Dog accidentally runs half marathon. Could've won if she hadn't stopped to smell a dead rabbit.

January 25, 2016, 10:55 am

≫ Next: Map shows the craziest law in every state, lets you know where you can't wear a fake mustache.

≪ Previous: Single people are sharing how they look on Tinder vs. how they look while swiping.

Most people train before running a half marathon, but Ludivine is not a person. The dog from Elkmont, Alabama went outside on January 16 after her owner, April Hamlin, opened the door, Hamlin told Runner's World. Ludivine then wandered off to the starting point of the Trackless Train Trek Half Marathon. Once the race started, Ludivine joined in.

https://www.facebook.com/werunhsv/photos/a.1011309972248599.1073741830.874632512583013/1011318772247719/?type=3&theater

Straying from the path only to check out yards or, in one instance, sniff a dead rabbit, Ludivine finished the 1.31-mile race in 1:32:56.

https://www.facebook.com/1647029648910689/photos/a.1669304200016567.1073741830.1647029648910689/1669303913349929/?type=3&theater

After crossing the finish line, Ludivine slowed down and hung around. At that point, volunteers awarded a medal to the dog, who came in seventh place out of 165 official runners.

https://www.facebook.com/1647029648910689/photos/a.1647543732192614.1073741826.1647029648910689/1668937633386557/?type=3

Hamlin figured out where her two-and-half-year-old dog was when friends started sending her pictures from the race. At first she was "embarrassed and worried" that Ludivine had disrupted the race. She was also surprised. "She’s laid back and friendly," Hamlin said of her dog, "so I can’t believe she ran the whole half marathon because she’s actually really lazy." Hamlin can never say that about her marathon-running pup again.

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Map shows the craziest law in every state, lets you know where you can't wear a fake mustache.

January 25, 2016, 11:40 am

≫ Next: What a trip.

≪ Previous: Dog accidentally runs half marathon. Could've won if she hadn't stopped to smell a dead rabbit.

A map compiled by Olivet Nazarene University reveals the most ridiculous laws on the books in each state. For example, the god- and law-fearing citizens of the state of Alabama are forbidden from wearing fake mustaches in church just in case they would cause laughter, and sneaky teens in Illinois can drink if they're underage just as long as they are enrolled in a culinary program. The good people up in Maine actually enacted a genius decree—making it illegal to have Christmas decorations still up after January 14th.

The map serves as a good reminder that the United States can be very, very weird.

Many of the M and N states are worried about sneaky animals:

The states at the end of the alphabet, meanwhile, are very concerned with body parts, be it selling eyes or biting limbs:

Of course, there are many funny and creative ways to organize these United States. The United States of Kevin will show you the most famous dude named Kevin from your zone, the United States of Emoji displayed popular emoticons, and the United States of STDs revealed how crusty Arizona is.

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What a trip.

January 25, 2016, 12:03 pm

≫ Next: If you ever wanted to see Mark Zuckerburg's naked, hairy chest, today's your day.

≪ Previous: Map shows the craziest law in every state, lets you know where you can't wear a fake mustache.

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If you ever wanted to see Mark Zuckerburg's naked, hairy chest, today's your day.

January 25, 2016, 12:05 pm

≫ Next: For once, a breastfeeding at work photo goes viral because of the employer’s support.

≪ Previous: What a trip.

Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg posted a picture of him swimming with his infant daughter, and while she is an adorable billionaire baby, you know why you're really here: to check out Mark Zuckerberg's shirtless, pale, freckly, patchy-haired chest. Well, here you go, you sick freak:

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10102614874143051&set=a.529237706231.2034669.4&type=3&theater

And here is a link to an image search for "Jesse Eisenberg shirtless," for comparison. Eisenberg played Zuckerberg in the movie The Social Network, but (fun fact) did not wear a merkin on his chest for the role.

Also, yes, Zuckerberg can be topless on Facebook but your breastfeeding photos might get flagged for nudity. Sorry.

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For once, a breastfeeding at work photo goes viral because of the employer’s support.

January 25, 2016, 12:15 pm

≫ Next: The 'Friends' cast reunited. Could this be their day, their week, their month, or even their year?

≪ Previous: If you ever wanted to see Mark Zuckerburg's naked, hairy chest, today's your day.

This photo of a breastfeeding firefighter posted by an Australian volunteer fire department is going viral right now (with just over 3,000 shares and 32,000 likes), because, duh. It's the most important and inspirational testament to how new mothers are capable of performing any job they choose that the Internet has seen since that breastfeeding cop who saved a baby with her boob last week.

https://www.facebook.com/cfavic/photos/a.456802769415.241316.7390614415/10153976690019416/?type=3&theater

Oh, and in case you're wondering if the child was in the vicinity of a burning house when this picture was taken, relax. "Just to clarify, this photo of Angela, a proud mum and CFA volunteer, was taken at a community event," the fire department wrote on their Facebook page. "No fires nearby and a safe environment for her child."

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The 'Friends' cast reunited. Could this be their day, their week, their month, or even their year?

January 25, 2016, 12:27 pm

≫ Next: This weekend, these ridiculously cute sea otters became ridiculously cute snow otters.

≪ Previous: For once, a breastfeeding at work photo goes viral because of the employer’s support.

On Sunday, NBC taped a star-studded special program called Must See TV: A Tribute to James Burrows, and the guest list for the show honoring the legendary TV director seems like it was all VIP. In fact, the holy moment predicted by Nostradamus finally came to pass: The Friends cast was reunited! Oh, wait, Matthew Perry's not there. Forget it, no prophecies have been fulfilled. But Jennifer Aniston, David Schwimmer, Lisa Kudrow, Matt LeBlanc, and Courteney Cox were there! Perry was working on a play in London, and pre-taped his tribute to Burrows separately. In this picture, 5 out of 6 friends were joined by key players from The Big Bang Theory, so that almost makes up for it:

https://www.instagram.com/p/BA85NG8OWQL/

Their smiles say, "We're happy to be reunited," but their eyes say, "Not everyone here was invited to Jennifer's wedding."

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This weekend, these ridiculously cute sea otters became ridiculously cute snow otters.

January 25, 2016, 12:50 pm

≫ Next: Denise Richards: Charlie Sheen called our 10-year-old daughter 'pig whore' and threatened murder.

≪ Previous: The 'Friends' cast reunited. Could this be their day, their week, their month, or even their year?

A record-breaking blizzard pounded the East Coast this past weekend, and both humans and animals made the best of the sudden winter wonderland. Not even Steven Tyler wanted to miss a thing during the Snowmageddon. While a panda playing in the snow at the National Zoo may have been the first snowy animal to capture the hearts of the Internet after the storm, these otters in North Carolina give Tian Tian the panda a run for his money.

Meet Oscar and Nova, two sea otters (now snow otters!) at the Grandfather Mountain wildlife sanctuary in Linville, North Carolina:

Oscar and Nova: Snow Otters
Grandfather Mountain is still closed, due to this weekend's snow. All hands are on deck, though, working to get the park open for the coming week. Well, all hands and webbed feet, that is.Video by Alexis Rowe | Grandfather Mountain Stewardship Foundation
Posted by Grandfather Mountain on Sunday, January 24, 2016

Luna the Otter also had fun, even though she was by herself. Did Oscar and Nova ditch her? Classic otter gossip fodder.

Luna's Snow Day
River otters love playing in snow, often sliding around on their bellies — as Luna is more than happy to demonstrate.Video by Alexis Rowe | Grandfather Mountain Stewardship Foundation
Posted by Grandfather Mountain on Sunday, January 24, 2016

It's so cute to see these otters in the snow, even though the river being frozen kind of messes up their home. But nothing can bother the otter.

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Denise Richards: Charlie Sheen called our 10-year-old daughter 'pig whore' and threatened murder.

January 25, 2016, 1:03 pm

≫ Next: A Kansas senator wrote dress code for women and not men because women need help dressing themselves.

≪ Previous: This weekend, these ridiculously cute sea otters became ridiculously cute snow otters.

A lawsuit filed by model and actress Denise Richards against ex-husband and father of her children Charlie Sheen claims his daughters are scared to be alone with him after he allegedly sent a series of abusive texts threatening to kill them and their mother, according to Page Six. It's not an outrageous claim, considering Sheen once sent abusive Tweets her way in full view of the public. This certainly threatens to deplete any and all goodwill Sheen has accumulated in recent weeks from the revelation of his struggle with HIV.

https://twitter.com/NYDailyNews/status/690369584755576832

The $1.2 million suit, filed last week, accuses Sheen of texting his 10 year-old daughter Lola: “Your dad is a rock star genius . . . Your mom is a p–s wart.” Name-calling between daddy and mommy is bad enough, but Charlie also allegedly called the pre-teen a “[bleeping] pig whore” while yelling, “I’m going to kill you and I’m going to kill your mom.”

Sheen maintains he only wanted to call Richards those names, and that it's her fault for not letting him have unsupervised visits with the kids. One can only imagine why she wouldn't want to leave her kids alone with that hot mess.

This battle isn't likely to be resolved anytime soon, if Richards' tweets directed at Sheen's lawyer yesterday are any indication:

https://twitter.com/DENISE_RICHARDS/status/691334314206765056

“It’s volatile,” a source told Page Six, “They’re afraid. They obviously love their dad, but they don’t feel comfortable. Stuff like that doesn’t go away overnight. They don’t want to be alone with him.”

Stories about Charlie Sheen were way more fun when he was just going around yelling, "winning" and "tiger blood." Hell, even Sheen's insane unlicensed doctor in Mexico injecting himself with Sheen's HIV+ blood to "prove" he had cured the actor was more fun than this.

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A Kansas senator wrote dress code for women and not men because women need help dressing themselves.

January 25, 2016, 1:15 pm

≫ Next: Danny DeVito points out that the Oscars are racist because the country is racist.

≪ Previous: Denise Richards: Charlie Sheen called our 10-year-old daughter 'pig whore' and threatened murder.

Mitch Holmes, a Kansas senator and chairman of the Senate Ethics and Elections Committee, is gaining attention for an 11-point code of conduct he wrote for people testifying on ethics bills and elections, CNN reports. Rule number two reads, "Conferees should be dressed in professional attire. For ladies, low-cut necklines and miniskirts are inappropriate." There is no equally vague mention of how a man should dress.

https://twitter.com/KansasDems/status/690296542188580864

Senator Laura Kelly summarized emotions when she told KWCH, "I think my first thought was, 'For crying out loud, what century is this?'"

Holmes reportedly toyed with requiring men to wear suits and ties, but according to the Huffington Post, felt that they were able to appropriately dress themselves without guidance.

https://twitter.com/Fearguth/status/690927582531887105

Holmes wrote the three-year-old dress code after a "full-time lobbyist appeared before a committee with a neckline that extended downward almost to her naval," he wrote on Facebook. His entire explanation is likely to only infuriate further:

It must have been a slow week for news reporters at the capitol. A particular reporter, one known for not joining in the pledge of allegiance, decided to make an issue of the committee rules I use. It was one of those deals that is so ridiculous that I rolled my eyeballs in disbelief of the spin he used. Here’s what the rule says: “Conferees should be dressed in professional attire. For ladies, low cut necklines and mini-skirts are inappropriate”. Headline reads: “Kansas Senate chairman's rules block female witnesses in revealing attire”. Since when did asking for professional attire become controversial enough to make headlines? This is the third year that rule has been in place and suddenly its front page news.
First off, nobody has ever been blocked. Stating expectations and blocking are two different things, but “block” is an emotionally charged term, so it was chosen for a headline. I learned in high school journalism class that writing headlines is a skill to catch peoples’ attention with few words. Emotional words are the best tools to make something sensational.
Second, these rules aren’t sent out to people requesting to speak. Lobbyists are the only people I have observed taking a copy of the rules when presented in the opening days of the session.
Several years ago, a paid, full-time lobbyist appeared before a committee with a neckline that extended downward almost to her naval! This was totally inappropriate for the context. I added this rule out of respect for the other women in the room, and out of respect for the wives of the men in the room, including my own wife.

Here's an eye roll for you, Senator Holmes.

Holmes's generous consideration for women has impressed no one:

https://twitter.com/amberversola/status/690540873528946689https://twitter.com/TJBrown911/status/690430617398325248https://twitter.com/KCMidtowner/status/690978565479739392

Given the public ire and dissatisfaction of female senators, it's looking like Holmes's code of conduct may be stepping into the 21st-century soon.

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Danny DeVito points out that the Oscars are racist because the country is racist.

January 25, 2016, 1:30 pm

≫ Next: Why did the lost sloth cross the road in Ecuador? Who cares, the rescue photos are adorable!

≪ Previous: A Kansas senator wrote dress code for women and not men because women need help dressing themselves.

In an interview at the Sundance Film Festival, Danny DeVito voiced his opinion on the Oscars diversity issue, and like Whoopi Goldberg and Nick Cannon, he thinks the problem is much larger than this particular awards show.

“It’s unfortunate that the entire country is a racist country…" he said, “Even though some people have given really great performances in movies, they weren’t even thought about. We’re living in a country that discriminates, and has certain racist tendencies.”

DeVito discussed the issue further with The Daily Beast, adding:

There were some good performances by people of color, and yeah, it’s blatant. We do live in a racist country. We have to evolve and have to realize that truth and reconciliation is here, too—it’s not only in South Africa or Cambodia. Young people have to learn what happened in our history, and we need people to know that we’re walking on the boards of genocide.

He contextualized the country's racist history by pointing out that racist entitlement was literally how the country began:

This is a place where people settled in and they came to be called Native Americans. Now all of a sudden these big ships appear out of the blue like demons in the daylight, and everything changed. Genocide happened and we’re all in it. But we can’t lean on that xenophobia. We need to understand what happened and realize that we’re all human beings who are cut from the same cloth.

You can watch Danny DeVito, Don Cheadle, and Sam Neill discusshow the industry needs to change here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GJV2BQJamZk

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Why did the lost sloth cross the road in Ecuador? Who cares, the rescue photos are adorable!

January 25, 2016, 1:30 pm

≫ Next: A woman grinding on a bored Waka Flocka Flame is the most mortifying thing you'll see today.

≪ Previous: Danny DeVito points out that the Oscars are racist because the country is racist.

Well, it finally happened: the Transit Commission of Ecuador has figured out how to become social media superstars. They've struck digital oil in the form of this sloth, the latest in a series of sloth stars to slither into the tubes of the Internet. His rise to fame came after he wandered onto a highway and took refuge on a guardrail post. Thank goodness officials were there to rescue him from the road, clinging for sweet life:

https://www.facebook.com/ctecuador/photos/a.841491329198047.1073741835.124370380910149/1256469514366891/?type=3&theater

It's okay. They had a veterinarian check out the sloth before releasing it to the wild.

https://www.facebook.com/ctecuador/photos/a.841491329198047.1073741835.124370380910149/1256469607700215/?type=3&theater

Sloth!

https://www.facebook.com/ctecuador/photos/pcb.1256469624366880/1256469424366900/?type=3&theater

Sorry, you can't keep him.

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A woman grinding on a bored Waka Flocka Flame is the most mortifying thing you'll see today.

January 25, 2016, 1:53 pm

≫ Next: This little girl giving herself a haircut will remind you why bangs are always a bad idea.

≪ Previous: Why did the lost sloth cross the road in Ecuador? Who cares, the rescue photos are adorable!

Someone recently filmed a woman spastically trying to dance with the rapper Waka Flocka Flame while he stood by completely motionless, and it will make you feel embarrassed for a beautiful blonde woman in ways you never have before. Even discounting the faint possibility that it might have been some kind of pre-planned stunt (the woman in the video may be comedian Kate Quigley), it reaches levels of cringe-worthiness heretofore unseen outside of a Curb Your Enthusiasm episode:

https://www.facebook.com/wakaflocka/videos/vb.106917292698829/1157546034302611/?type=2&theater

Everyone stands around uncomfortably and just does nothing, just like you would. Just like you're probably doing right now. Just like all the celebrities in this list of 19 celebrity hugs that show nobody is immune from the awkwardness of physical contact.

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This little girl giving herself a haircut will remind you why bangs are always a bad idea.

January 25, 2016, 2:10 pm

≫ Next: A bullfighter held his five-month-old baby while bullfighting. People didn't like that.

≪ Previous: A woman grinding on a bored Waka Flocka Flame is the most mortifying thing you'll see today.

Everyone can relate to this one minute video of 5-year-old Aubrey Arnold giving herself bangs, posted by her mom Debbie to Facebook in mid-January. Who hasn't eaten too much chocolate (or drunk an entire bottle of red wine) and decided it was time for a change? If there'd been YouTube beauty tutorials around when we were kids, the temptation to film these experiments would have been overwhelming. Watch Aubrey's intensity as she cuts deeper and deeper into unredeemable bangs territory. It will be like looking into your own past:

https://www.facebook.com/100005418408199/videos/457463741110902/?permPage=1

Eh, it'll grow out. Bangs always grow out.

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A bullfighter held his five-month-old baby while bullfighting. People didn't like that.

January 25, 2016, 2:15 pm

≫ Next: John Oliver shared a hilarious 'in memoriam' reel of graphics that got cut from the show.

≪ Previous: This little girl giving herself a haircut will remind you why bangs are always a bad idea.

Bullfighting is already a controversial sport, and Francisco Rivera has not helped its cause in the past day. The Spanish bullfighter shared a photo of himself, his daughter, and a bull on Instagram that has a lot of people angry.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BA7563NuC9P/

ITV translated the caption to "Carmen's debut, she is the fifth generation of my family to fight."

Rivera followed up his Instagram with a second photo that mirrors his image with one of him and his father.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BA8K596OC2W/?taken-by=f.r.paquirri

"History repeats itself. The best legacy alive, feeling, purity, honor," the caption reads.

Rivera is mostly under fire in Spanish, though there are more than a few unhappy comments and Tweets in English about him.

https://twitter.com/olicitykisses/status/691724848729579525

Rivera has spoken out on Twitter about his photo's backlash and drawn comparisons with other sports.

https://twitter.com/Paquirri74/status/691661931543990272

Twitter translates this to "The variety of insults that I am receiving and wishes of death is impressive. What kind of person you want death to another?"

https://www.instagram.com/p/3eV6lWuCxq/

Given his attitude, Rivera will probably keep posting photos with his baby and a bull, and people will keep complaining.

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John Oliver shared a hilarious 'in memoriam' reel of graphics that got cut from the show.

January 25, 2016, 3:20 pm

≫ Next: Jared Leto's tie-dyed onesie is more intense than Jared Leto as the Joker.

≪ Previous: A bullfighter held his five-month-old baby while bullfighting. People didn't like that.

Television can be a cruel mistress. A program's limited running time forces creators to make difficult decisions about what can stay and what can go. In the case of John Oliver's Last Week Tonight, this means having to cut many excellent graphics from show every season of the show. But lucky for you, the LWT squad has posted this video of graphics cut from the last season, including several excellent punny-named chickens in wigs. Now you can enjoy Hennifer Aniston in all of her glory.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DgOgdGpWqzQ

Here's the 'in memoriam' graphics reel from the first season, just so you can see how the puns have progressed.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_gRZcI1lto

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Jared Leto's tie-dyed onesie is more intense than Jared Leto as the Joker.

January 25, 2016, 4:30 pm

≫ Next: This list of movies with plots that could've easily been solved will make you angry.

≪ Previous: John Oliver shared a hilarious 'in memoriam' reel of graphics that got cut from the show.

Jared Leto: Joker. Guy who changes his hair. Jerk. Leto can now add another item to that impressive resume: dude who has taken the "sexy desert man" persona two steps too far. On Sunday, he posted this to his Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/p/BA8Az5wzBUU/?taken-by=jaredleto

If Leto uses method acting in day-to-day life, hopefully this at least means he's a chill dude when he's wearing the onesie instead of acting like the sometimes-literal horror show he was during the filming of Suicide Squad. Hashtag wolf moon indeed.

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This list of movies with plots that could've easily been solved will make you angry.

January 25, 2016, 4:50 pm

≫ Next: Seasonal

≪ Previous: Jared Leto's tie-dyed onesie is more intense than Jared Leto as the Joker.

Movies: you love 'em, but a lot of times, you have to pretend to be stupider than you really are to put up with the plots. They require viewers to ignore the fact that if the President had only listened to the scientist, or someone stabbed the villain in the face while he was knocked out, or someone simply repeated themselves to make sure they were understood, the whole thing could've ended in five minutes. Here, courtesy of Reddit, are 21 movies whose plots were only possible due to characters refusing to think of or carry out the incredibly obvious solution to their problems.