. -buttcake

13. Hot for teacher.

My first year bio professor showed us an email he received from a student that went somethink like:

"Hi Mr.X, how about you and me unzip our genes and replicate."

I think it had to be a joke, but it was funny. -NightHawk521

14. Oops.

At my college students were able to mass email the class. So sometimes, always right before finals, the whole class (sometimes up to 200 students) would receive an email from some dipsh*t asking if someone could send them the completed study guide. -YoungAdult_

15. Turn in for what?

My friend sent an email to her professor saying that her final paper was "turnt up" instead of "turned in". Thankfully the professor had a sense of humor and it turnt up alright.. -ms_congeniality

15. That stinks.

Former T.A here.

I received an email from a student saying he could not make it to the bio lab that day because a family of skunks had taken up residence under his house and he smelled too bad to come to lab.

I am not sure if it was real but I thought it was very creative! -jakeandamirlove

Food delivery drivers and food service workers are more essential than ever right now to helping keep Americans fed, and fueling the economy. But that doesn't mean they're always being given the respect they deserve. Unfortunately, customer service workers are treated abysmally in this country—they're underpaid, under-tipped, and often disrespected and straight-up harassed by customers. A recent viral Twitter thread serves as an infuriating reminder that this problem is not getting any better during the pandemic.

A guy who works for GrubHub shared a nightmarish text exchange he had with a customer who got angry about their order and took it out on the delivery driver.

This exchange should make anyone with a shred of human decency want to grind their teeth in rage. And it's not even a rare experience for people who work in this industry.

People who've worked in customer service are replying to the tweet with their own stories of customers from Hell. Here are 29 of the worst stories, proving the customer is not always right:

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A few people offered up some potential solutions to the problem:

Others are just fed up with humanity-at-large:

I don't know who needs to hear this but, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, PLEASE, TIP YOUR SERVERS.

It's normal to cry when something intensely emotional or devastating happens, but we've also all probably found ourselves crying over confusingly trivial situations...

A puppy simply existing? A baby's laugh being dangerously adorable? You're having a bad day and then you drop your groceries all over the floor of a crowded bus? Time to cry like it's the apocalypse and you're the last survivor of humanity.

Sure, small children will often throw loud, red-faced screaming temper tantrums with hot tears in the aisles of grocery stores simply because their parents tell them they can't have 4 boxes of sugary cereal. It's not as common for adults to completely lose it over small, seemingly unimportant events, but most of us have been known to do it anyway every now and then. Life is complicated, you deserve to cry because the gas station happens to have your favorite flavor of ice cream. You deserve it!

So, when a recent Reddit user asked, "What's the dumbest thing you ever cried over?" people were ready to share their tears of shame.

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One time I was PMSing real bad and a brick wall made me cry. I was trying to focus on something neutral in an attempt to reach emotional stability so I stared at a brick wall and it had the opposite of its intended effect- that brick wall f*cking wrecked me. - fruitypants

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I once cried because my husband showed me pictures of a corgi meetup without any warning. - [deleted]

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After my appendix surgery, I was on a beautiful cocktail of painkillers and apparently very loopy. My mom tried to make me feel better by bringing me one of those amazing chocolate and cake confections that fancy bakers make to show off.

Unfortunately, the treat was shaped like an absolutely adorable snowman and I started sobbing at the idea of consuming something so cute. My mom thought this was hilarious and started filming me, but then I cried so hard I tore my stitches and had to go back in to get fixed up.

I’m so grateful I’m never going to have appendicitis again. - Lizphibian

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I hate killing mice. My husband hates mice. So we compromised that we'd get live traps for the mice in our house, and I'm take them out to the woods and let them loose when we caught them.

So, caught a mouse one day. Took it to the woods and let it loose. Got back in my car to leave, and the damn stupid mouse ran right out in front of my tire and I ran him over.

I sobbed for hours. Feeling totally ridiculous the whole damn time. - nick717

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A baked potato. It was cold. I was hormonal. My brother still makes fun of me for this. - kittensandcardigans

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I was in petsmart looking at chinchillas and the pamphlet mentioned these small marble slabs you can put in your freezer to help the chinchilla cool down. They called them chin-chillers and I started bawling - motherofgecko

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My first morning of college, I went to shower and the water was freezing and not warming up so I cried, because I missed the hot showers at home and thought they would be like this all year. But then, the water warmed up so I sobbed some more because I was so thankful - hurricanekytrena​​​​​​

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I cried over spilled milk as a teenager. I was pouring milk for my cereal on a school day... it was so early and I was so tired that I poured out half the gallon before I realized that my bowl had overflowed out onto the table and floor. My dad had just switched jobs a week before and took a massive pay cut so my parents were making it very aware to us that we needed to do everything we could to cut costs. I just lost it and started bawling while trying to mop it up. I was sobbing, "They work so hard for the money to buy this milk!"

On the way to school I realized that I literally cried over spilled milk and had a laugh. - simplerthings

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I was so hungry and tired and grumpy when I opened the takeout bag and the Thai place had forgotten the noodles for my dish. :( - Costner_Facts

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When I was 13, I cried to the episode of Spongebob where Gary leaves Spongebob for Patrick. - exit-thevoid

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I was having a terrible morning, with everything going wrong and my job was driving my crazy. So during lunch time I decided to get a McDonald's sundae and, since it was a bad day and I wanted to get better, I paid to get extra chocolate syrup. I waited, received the sundae and looked for a bench to sit and eat it. When I sat, I realized they forgot to put my extra syrup. I was already so pissed off at everything that, instead of going back and asking for the syrup, I just started crying like crazy while eating the not-as-expected sundae. - [deleted]

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I dropped a huge bottle of ketchup in the kitchen.

The thing exploded EVERYWHERE. At the time I had awful flu. I was on my hands and knees cleaning up what looked like a murder scene. Kept finding ketchup for weeks. - onefortysevenone

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I tend to get emotionally attached to objects for some reason. Not really sure why. But one time I cried for a whole hour over losing my favorite pencil. I managed to find it later in my bag and cried again over how happy I was. - Yxurr

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When my lost luggage was returned to me.

Had a connecting flight from Amsterdam to Rome. But my luggage never made it on the plane in time. Spent 3 days wearing the same clothes around Rome. Cried and gave my suitcase a hug when it was delivered. - sayitloudsingitproud

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You know that amazon commercial where the baby is afraid of the dog but likes a toy lion so the dad gets the dog a lion mane and the baby pets the dog? Every f*cking time. Got a lump in my throat just typing this. - Reverse_Waterfall

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I imagined I named my dog 'Doctor', and the thought of it was so absurd that I cried laughing. - nowseehere-

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I had a day off and some extra magic mushrooms so i parked my car at a park and ate them, listened to some music and watched the trees in my car for awhile.

I forgot I had taken them when I started watching an old lady playing with her dog. It was really cute and they were having fun, and i was having fun watching them.

Suddenly it dawned on me that either the dog, or the woman would be dead at some point in the future, and they wouldn't have eachother forever. The existential realities of death and life swarmed me while I was watching the riveting game of fetch unfold.

I cried like a b*tch for like a full hour. Alone and tripping balls. - poseidons_wake

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I saw a "Happy Father's Day" card with Batman on the front :( - AtL_eAsTw0oD

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once I almost put my spoon into the microwave to heat it in order to get ice cream out of the carton easier... I felt really dumb. So dumb, I sobbed. - Jill4ChrisRed

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My hot dog bun broke in half when I wanted to put the sausage in it ... I was looking forward to that perfect hot dog all day and when the bun broke I started crying out of disappointment - Gwent_

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I was pregnant amd starting talking to someone who has college age kid. I started thinking my kids will do that one day 20 years in the future and started to cry. - raygrizz

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My dad recorded the 98 World Cup final over an episode of Arthur I didn't get around to watching yet. - StigsAznCousin

They say no good deed goes unpunished, and that goes doubly for romantic gestures.

In concept, elaborately surprising a loved one is a sweet motion plucked straight out of a romantic movie. But in reality, not everyone loves surprises, and a partner's response to the cover-up can overshadow the eventual reveal.

In a recent post on the TIFU subreddit, a husband shared how his attempt to surprise his wife for her birthday quickly spiraled into threats of divorce.

TIFU by trying to surprise my wife for her birthday and almost getting divorced

OP admitted that he hasn't been the most attentive husband as of late, and a recent call-out from her inspired him to make more effort to show her how much he cares.

I'll admit I haven't been the most attentive husband lately. My wife has told me I need to make more of an effort in our relationship or we would have problems. I've tried really hard to invest in our relationship ever since finding out my wife is not feeling as happy as she should be.

OP's wife loves surprises, so he figured a good way to up his game would be a night full of romantic surprises for her birthday.

This f*ck up happened last week. My wife's birthday was coming up. I decided to go big. My wife absolutely loves surprises so I decided to surprise her with a romantic night and lots of flowers and presents. She had to go to work in the morning of her birthday and I had the day off. A lot of time to plan everything out.

OP decided to cover up the surprised by pretending he forgot her birthday.

I decided, being the idiot I am, to pretend that I had forgotten my wife's birthday just to make the surprise, well, even more of a surprise. The plan was as follows: my wife wakes up and I don't mention her birthday. She thinks I've forgotten it. She goes to work and I get everything ready. She comes home in the evening after work and tadaa!! When she opens the door I'll be waiting for her with gifts, flowers dinner and everything romantic I could think of. Sounds like an amazing plan right? WRONG.

In his mind, this was the perfect bait-and-switch, but this is where things went south.

Nothing special happened in the morning and my wife left for work while I slept in. During the day I got everything ready and apart from mildly messing up the dessert everything went great. Then it was time to wait for my wife to return. She was supposed to get home after 4pm. 4:30pm nothing. 5pm still nothing. I was starting to get worried and I texted her where she was. Around 5:30pm she read my message but didn't reply. I called her and she didn't answer. I was starting to get extremely worried and texted her if she was okay. That's when she replied.

After not receiving any texts about her birthday, OP's wife told texted him sharing how neglected she felt.

She texted me opening up about how she couldn't believe I had forgotten her birthday even after her expressing to me how she had felt neglected in the relationship and wanting me to put in more effort. I, in all my stupidity, still decided to play dumb to make my big surprise work. I told her to just get home so we could talk about it. Big mistake.

Not wanting to ruin the surprise, OP asked her to come home so they could "talk," but this backfired and she mentioned divorce.

She told me she was done talking and started mentioning divorce. F*ck f*ck f*ck. That's when I called her and she still wouldn't answer. Then I panicked and started explaining everything to her by text. I took pictures of all the things I had done around the house, the gifts the flowers the decorations the dinner everything. I just wanted to surprise her that's all I wanted.

At this point, OP decided to lift the veil, and he started taking photos of all the decorations and gifts and flowers he'd spread around the house.

When OP's texts were left on read, he broke down, afraid his birthday gesture had triggered the end of their relationship.

I tried calling her to no avail. She read my messages and after not getting a reply I just broke and started crying. After what felt like the longest wait of my life my wife comes home. She's crying saying she's sorry. I told her it was my fault and we both just cried holding each other. We spent the night crying and cuddling and eating the dinner I made. She told me it was the best thing she had ever eaten (obviously a lie, it was mediocre at best and already cold). It wasn't the surprise I had hoped to give her, I'm just glad to still be married to her.

Eventually, though, she came home, and they had a tender night of crying and cuddling.

And yes we are working to fix our relationship. I love this woman with all my heart. I had her permission to share this.

TLDR; Wanted to surprise my wife for her birthday and pretended to forget her birthday to make the surprise better. She got really upset and started talking about a divorce. I ruined the surprise trying to explain myself and we spent the night of her birthday crying and cuddling.

People were quick to jump on the thread to share their thoughts.

ChrisFromIT emphasized the importance of always saying Happy Birthday, even if there's a surprise brewing.

This is why you always say happy insert special event, even if you have a surprise planned later in the day to celebrate.

hennwei gave OP a helpful pointer for next time.

Pro-tip. Next time when planning a birthday surprise, do it at midnight. and don't "pretend to forget" anymore. my wife loves being surprised too and pretending to forget is the worst thing, cause damn when those conspiracy theories start kicking in. Boy, do they go into overdrive.

SonOfABeachy has an idea for the next special occasion.

For your next trick you should pretend to forget her name for a few days, so that when you call her by the right name she’ll be extra happy and surprised.

Lizzyrules is glad to hear that OP and his wife are working things out.

Never, ever act like you forgot your partner's birthday. Get her/him a small gift, wish them happy birthday...but do something! That way you don't hurt their feelings that bad and you still get to surprise them.

Big thumbs up for listening to your wife and paying more attention to her. Even if it almost got you a divorce ;0)

amandapanda611 emphasized how much work the relationship requires, since OP's wife mentioned divorce over text.

Oh dear...

Well, I'm glad you two are working things out. But FYI, the fact she mentioned the D-word means this is far from the first time she's thought about it.

From here on out, you need to step your game up. She has one foot out the door and she's about to let it hit the ground. The worst possible thing you can do is to get her hopes up that everything will be different now and you fall back into the same old patterns and routines.

Best of luck to you both and happy birthday to your Mrs.

After receiving a lot of feedback to his story, OP jumped on the thread to updated everyone.

For all the concerned people, yes we are getting help and fixing things as I have stated before. I appreciate the concern but with all due respect, I'm going to take relationship advice from professionals and not from Reddit. It's weird to have people arguing about my relationship when frankly no one knows us or the situation we are in. I just wanted to share this story. Still, reading your personal experiences and what you have gone through is helpful so please do share if you feel like doing so!

Edit2: I'm getting so many comments about this that I've decided to address it here. I commented this before but I'm going to put it here too so people can see it better hopefully. Like some have said I wasn't really thinking about her when doing what I did, I made the whole surprise essentially about myself even though I didn't mean to. It was never my intention to make her feel bad even though I now realize that of course she would feel horrible for the whole day after I pretended to not remember her birthday. I've apologized for this and these things were talked about.

Really the only thing I was thinking was about wanting to surprise my wife and not about how my way of going about it was going to make her feel. My dumb logic was that hey, my wife loves surprises so I have to make the surprise as surprising as I can, any way I can. I never intended to make her feel bad but my lack of thinking made that happen and I feel horrible for it.

While this story ended well, it easily could've gone and stayed south, hopefully someone reading this is able to avoid a similar backfiring.

Finding love is difficult in every period in history, but it's especially difficult during a pandemic. Not only do dating apps have to do all the heavy lifting that would otherwise be helped by bars and parties, all of the days blend together along with people's standards. Here are some highlights from the summer so far.

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Parents: they raise us. They feed, clothe, and clean up after us for at least the first decade of life—and sometimes multiple decades. And, as I learned today, that may involve cleaning poop out of floor vents. And what do we do for them in return?! We give them fodder for some very, very funny tweets.

Here are 39 of the funniest and realest tweets from parents to enjoy in between toddler meltdowns:

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Doing the right thing may be good for your soul, but it doesn't always get rewarded by the outside world.

There are far too many examples of someone's goodwill being punished by corrupt institutions, taken advantage of by selfish people, or completely misconstrued amidst communication breakdown.

While there are small moments where this dynamic unfolds in subtle ways, some stories are so overt the reverse Karma is undeniable.

In a popular Reddit thread, people shared examples of times their good deeds backfired, and it's the opposite of schadenfreude.

1. From RealisticDelusions77:

Cal Poly University had an incident in the 80s that made the school paper. There was a former Mouseketeer who worked in food services and one day a student asked for help because his purchase hung in the vending machine. She opened it and give it to him, but an alarm went off. She waited for security and explained things to them, but still lost her job.

One day you're a TV performer watched by millions, later in life you're fired because of a snack.

2. From asciibits:

I'm late to the party, but...Richard Jewell.

The dude was a security guard at the 1996 Summer Olympics in Atlanta Georgia. He discovered a backpack full of pipe-bombs, notified the police, and was briefly hailed as a hero... before becoming the #1 suspect, and being raked over the coals by the media.

His life was destroyed. Depression led to exacerbation of his diabetes, and he died in 2007 at the age of 44.

3. From DominionGhost:

Guy lost his ID for work, I brought him directly to security to get it sorted and they fired me on the spot for allowing a trespasser entrance.

4. From tinkrman:

Saw two ladies from my office building struggling to load a table into van. They were moving from our building to a new place. I told them if they removed the legs it will be easier, and it will take less space. They told me they didn't have the tools. (Allen keys). So I went upstairs and brought my set down. When I started to remove the legs, they insisted they will do it and bring the set back to my office.

After a while I went downstairs, they were gone. Of course I should've figured they would take the set with them to reassemble the table at the new place. Never saw them again. Felt like an idiot.

5. From Ladyughsalot1:

I was an events florist. This bride lost her grandmother days before her event and asked if I would make a small vase arrangement to place next to her photo on a memorial table.

Of course. I said It would be similar to her smaller centerpieces; great. She asked how much and I said I would cover it happily.

In the review she complained that the memorial piece “which was supposed to be very special” looked too much like the centerpieces.

God forbid your free flowers be cohesive with your event you cow.

6. From ThadisJones:

I wrote a semi-popular plug-in for a software package that's common in my field and released it open source ("provided as is, no guarantee, warranty, or support is promised"). Occasionally I get an email asking a question which I am happy to answer if reasonable.

I'm currently in a dispute with a very angry professor in California who somehow thinks that I need to support him set up an entire bio-informatics pipeline because someone in his lab tried to download my free plugin.

7. From sagilabdomen:

Saving a girl from getting hit by a car, me getting hit in the process, but it turned into a hit and run and the girl left me behind on the concrete road.

8. From Teminite2:

I live in a dorm and I am usually giving out stuff to people who need them, whether it's cups or tea or whatever. Without noticing people got comfortable and my room has become an all you can grab raid fest, waking up every morning with one less item from my room.

9. From tamiraisredditing:

I gave money and made light conversation with a panhandler who frequented my campus. He ended up stalking me across three different address changes.

10. From blizzaga1988:

At my old cafe, I came in for the evening/closing shift and my friend/co-worker was there and said he'd be opening the store with Molly (fake name) the next morning and he would really love it if we could give him a good close (Molly was slow and incompetent and he didn't like working with her). So I went above and beyond. I left that cafe more pristine than ever and even took care of some of his morning tasks; specifically, weighing out the beans for the next day, which is a time consuming task they were expected to do in the mornings, and one in which he says Molly normally does and she takes way too long to do it.

I came in the next day to a note from him chastizing me for taking away their tasks. I was livid and told him to never ask me to do anything for him again.

11. From Good_parabola:

Basically anytime I do something extra for a customer. I give them the benefit of the doubt and take care of something that’s borderline? They are always the people that file a complaint about “omg, poor service!”

My office has a mantra that no good deed goes unpunished.

12. From deuteranopia:

When I was in the Air Force, I separated from my wife before a short tour overseas (England for 3 years). When I came back, we pursued a divorce (I was still getting paid for having a dependent since I was still technically "married" -- it was legit). When I went in to offer my finance group my divorce decree to get the dependent off my pay stub, the computer system was down, so I had to sign in on paper (they usually have a computer system to sign you in and direct you to the right person to help) and fill out all the paperwork by hand.

Six months later, I just happened to print up a pay stub to take in to Verizon to get a military discount on my bill and noticed that the dependent pay was still coming through. I verified every month prior to that as well (I wasn't checking each stub before then, just because I wasn't worried about how much was coming in -- so it's partially my fault).

When I went back to finance to tell them about it, they told me I was "stealing money form the government" and called my commander, who proceeded to demote me after I just tested for the next rank (I was a Tech Sergeant/E-6 at the time). They shredded my test results, took my stripe, and gave me an Article 15, non-judiciary punishment.

TL;DR -- I acted with integrity (the Air Force's #1 core value!), and was raked over the coals for it.

13. From LemonReasonable:

Man do I have a story for this. I (F) was driving home from my retail job late at night in Rochester NY and I see a guy and passenger fall off their motorcycle on the highway. So like any concerned person, I pull over to help and call 911.

But as I'm jumping out to go hell them, they're already walking to my Honda Civic coupe and insisting on getting in the car. I try telling them no you're a stranger don't get in my car but the driver (M) is shoving his passenger who I determine to be his girlfriend in my back seat and getting in. I didn't know if they were armed, I didn't know if they would threaten me or rape me. So I get in the car and drive, assuming I'm taking them to a hospital.

NOPE. I'm going to Brucie's house. This guy is bleeding from his leg in the front seat and directing me to their friend's house. So we get to Brucie's, and no one is home. So now, I'm driving to Tanya's. After one too many turns I finally lose my cool and kick them out on the curb. Thankfully, I wasn't threatened or harmed.

But as I hop back on to the highway, I see police where the motorcycle was left laying on the road. I pull over and tell them the whole story. They then inform me that the bike is stolen and they think that it's too coincidental that I would just happen to pull over and happen to help them. Nothing ever happened, I wasn't arrested. But what a night.

TL;DR I went to help a guy who fell off a motorcycle by calling 911 and instead I ended up driving him all over the city of Rochester.

14. From antiquasi:

I let a friend of a friend stay with me while she “got herself together” for a little over twice as long as originally intended. After going out of my way in the extreme, she walked out one evening without a word said with my grandmother’s silver place settings. Appreciation indeed.

15. From CrunchityFrog:

Rented out a mother-in-law space to a "single mom looking for a fresh start" in the eight months she lived there, she had three roommates she wasn't supposed to have (we evicted two of them), trashed the place to the point it cost us thousands of dollars to clean out her junk, and somehow broke the sink in the bathroom, which was the only source of water aside from the bathtub.

We ended up evicting her, and a year later she threatened to sue us for her stuff.

16. From DearQueenie:

A girl transferred into my school when we were 10, and bullied the sh*t out of everyone. She'd threaten the other kids, including me, not to tell on her, otherwise she'd make us regret it, and basically had a complete reign of terror over us. After about a year, I snapped and ended up being the one to tell the teacher everything she'd done and how she was treating us, and she got expelled. A lot of the other kids thanked me for turning her in, because I don't think it would have ended if someone hadn't, and we enjoyed the rest of our school years in peace.

9 years later, despite moving to a new town and getting an entirely new group of friends, the b*tch showed up out of nowhere and f*cked my boyfriend.

17. From Cadence_828:

I gave my mom a place to live and got her a job to help her get back on her feet.

She talked sh*t about me to all my coworkers, spreading lies and rumors, not realizing that my coworkers loved me and were telling me everything she said.

Then she stole >$1000 out of my bedroom by guessing my lock box combination.

18. From enchilada_slut:

I saw a man about my age drop his wallet, so I picked it up and tried to get his attention. His girlfriend turns around screaming at me that I'm "a dumb b**ch" and that "he's obviously taken you thirsty wh*re." So I just put the wallet on the ground in front of her and walked away from that mess.

19. From SugoiBakaMatt:

Wrote up the daughter of the head of HR at work for harassing/assaulting one of the newer employees. Got 3 consecutive write-ups the next day for being late by 2 minutes, missing an important e-mail that "accidentally" wasn't sent to me, and running out to my car on the clock to grab my inhaler. Normally 3 write-ups in the same month is automatic termination, the only reason I wasn't fired is because I was the only trainer in the Southeast U.S. And she was probably afraid I would sue.

Side-note: the head of HR had been fired from her previous job (also HR) for having sex with an employee in her office.

20. From f*ckgoldsendbitcoin:

At work I was on break while my coworker was covering my job. When I come back he says he was trying to receive our customers' packages in the system but something screwed up and asked if I could take a look at it while he went on his break. Said no problem. Turns out he fucked up on the steps and now we can't go back to fix it so I tell the manager the situation. I specifically didn't mention who caused it so that I didn't come off petty trying to blame someone. Next day they have all of us retrain on the process and made sure to tell everyone it's because I f*cked it up.

Is there anything more soul-crushingly embarrassing than being caught having sex by your parents?! Probably, but it's hard to think of anything that rivals the dreaded creaking of a doorknob only to reveal mom or dad aghast at your sexual activity.

While shenanigans of this nature are the subject of many humiliating movie scenes, they also go down in real life, and there are people who survive to tell the tale.

In a popular Reddit thread, people who've been walked in on by their parents share what went down, and the secondhand embarrassment is deep.

1. From Leoz46:

Mom walked in on me face deep in my junior prom date. The worst conversation of my life came shortly afterward.

2. From bangersnmash13:

Happened twice. First time was my brother when I was like 17-18. Wanted me to move my car, so he walked into my room. Blanket was over us, but I was on top of her when she walked in. He just said "Sorry." and closed the door. He profusely apologized later that day when I saw him again.

Second time was my Mom. She wanted to know if girlfriend was staying for dinner. Just walked in, flailed her arms around for a second and ran off faster than I've ever seen her run before. LEAVING THE DOOR OPEN. We just got up, got dressed and that was it. Mom never brought it up again.

3. From Jackscalibur:

My mom didn't say anything while we were doing it, but after I dropped off my girlfriend and returned home, she said: "you need to respect the people who are living in this house."

I immediately knew what she was talking about.

4. From ScurryBlackRifle:

One time in high school my girlfriend and I were at her house having sex and she was very loud about it because we were the only ones there. So we thought. After we were done we walk out to the living room and her dad was sitting on the couch and gave me a death stare I will never forget. He didn't say a word to either one of us and she told me he didn't talk to her for a week.

5. From baldbandersnatch:

In the moment it was very embarrassing. They were classy enough to step out of the house for 20 minutes to let us get our dignity back together. I took her home and got a stern "talking to" about protection. When the incident was brought up years later, they admitted that the real reason for stepping out was because they were trying not to bust their guts laughing. Apparently, they held their sh*t together until they got into the car and then started howling.

6. From Arythmanticist:

Lol I got a decent story... so first off, wasn’t caught in the action. Caught right after the action. And second, we were 16 so I know we didn’t make the brightest choices.

Girlfriend at 16 had a very religious family. They lived in the city so there was no driveway or anything to warn us that a parent was coming home. Her parents were out for the day and the GF and I were going to a movie that afternoon, so I drove over to pick her up. I got there a little early, so naturally, we used time wisely and had sex. Right after sex, doing our post-sex naked cuddle, we hear the front door start unlocking. We quickly get clothes on, done. Next, I’m not supposed to be upstairs in their house (again, very religious people and preach abstinence) and the stairs are right next to the front door so there’s no shot I’m making it down them unseen.

The first thought we have is for me to hide (dumb 16-year-old) so I get in the hallway closet. GF’s mom comes upstairs, sees her daughter and asks if she’s still waiting on me. The mom takes off her shoes, brings them over to the closet, opens the door, puts them literally on my toes, realizes they’re feet, looks up, sees my face, and releases a full-on comedy horror movie scream right in my face.

The three of us had a long conversation after which we pleaded that I was only waiting for the GF to get ready and new I wasn’t supposed to be upstairs so I hid. Obviously didn’t work.

Dated for another few months and now we’re still friends. We actually joke about it every so often. Her mom didn’t hold it against me in the long run.

TLDR; GF’s parents came home right after we had sex. I hid in a closet. The mom came and put her shoes in the closet and saw me. She screamed very loudly.

7. From TheRealClyde:

My GF at the times dad walked in said "HEY YALL GOT ANY WEED" then realized what he walked in on and said "AH SH*T YALL ARE F*CKIN" and then left the house.

8. From Sckaledoom:

A friend of mine that I had a crush on at the time had a dream to “be an amateur dentist” so when I had a loose tooth (we were 13 or 14) she really wanted to tear it out. To the point where she hopped on top of me on my bed with her hand in my mouth to tear it out.

I obviously resisted and was groaning because this was f*cking painful and my thrashing was making the bed creak a lot and my dad came up confused to see what was going on and when he saw a girl I had a crush on straddling me, our faces inches apart, he promptly said “be careful you two” and walked downstairs. To this day I think my father is convinced that he walked in on me about to have sex with this girl cause he always gets confused when I tell him I never had a chance with her.

9. From Mattxy8:

When I was 18 my girlfriend at the time and I were watching movies in my room, my grandma came by and knocked on my door before coming in to say hi.

She saw us asleep and FULLY CLOTHED. She chuckled, apologized and closed the door. I heard my grandma telling my mom that she walked in on me doing something "scandalous."

10. From jvcscasio:

My sister caught me getting a BJ once. She didn't knock before entering my room.

She saw what was happening, closed the door and left. Never talked about it ever again.

11. From SmallTowneBoy:

I snuck into my girlfriend’s room and stayed the night one time because I had nowhere else to go. Usually her mom leaves for work before everyone gets up for school, but this particular morning her mom came in to ask her something before leaving... yeah, I woke up to her mother screaming get out of her bed and ripping the blankets off, and of course I was butt naked. Her mom started acting like she was worried her teenage daughter would get pregnant all the time, and I kind of just avoided her mother for a while because I couldn’t look her in the eye.

So yeah, anyways, that’s the story of how my mother in law saw my dick when I was 15.

12. From Kopfkino123:

My mother had trouble starting her Vespa so she came into my room to ask me to start it for her. Which was uncomfortable because I was quite literally balls deep in my GF at that time. I hadn't locked the room because I thought my mother had left with her scooter. She just calmly asked how long it was going to take us and if I could pause and help her because she was late for work. It was more funny than awkward to be honest. But we always had a pretty open way of talking about that stuff.

13. From ckeaton:

I wasn’t caught but I snuck a girl over. We bumped uglies all night. She slept over and we slept nude. I didn’t really think how I’d sneak her out, just wait until my parents left became the plan. So we’re laying there nude, I’m awake she’s asleep. I hear the door to the basement, where my room was, open. I proceeded to grab her carry her to my closet, she looked terrified and confused, thank god she didn’t scream. Put her in my closet and grabbed underwear. Just after I put the underwear on my stepdad walks in.

The closet door was wide open and he stood in front of it to talk to me and I sat up on my bed, she just looked at him from the closet and to this day I don’t think he knows. Very close call but I think he’s clueless that on that morning there was a nude 16-year-old girl right behind. If he did notice he’s a legend for keep quiet to my mum and acting clueless.

14. From uuuuuhhhh_okay:

My high school girlfriend was on top and I wanted to be on top so I pushed her backwards. When she fell back she hit her head on the corner of my nightstand and immediately started bleeding. When she saw the blood she started screaming and crying. My mother and her friends came rushing in to save her. She wrapped up with the blanket so I'm just standing there at full mast with Susan eyeballing me.

My mother and I were always open about this sort of stuff so she knew we were having sex and it wasn't a big deal. She did tease me for a couple of weeks afterwards, pretending like I was abusive.

15. From TheAzrael2013:

Not my parents but her parents. I didn't know what to do or say when her mother walked in so I yelled out loud, "We were wrestling!" Very awkward.

16. From Dane-Direct:

A little awkward. Okay very awkward. Later my dad told me "just don't get pregnant."

17. From PrOwOfessor_OwOak:

My GF's mom caught us. She didn't barge in or anything but the next morning I woke up and went to the kitchen to get a drink.

Her mom was there but I didn't assume anything as she was supposed to be out late for work or something.

All she said was "I ended up not needing to work late. I'm glad you're taking care of my daughter"

I almost jumped out of the window in embarrassment.

18. From 420PineResin:

I wasn’t really caught, but I had my girlfriend over and we were watching a movie under the covers. Everyone was home so we kept it quiet and under the big comforter, we were cuddling pre-banging so we kept that position. Mom walks in and asks us if we wanted food from whatever place, as I’m still inside my girlfriend laying perfectly still. Was definitely a holy sh*t moment.

19. From theorginsofher:

They were his parents. He told me that they would be gone for a few hours...so I was loud. His mom opened the door and I was on top of him. No way I could possibly explain myself. She sighed and walked out. That was the last time I had sex with said guy.

20. From afewbaddecisions:

His mom just rolled her eyes and told us to put some clothes on.

We were doing it with his door open because he wasn't allowed to close it. (Yes, I know it's risky, but we'd gotten away with it a lot before.) After that day, however, we were given permission to close the door for that purpose only.

Most people love to give other people advice because saving someone else from a hilariously bad decision is much easier than facing any of our own mistakes or treasured delusions....

While there is definitely a solid amount of bad advice out there, every once in awhile you stumble upon a conversation that can seriously impact your life and choices. Life-changing advice unfortunately usually doesn't come in the form of a perfectly edited collage of motivation quotes on Instagram, though. Good advice is most often offered through honest conversation, constructive criticism, and being ready to actually receive it. That being said, never underestimate the power of a particularly moving bumper sticker or fortune cookie...

While we're inundated with an endless loop of "10 things you should do to be a rich, happy boss babe"-style articles and posts, the best advice usually comes into your life when you least expect it. So, when a recent Reddit user asked, "What is the best advice you have ever received? The advice that has impacted your life the most?" people were ready to share.

1.

"Use your vacation hours, and don't be afraid to call in sick every now and then either". No need to work like a dog and ignore your benefits to please a boss who doesn't notice. Vacation/staycation days are gems that everyone should take! - CBtheNomad

2.

When you're being too harsh on yourself, imagine if the person with those issues is one of your friends. Treat yourself like you'd treat that friend.

That helped me be way kinder to myself than before, really. - Evaguess

3.

My current boss says something as a joke that has helped me a lot more than he realizes, I am a mechanic but am not always the most confident (even when I know what I'm doing). He says "only one way to fix it, fix it." Weirdly enough it always makes me focus and remember there's no secret trick he knows that I dont, just got to do it. Applied that to other areas of my life and it helps so much more than I would have thought - gumbypunk95

4.

It's not what you say, but how you say it. Changing the way one phrases things can have an incredible effect. - TonyStark39

5.

Under promise and over deliver. - Ajegwu

6.

Marriage shouldn’t be a 50/50 split. It should be a 60/40 split where both are trying to be the 60%. - fluggelhorn

7.

Be the love you never received - yourboyethius524

8.

During my first internship, I was super keen to please my supervisors and was an eager little brown-noser. Anything they would ask me, I would respond with an enthusiastic yes and rush to do that, even with mindless things like, typing out someone's meeting notes, going out to buy office stationery, and even served coffee to some guests a couple of times, no matter how much I hated doing it.

Two months into the internship, the boss called me for a catch-up and bluntly described me as 'servile' to my face, and said that with my attitude, I would never grow professionally. He said, "it doesn't matter if you're an intern or a manager, if you do not get over your habit of wanting to please everyone, you'll never learn or achieve anything of value." Though I was shaken then and even hated him a little bit, I eventually came to realise the truth in his words. - nooooowhaatnooo

9.

Don't worry about whether or not you "belong" somewhere, or if you'll fit in. Do your part, respect and support others. If you do that and people don't accept you it's their problem not yours. - DownWithTotodile

10.

"Don't half a*s two things, whole a*s one thing."

I know, this is from Parks and Rec, but I applied it in my real life. I've had a bad habit of taking on too much and spreading myself too thin. Now I focus on one thing so that I can give the most to it (and get the most out of it). - PMMEYOURBOOBOVERFLOW

11.

“You can’t drive forward looking in the rear view mirror” funny enough the guy who told me this was a Drivers Ed teacher😂😂 - Bradzilla4383

12.

Nobody’s looking at you. They’re worrying about how they look. - the-keen-one

13.

"You cant tell who is swimming naked until the tide goes out" in reference to who is actually prepared when an emergency happens - alaskan_termite

14.

My Mum said this to me, "There is already a lot of hate in the world, you don't need to add to it". - Flashargh

15.

My grandpa told me this after I had moved in with my girlfriend and said living together was coming so easily:

It's not the person who is easy to live with, it's the person you can't live without.

We're married now. - Dayngerman

16.

If you are ashamed to tell people what you are doing, you shouldn’t be doing it. - LeeciXo

17.

“People aren’t against you, they are for themselves.” Always helps me put social situations in perspective. - MaryVanDerWindmill

18.

You’ve got to learn to leave the table when love’s no longer being served. - redshoesalphabet

Hot mess, dumpster fire, shit show. Whatever you call it, 2020 is not OK, you guys. This year has been disturbingly crazy, but at least there's still plenty to laugh at. All of 2020 can be hilariously summed up by these funny and accurate memes.

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"Mother Teresa didn’t walk around complaining about her thighs – she had shit to do."

-Sarah Silverman

We, women, are way too hard on ourselves. There's so much pressure on us to look perfect, act perfect and take care of everyone else perfectly while we're at it. Sometimes we just need to take a break and have a good belly laugh to get through the day. These hilariously relatable memes will definitely tickle your funny bone and brighten your mood.

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