Staten Island teacher Adriana Lopez was recently diagnosed with breast cancer. The school's amazing chorus gave her a special end of the year song.

How far into this did you make it before crying? I got about 30 seconds in. I recovered towards the end, then broke down when Mrs. Lopez started crying as she said she had great friends.

Also, this chorus is actually good! Usually, I'm very skeptical of children being used to manipulate me in viral stuff, but the chorus at PS 22 has been blowing the lid off YouTube since they started posting their videos. They even have lots of interactions with surprise celebrity guests. What I'm saying is, they did this for their teacher, not fame. I mean, they can get Carrie Underwood to stop by anytime.

We're wishing you a speedy and complete recovery, Mrs. Lopez! Get back to those kids, they love you.

Barack Obama (this guy who is the president) was on 'The Daily Show' last night.

The Daily Show

It was Obama's final interview with Jon Stewart, who is leavingThe Daily Show in August. (I think the President is also leaving office at some point soon. It seems like there's an election or something going on right now. Not sure, but I've been hearing murmurings.)

The President sat down for a long interview, and it got pretty real. But about politics, the media, and activism. Not, like, how Twitter feuds get real.

Obama spoke (seemingly) frankly about how the media is right to hold the President to a high standard, but does sometimes "get distracted by shiny objects." He also pointed out that it's not true that young people "have lost their idealism or are too cynical or ironic," which I was thrilled to hear him say because that can be a concept some older people fail to grasp. No offense to the President of the United States, who I just called "older."

The Daily Show

The Daily Show

It's heartening that even though the interview was pretty serious, Obama and Stewart took that brief moment at the end to laugh at Donald Trump.

James Minor wants an apology for how he was treated by a Bojangles' location after he tried to do the right thing.

"I'm honest. I know what integrity is. I have integrity."(via WTVR)

It's true what they say: no good deed goes unpunished. And when the punishment comes from a restaurant that served you cold chicken, that injustice is magnified a thousandfold.

On Friday, James Minor pulled up to the drive-thru at a Bojangles' Famous Chicken 'N Biscuits location in Henrico County, Virginia. When his fried chicken order came out, he noticed it was cold, so he asked for a fresh one. Then he was sucked into some sort of Hitchcockian drama.

Minor was asked to pull over and wait, and told his chicken would be ready in about seven minutes. When an employee brought it out to him, he checked it to make sure it was up to snuff. But when he looked in the bag, he saw that this order was also cold… cold hard cash. There was no food inside, just $4,500 and a bunch of deposit slips.

Minor immediately ran inside to tell a manager and return the money, but was shocked at the reaction he received. He described his interaction with the manager to WTVR:

“He told me in an arrogant, nasty attitude, being disrespectful, saying that, 'We would've called the authorities on you, too.' Here I am doing a good thing, bringing the money back. Most folks probably would've kept on going and wouldn't have recognized it until they got home."

And who knows if they would have returned it even then? Luckily, James Minor is a man of integrity, even though he had no idea what he had stumbled into. He suspected he might have been set up or gotten embroiled in some employee's attempt to steal money. It's not hard to understand his confusion. This place is sounding less like a Bojangles', and more like a Pollos Hermanos.

If you don't get the joke, watch Breaking Bad. Watch it anyway, it's great.
(AMC via Wikia)

Minor says that Bojangles' offered him a free meal for his good deed, and later a $100 gift certificate. But he doesn't want their hush money. As he told WTVR:

“I deserve respect, an apologetic letter from the Bojangles' company and probably a cash reward. What is a $100 gift certificate when you're bringing in $4,500?"

Regardless of how the Bojangles' corporate office responds, one thing is clear: they really need to keep a closer eye on that location. Their brand, normally associated with quality fried chicken at a reasonable price, is being sullied by this one franchise. What kind of place serves cold chicken, misplaces thousands of dollars, and treats good samaritans like criminals all in a single transaction? They're just asking to be torn apart on Yelp.

If you missed it, Nicki Minaj and Taylor Swift got into it on Twitter last night over the MTV Music Video Awards.

@NICKIMINAJ I've done nothing but love & support you. It's unlike you to pit women against each other. Maybe one of the men took your slot..
— Taylor Swift (@taylorswift13) July 21, 2015

In summary, Nicki Minaj thinks the reason her record-breaking video for "Anaconda" didn't get nominated for "Video of the Year" is because of the entertainment industry's racist double standards about white and black women's bodies. You see, Taylor Swift's hot blonde lady parade "Bad Blood" DID get nominated.

It's been an interesting night of Twitter conversations/rants/memes and freshly spilled bad blood.

Most people, however, are taking the VMAs about as seriously as they deserve, including Bruno Mars and Ed Sheeran:

Fanks for the 6 VMA nominations, I like moon men
— Ed Sheeran (@edsheeran) July 21, 2015

But they must have looked over at Minaj and Swift and wanted a piece of the hot, angry action:

Yo I want in on this twitter Beef!! VMAs is the new WWF!! @edsheeran Fuck You!
— Bruno Mars (@BrunoMars) July 22, 2015

Ed Sheeran responded, true to his nature as a fiery redhead:

@BrunoMars any way we do dis you gon' come up short
— Ed Sheeran (@edsheeran) July 22, 2015

Oh, Snap! Because Bruno Mars is short, get it?

Did we ever stop to think that Taylor might be too tall?!(via Getty)

Owie. Bruno doesn't want to play anymore:

That Cut deep..U always know how to sheer me to the core. I can't believe we're Sheeran this in public. How dare u! https://t.co/fdYOVnlScF— Bruno Mars (@BrunoMars) July 22, 2015

Sheeran showed he's a lyricist:

@BrunoMars but all my crew know that Bruno has eyebrows dat be uno. And plays Cluedo with SuBo, but you lose coz you blow
— Ed Sheeran (@edsheeran) July 22, 2015

Fans of both rallied to the cause:

@BrunoMars@edsheeran SAY NO MORE. Place yo bets people pic.twitter.com/VsSzsWuIoc
— Angelie Censon (@echosei_ACE) July 22, 2015

Or just wildly misunderstood what was happening and got angry themselves:

@ambitiontario bout to throw hands on bruno I ain't even playing Bruh I'm swinging— ariana loves tori (@allyswifey) July 22, 2015

Who knew the VMAs could kick up so much drama, both real and fake? Looking forward to more on this crazy imbroglio. Meanwhile, keep an eye on these celebrity social media accounts, they're full of gems:

Lol u guys did we miss the deadline?? #MTV?
A photo posted by Nicki Minaj (@nickiminaj) on Jul 21, 2015 at 11:45am PDT

Spoiler alert: This post contains spoilers, if you consider the location of actors in the world to be spoilers (they are).

"All men must appear in Season 6."(viaHBO)

Remember in the season finale of Game of Thrones when Jon Snow died? You remember. Then remember everyday since then, when the Internet observed actor Kit Harrington's every little move and speculated wildly about what it means regarding Jon Snow's deadness or aliveness? (I'm includingmyself in that, obviously.)

This week, there's a new theory arguing that Jon Snow isn't actually dead. And it's a lot more compelling than his haircut.

According to GoT fan site Watchers on the Wall, Kit Harington has been spotted in Belfast, Ireland. You know, the place in Northern Ireland where Game of Thrones is filmed.

Kit Harington is in Belfast AGAIN; plus, Irish actor joins Game of Thrones http://t.co/Ka389PuBzg#gameofthronespic.twitter.com/J9snWHg4bB
— Watchers on the Wall (@WatchersOTWall) July 21, 2015

He was even on the same flight to Belfast as Jaqen H'ghar (or at least someone wearing his face), and filming for the next season is supposed to start this week. I mean...you don't exactly have to be a Red Priestess to see what's going to happen.

As Watchers on the Wall acknowledges, there could be reasons for Harington to be in Belfast even if Jon Snow is planning to stay dead forever. But they're not likely.

Is it possible Harington is there to simply film a funeral/play a dead body? Technically. But considering how many visits he's had to Belfast in the past couple months of pre-production, I find it very difficult to believe. Harington has also refused to take photos with any fans in Belfast recently, according to several Twitter mentions.

Well, I think we can all agree that Jon Snow is as good as warged into a wolf's body until Melisandre uses blood magic to resurrect him. But I will continue to enjoy the straight up lies that Kit Harington is probably contractually obligated to tell for the next year.

Forget everything you thought you knew about human water balloons.

Gav and Dan, the Slow Mo Guys, have taken YouTube by storm with their super slow motion videos. Using a $150,000 high speed camera, they film explosions, implosions, and everything in between – then they slow the footage down hundreds of times over. Their beautiful HD videos shed fascinating light on the physics behind everyday moments.

But now, it looks like they've run out of everyday moments, because this one is just weird. Four years ago, they filmed themselves popping a 6-foot water balloon. Now, in an impressive feat of grasping for straws, they filmed the same thing, but with one of them inside. It was up to Dan to be the human balloon.

The look on his face when the balloon pops unexpectedly is almost as good as the pop itself. Seeing his shock slowly grow is a real treat. I don't care if the two of them have run out of ideas, these weird videos are their best yet. Keep it up, guys!

Not everyone has the looks for a sexy facial composite.

"Babe, are you saying I look like a greyscale drawing?" (via Distractify)

Distractify had couples describe each other to a police sketch artist, and it resulted in some pretty awesome schadenfreude. At first the women describe the men, and then vice versa. With metaphors such as an "upside-down egg," a "ferret," and a "poor man's Eva Mendes" being used to describe the participants' facial features, no one holds back. Maybe their brutal honesty is a sign of love? Yeah, let's just pretend that's what's happening.

Khloé Kardashian is getting her own TV show. Can you believe it? Probably.

Excited to announce my new talk show "Kocktails with Khloé" on the @FYI network!! Can't wait to show you all what we have in store for you on the show. More to come soon!
A photo posted by Khloé (@khloekardashian) on Jul 21, 2015 at 10:03am PDT

Khloé announced the new show through a photo posted on Instagram, because that's how announcements are announced now! The pic is in the selfie style, but was clearly taken by someone else, as proven by her arm configuration. She is drinking a glass of wine, and in addition to some hen, wine, and martini emojis, the caption reads:

Excited to announce my new talk show "Kocktails with Khloé" on the FYI network!! Can't wait to show you all what we have in store for you on the show. More to come soon!

What do you think the show is about? Alcohol and chatting? Or would it be khatting? Either way, I like both of those things. I mean "both those khings." I mean "koth khose khings." I mean, "k."

North Carolina is introducing a pilot program to let high schoolers take PE from home.

There's no "i" in "team," but there is in "iPad."(stock photo)

When I was in high school, I hated gym. Being forced to compete, the teacher shouting at me to "hustle," changing in the locker room with the other boys… it was a daily nightmare. I was a chubby, unathletic kid way out of my element. But if I had been able to take gym at home, using a computer, I would have been much, much happier. And at least twice as chubby.

North Carolina's Virtual Public School, a service that lets kids in the state take courses not offered by their local school system, is testing a revolutionary idea: virtual gym. In case you're imaging someone wearing a VR headset and doing jumping jacks, don't worry. It's not nearly that cool. According to the press release, here's how it will work:

“Teachers will provide video demonstration of a physical activity or sport, then students will practice those skills and build their own video portfolios to document their progress and display mastery."

Finally, a non-creepy reason for teenagers to film themselves exercising and send it to an adult. It seems like this system would work well for exercises, but not so much for team sports. Have you ever played basketball by correspondence? It takes forever.

If you're wondering why the state would want to do this, that's an excellent question. It could be used by students who need to catch up on credits, or for “pre-professional athletes with rigorous athletic training demands that require an alternate academic schedule." Oh, now I get it. They're just doing this to be able to micromanage the development of future North Carolina college sports stars. I knew there was an ulterior motive.

The program will launch in Macon and New Hanover counties this fall. If it's successful, the rest of the state will follow. Then a generation of awkward kids like me will be spared the humiliation of gym class. Unless someone leaks their exercise videos. Then it'll be much worse.

All the other divers are lined up like, "When's it my turn?"

"I don't know if you're a boy or a girl but that wetsuit is bangin'"

This video was recently posted to the Facebook community Ocean Reality, which may now be my favorite place to go mellow out and watch seahorses swim around. It was originally filmed by Julián Bala, though I don't know if that's him getting all the kisses.

He also has this cool vid of a diver playing with a Mama or Papa sea lion, scratching their bellies with a makeshift tool. Delightful!

Bad news though: sea lions can be very aggressive and dangerous, so if one is swimming quickly at your face do not assume it wants kisses. It probably wants fish or to bite your face, whichever comes first.

At least they're not sharks!

1 in 5 residents of Ottawa, Canada are on the site. Not 1 in 5 married residents. 1 in 5 of ALL residents. It gets even worse once you really crunch the numbers.

The Canadian Parliament, aka the Great Northern Boner.

Oh, Canada! America's polite little sibling who never fully moved out of mother England's basement is turning out to be a real freak in the bedroom. That's right, not only is Avid Life Media (parent company of cheating website Ashley Madison and sugar daddy site Established Men) itself Canadian, but its most popular market is none other than the capital of the Great White North, Ottawa. An unbelievable 189,810 of the city's 883,391 residents (as of 2011) had profiles on the site. That's 21.5% of the population (which has probably grown since then, so let's just call it 20%) in the city that is home to Canada's Parliament and federal government.

Related: How Ashley Madison ruined my reputation (on purpose) long before the hack.

Lets break this down further. 18.9% of Ottawa's population is under 15, which adds up to 166,961 kids. I assume Canadians don't get married until at least 18, but whatever, they only count kids under 15. This leaves us with 716,430 Ottawans over 15. In 2001, for the first time in history, the percentage of Canadians over 15 who were married fell below 50%. So, let's be conservative and say that rate has only fallen to 45% since then.

That leaves 322394 married Ottawans—probably fewer. THAT MEANS AT LEAST 58.8% OF MARRIED OTTAWANS WERE ON ASHLEY MADISON. THAT MEANS THOUSANDS OF COUPLES HAD BOTH SPOUSES ON THE SITE.

Related: In (dis)honor of Ashley Madison, here's the best of partners getting caught cheating on other networks.

Why, you ask? Not generally, "WHY?!" but, "Why Ottawa?" Well, the short answer is that politicians and the lobbyists who own them are supposed to be married, whether or not that marriage is happy. Even if you're not actually an elected official, working in a government town often requires presenting a traditionally successful image—and that includes a stable marriage (and not an open one). “In our buttoned-down city, it may not be acceptable to openly explore outside of a committed relationship," said Ottawa marriage counselor Nataxja Cini to the New York Post.

It's a small town where everyone is either political or blue collar—you can't just go to a dive bar to pick up some anonymous tail when everyone in town either went to high school together or are determined to destroy the other half in the next election.

The rates of cheating increase with the proximity to power: the top zip code for cheaters in Ottawa is the residential district right next to Parliament Hill. A lot of people are predicting a bunch of awkward conversations at dinner tables in Ottawa this week, but after crunching the numbers and realizing that there must be thousands of couples where both spouses were on the site, I think those awkward conversations happened a long time ago. Maybe all those cheating power couples will go on a relaxing trip out of town to have affairs in a more exciting city.

"Why do you think everyone goes to Montreal to have a good time?" 38-year-old Katy told the Post,“Ottawa is the city fun forgot."

Sooooo, here's some news: XENA IS MAKING A COMEBACK TO NBC IN 2016! AIR HORN! AIR HORN!!!!

I just realized that Argo the horse is probably dead by now.(via Getty)

Let's try to keep a level head, everyone! *runs in circles for half an hour, passes out briefly, wakes up, eats a salad, cautiously approaches computer, blacks out again, comes to while writing this post*

Deep breath...According to The Hollywood Reporter,Xena: Warrior Princess is coming back to NBC. If you're a fan, you probably know that Xena was originally a spinoff of Hercules, after appearing as a love interest for Kevin Sorbo for a few episodes. Her character was so popular they decided actress Lucy Lawless could definitely carry a franchise. And f*ck yeah she could! The show aired from 1995-2001, at which point our heroine succumbed to the one ailment she'd always been able to bounce back from before: death.

Which has us asking: will Lucy Lawless be back? Obviously, no one else can be Xena except Lucy Lawless. And if you haven't seen her lately, she's still looking fly as hell:

Return to me!(via Getty)

Here's what she said in an interview with HitFixduring Comic-Con:

"I've been pitching that show … because … there's a swell of interest still. I'm always being peppered with questions [about] when the Xena movie is coming. Guys, I'm pitching my ass off to make it happen, whether it's with me or not. I think it'd be funny to have a reboot like Ash vs. Evil Dead— like middle-aged Xena in a muumuu with a bad attitude and a smoking habit. … Bring [actor] Ted Raimi [who played Joxer] in … [and maybe] Bruce Campbell.

"I don't know what the hold-up is; it's about who has got the rights. But that's a piss-poor excuse anymore. Find who has got the rights, freakin' pay it. It's better to have 80 percent of something than 100 percent of nothing. Don't waste this opportunity; reinvigorate that franchise! It's an insane, international character. They're fools not to bring it back. It's funny, it's sexy, it's action."

Yes, yes, yes to all that. Thank you, Lord, that someone finally took this gorgeous woman's advice! Original executive producers Rob Tapert (who is also Lawless' husband, so she has an "in" there) and Sam Raimi are involved, and it's looking like it might happen in 2016. I guess that means I better brush off my cosplay costume, huh?

Gabrielle's identity has been concealed for my protection. I'm afraid what she'd do to me if she saw this. (via Me)

There's a joke teasing Anne Hathaway in Amy Schumer's new movie, Trainwreck. But that didn't stop Hathaway from Instagramming her love for the film.

(World's Tiniest Spoiler Alert) In the movie, Amy tells her BF, who is carrying around a charity award he just won, that he's acting like Anne Hathaway on Oscar night. Zing.

Hathaway posted her ticket stub from the movie and wrote:

Dear @AmySchumer,
Don't pretend like when you win your Oscar- which you could for your brilliant and refreshing writing and/or acting in @TrainwreckMocie- you won't tote it around to every Oscar party you go to.
Way to slay,
Annie

What a casual sign-off. The entire note is very lighthearted and fun, which is typical of Anne Hathaway's public persona ever since we forced her to be that way by acting like hateful monsters who criticized everything about her. Only in Hollywood would a woman have to purposefully stop doing her job for a while because people weren't into her perfect vibe. I'm glad Annie is back, and I hope we can all try to respect her even though she's a really good actor who is in a lot of movies.

Schumer responded to Hathaway's note by throwing Judd Apatow under the bus.

I love you Anne Hathaway. I have no problem selling out and telling you that that was @JuddApatow s joke he made me say! #truth
— Amy Schumer (@amyschumer) July 21, 2015

I believe Amy! I stand with Annie! Oscars to carry around all night for everybody!

Does this make you... excited?

These didn't make it to Snapchat so here you are Instagram
A video posted by King Kylie (@kyliejenner) on Jul 19, 2015 at 12:21am PDT

Honestly, the most interesting thing about this video to me, is that Snapchat ranks higher than Instagram in the hierarchy of social media platforms to jiggle your boobs on. THIS didn't make it to Snapchat? What did?!

It's also funny how little two famous young women have to do to get people panting. There's barely anything to that dance! They just rock back and forth in their seats a little and almost lick their thumbs. Anyway, famous people are just like us: when they get tipsy they think they're Beyoncé in "Single Ladies."

Rachel Dolezal is standing firm on blackface.

At least, she is now that she's had some time to reflect on it and perhaps realize the only way out is through. It's been a while since the story of a white woman posing as a black woman (and accepting money and jobs under that pretext) broke, after she was outed by her parents in a local newspaper. She's had time to recoup and think strategy.

Here's what she said this week in an exclusive interview with Vanity Fair:

“It's not a costume. I don't know spiritually and metaphysically how this goes, but I do know that from my earliest memories I have awareness and connection with the black experience, and that's never left me. It's not something that I can put on and take off anymore. Like I said, I've had my years of confusion and wondering who I really [was] and why and how do I live my life and make sense of it all, but I'm not confused about that any longer. I think the world might be — but I'm not."

The thing is though, she can take it off. Especially the incredible hair! Her hair has even been her meal-ticket, since she lost her job as chapter president of the Spokane NAACP and as a teacher of Africana Studies at the local university. It seems like her skill with weaves transcends all racial prejudice.

There was a time when she wasn't able to pull the trigger on this identity, on public record at least:

Considering the very real, pressing issues facing the African-American community, Dolezal's bizarre claims probably rank low on anyone's list of things to give a f*ck about. Especially when she still just sounds confused as hell.

“I don't know. I just feel like I didn't mislead anybody; I didn't deceive anybody.If people feel misled or deceived, then sorry that they feel that way, but I believe that's more due to their definition and construct of race in their own minds than it is to my integrity or honesty, because I wouldn't say I'm African American, but I would say I'm black, and there's a difference in those terms."

She also sounds like she's saying "sorry, not sorry" about the whole accepting money and positions based on her race, which she lied about. Sorry if you believed my lies, everybody, but that's on you!

If you're intrigued by Rachel Dolezal's ideas and would like subscribe to her newsletter, you'll be happy to hear she is currently working on a book .

This adorable little girl totally lost her cool when she saw a puppy in her house. Major party foul.

Listen, everyone is excited to get a new puppy. If I were in this girl's shoes, you think I wouldn't want to squeal and collapse to the ground in tears? I wouldn't, because I've got a rep to protect.

I know she'll take good care of that dog, and she'll have to. It might be her only friend once this video goes viral on the playground. Sorry kid, I've got to be real.

The flag will be flown at half-stiff.

Was it ever not trendy? (via Tengaman/YouTube)

You know how we have National Pancake Day in America? Well, Japan has something similar, but instead of pancakes, it's with hand jobs. The Japanese sex toy company Tenga has deemed tomorrow national "Hand Job Day." Similar to how free Slurpee day falls on July 11th (7/11, i.e. seven-eleven), they're using the numbers of the date as a marketing strategy:

The reason is that “masturbation" in Japanese is “onanii" (オナニー), which is a pun on 07.21 (“o" for “zero"; “na" for “seven" or “nana" in Japanese; “ni" means “two" in Japanese; and here, they're making a pun on the long vowel mark “ー" by saying it refers to “一" or “ichi," which means “one.") So, “Jerk Off Day" is probably more accurate

Okay, I get it, but "Hand Job Day" sounds funnier so I'm gonna keep calling it that. Tenga didn't just make a holiday out of it, however; Hand Job Day also has a mascot, "Tengaman:"

He's the hero masturbation deserves, but not the one it needs right now. (via Tenga)

He's pretty much a Power Ranger who fights bad guys who are, uh, against hand jobs? I actually have no idea. Tengaman has his own movie trailer, but it's really confusing:

Yes, that is a man jerking off a Dr. Pepper can. (via Tengaman/YouTube)

That guy is about to use a Fleshlight like it's the key to saving the world while epic music plays in the background. (via Tengaman/YouTube)

The masked bandits symbolize society's sexual mores. (via Tengaman/YouTube)

Mighty Morphin Mastur-Bators. (via Tengaman/YouTube)

Let's hope American companies don't try to compete; the idea of a PornHub Man is truly terrifying.