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Sorry a guy hiding from the government for leaking classified information has...

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Today's 2 User Cards With the Worst Grasp of the English Language

Mars: come for the rock, stay for the dirt. Looks like we're taking a trip to space in this installment of Today's User Cards With the Worst Grasp of the English Language.Blast off >>

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I'm not worried about the NSA seeing my personal information since I already...

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It's so comforting to know I have a friend to share the same mental health...

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The last time I visited a gym, a white guy was President.

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Poll: Majority of Americans who really have no choice in the matter support...

Read the full article at TheGist.com >>

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There's nothing like watching cat videos to help me pass the time until I can...

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My kid having head lice is a great opportunity to practice my...

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For Father's Day my gift to you is admitting that your long-standing paranoia...

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Happy Father's Day to a man who has been monitoring my cell phone usage much...

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Thanks for still wanting to have sex with me after seeing human beings emerge...

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Last night's sex would've cost me $4,500 with a prostitute.

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7 ways to admit you're an even creepier stalker than the NSA.

"Sometimes I 'Unlike' your pictures just to 'Like' them again." Sure, the NSA has been rifling through all your emails, phone records, and private data, but are you really much better? Aren't you also...

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May your birthday attract less obnoxious Internet hype than an Apple...

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Today's 3 User Cards With the Worst Grasp of the English Language: Father's...

Yes, all fathers hate peace and quiet on Father's Day. It's all about the dads on today's installment of the User Cards With the Worst Grasp of the English Language.Check 'em out >>

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If you were Jesus, today would be Christmas.

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8 ways you can express your complete addiction to Apple products.

Unless it can enhance the size and quality of my dick pics or let's me eat the food I'm photographing. It's been a big week for Apple addicts to get their fix. At the Worldwide Developers Conference...

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This is my favorite day of the week to break my feeble vow to never drink again.

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I will complain about my privacy being invaded by the government right after...

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25 dads being ridiculously embarrassing on Facebook.

Before Facebook, you went through five key stages in your relationship with your father. He held you in the hospital when you were born, you competed with him for your mother's love, you accidentally...

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