Is there a human on this earth whose first Instagram post wasn't cringeworthy?

Since Instagram debuted almost a decade ago in October 2010, the way we post photos online has changed significantly. For instance, a lot of celebrities' first posts would today be relegated to the Story function — if they made it to Insta at all. Check out this incredibly random photo of Gary Vaynerchuk and a woman on Oprah's Instagram, captioned "me and my friends."

Suffice it to say, the things we post have changed a lot. And we've all gotten a lot better at Insta. Even the celebs had to start at the bottom. Check out how celebrities' first-ever Instagram photos compare to their more recent pics.

1. Channing Tatum was a regulation hottie...

... and he still is one, now with a salt-and-pepper beard.

2. Madonna posted a pic with her dancers to celebrate Barack Obama's 2012 election win. Teamwork!

In more recent pics, she's more contemplative.

3. In Mariah Carey's first-ever Insta, she's celebrating Christmas in sparkles.

Literally nothing has changed.

4. In Mindy Kaling's first selfie, she and BJ Novak are bro-ing it up.

In her latest vid, she's all about the holiday spirit.

5. Paris Hilton's first Insta was suitably glam — but with the weird rounded picture frame edges that were all the rage in Insta's early days.

Her latest pic is even more over-the-top, complete with twinkling glitter.

6. Rob Lowe's first post is indicative of the phone-camera quality of the era.

In a more recent pic, he's traded the monkey for a dog... and the crappy camera for a good one.

7. Beyoncé's first post was a show of support for Barack Obama.

And her most recent is a bit more abstract.

8. Comedian Ali Wong was just getting her start back when she joined Instagram.

Now she's posting pics of the famous faces who come to watch her perform.

9. Baby Selena Gomez is living it up with her fans in this 2013 video.

And most recently, she posted pics of her signing albums for her fans.

10. Gwyneth Paltrow's first-ever Insta was a throwback photo of her and mom Blythe Danner.

Her latest is a selfie with her husband.

11. Pierce Brosnan is unexpectedly artsy in his first Insta.

He has since reined it in.

12. New drinking game: take a shot every time you see "J. Lo" on J. Lo's first ever Instagram post.

Nowadays she's using the platform to give the people what they came for: pics of J. Lo.

13. Kelly Clarkson is yet another celeb who used this new platform to show Obama some love.

In a new pic, she's putting her best foot forward.

14. Naomi Campbell dedicated her first pic to Nelson Mandela.

A more recent pic pays homage to model Aduta Akech Bior. Naomi knows how to share the love without aging a day.

15. Alec Baldwin's first post shows him and then-new love Hilaria.

Nowadays, the two are married with gazillions of kids.

16. Lupita Nyong'o posted a pic of herself with Oprah back in 2012.

A more recent pic shows her with her little brother.

17. The Rock paid homage to his history as a wrestler in his first pic ever.

A recent post shows just how big a star he's become.

18. Ariana Grande posted a cute pic with her grandfather. She was still a redhead back then!

A more recent post focuses more on her face.

19. Britney Spears' first pic shows her with — a forgotten British boy band?

More recently, she modeled a Christmas dress.

20. Serena Williams gave us a small hint of what was to come back in 2011.

Countless sponsorship deals and magazine covers later, she rocks the head-to-toe glitter she deserves.

21. Priyanka Chopra filtered the bejeesus out of what looks to have once been a professional photo.

Her latest selfie is much clearer.

22. Zendaya is an actual child in her first post ever.

Almost a decade later, she's all grown up.

23. Selfie queen Kim Kardashian West was just as much of a photo novice as the rest of us when she first joined Insta.

Nowadays you'll never catch her posting anything low-res.

Whether you love cops or hate them, most of us have to agree that being a police officer is not for the faint of heart. Part of the job description is showing up to bear witness to some of the darkest, grimmest, most horrific sides of humanity.

Someone recently asked police officers of Reddit: "what’s the craziest situation you’ve been in?" These 19 harrowing tales from cops (including a few from their friends and relatives) prove what most of us already knew: this job is not for everyone.

(And neither is this post—don't read ahead if you're squeamish!)

1.) From Bigbadballer88:

My dad friend who is a cop in NC told me that some teen tried to steal an electric shopping cart from Target with a fuck ton of shit in it and tried to outrun the cops but the cart only went 5mph for like 25 meters then the battery died. The cop just asked him to push the cart back since it died and return the stolen items.

2.) From xfilesarereal:

Dad tells the story of a guy he knew who kept getting caught for writing bad checks. He was such a big guy he wouldn’t fit in the police car so they would just meet him at the magistrate office and write him tickets. (I know, some trust) but a year or so after this kept happening, he got a call that there was a domestic dispute at the house. So they rush over there and he’s got an axe in his hand sitting on the front porch all bloody. They approach and tell him to put the axe down which he does and proceeded to tell them that his wife is in the bathtub, or at least her head is. But guy was completely open and cooperative, didn’t run or anything. Asked if he could meet them at the magistrate office and dad was like yeah nah dawg you’re gonna have to get in the car this time.

3.) From Risin_bison:

Responded with my partner to a welfare check on an elderly gentleman. Knocked on the door, walked in and couldn’t find him. Went to his garage and found him sound asleep behind the wheel. He tried to commit suicide by asphyxiation. Thing is, he only had a small amount of fuel and it was a new Civic. He was pissed when he woke up that I wasn’t St Peter.

4.) From Wolfhound1142:

Definitely the time that an older, mentally ill woman tried to burn her house down because she believed that was the only way to disarm the atom bomb in her attic. I got her to walk with me to my car and get in the back by telling her it was the only place she'd be safe. When I got in and started driving, she started yelling that I couldn't take her to jail because she hadn't done anything wrong. I calmly informed her that we were going to the hospital, which prompted even louder yelling of, "I'm not crazy!" I replied, "I don't think you're crazy." She screamed, "Then why are you taking me to the hospital?!" I told her, "Well, you were next to that atom bomb, right? We gotta get you checked for radiation poisoning." Her eyes got wide and she said, "Oh shit! I didn't think about that, you better hurry!"

5.) From [deleted]:

While serving in South Korea, my team was on patrol in the local drinking village when we heard someone drunkenly singing the US national anthem. At a loss for where this individual was, we finally looked up and there he was....tight rope walking on the ledge of a building 3 stories up. This is when precision of language is of vital importance...especially when dealing with a drunk. The sergeant on scene said, "Hey, come down here!" The drunkard said, "On my way!" And proceeded to step off. Under the impression I was about to witness my first death, I was in shock. Through some bit of weird luck/science, he glanced the hood of a slightly misted Daewoo truck and slid down to the ground. We ran over to him and he said, "Hey guys, how's it going?" He had open fractures on both femurs and after some makeshift splinting and controlling the bleeding, he was transported to the nearest hospital. Soju is a hell of a thing.

6.) From Philosorunner:

Attended a structural fire in a downtown high rise. Was tasked with evacuating local residents in case the building collapsed.

Third house I went to, the guy answers in a full bunny suit with gas mask propped up in his head. English wasn’t his first language, and as I was trying to communicate that he needed to evacuate, it became clear he was running a meth lab inside. Arrested Asian Walter White, and then had to sit in the shadow of the structure fire keeping eyes on the house while waiting for CLEAR (clandestine lab) team to show up. In that time fire trucks basically surrounded my vehicle so I couldn’t move it, even after CLEAR team moved in. Walter had his lawyer call in my pc, and it was about 10 hours before we could head back to cells. I’ve never had to piss so badly in my life.

7.) From j2142b:

First time my brother arrested someone was really funny. He and his training officer were working the graveyard shift and got a call for suspicious activity at a house. They arrive and the homeowner says they're is someone sneaking around his house that shouldn't be there. So they start looking around with their flashlights, grass is really overgrown in the backyard and my brother notice one of those Fisher Price kid's car (yellow & red plastic car) moving on its own. They found their guy, naked and high AF trying to hide under the kids toy and crawl away. Training officer says,"Well, he's yours rookie", had my brother cuff him (guy didn't want to go to jail and put up a naked fight) and take the guy to jail.

8.) From copswithguns:

I got a lot of messages asking for more, so here is another story:

I’m on midnight shift. I work in a small town (under 30k people) with a county of about 200k people. My beat is a suburb. We get a shots fired call. Usually these are an old lady who hears something she thinks is a gunshot but we can never locate the source and go back in service. This was different. I could hear the stress in the dispatcher’s voice as she told me it was an open-line call-this means the caller was still on the phone giving information in real time. The caller was yelling into the phone so loudly it was bleeding over into the dispatcher’s mic when she keyed up and I could hear the screaming.

Me and 3 other officers haul ass to this apartment complex. It’s a single-story unit shaped like a horseshoe with a big open courtyard. We start making our way to the complex, having parked a bit away from the suspect house. It’s about 2am on a weekday and it’s dead quiet. I don’t hear shit. I’m jumping bushes and crossing lawns with my department rifle on me while my partners are moving parallel to me. We get to the edge of the complex. And stack up. We can hear the yelling. The door to one of the apartments opens and the screaming subjects start to spill out. We don’t know who is who so we can out with rifles and handguns drawn giving commands for everyone to show hands and drop to their knees. Everyone complies.

I give cover to the three other units who start handcuffing and checking people for weapons. No gun so far. These people tell us the people who fired shots already left in a car (which they describe). We go to clear the apartment when a Hispanic male comes out covered in blood. He was ghost white from the blood loss. He is clutching his left arm, which I can see has been cut to the bone from elbow to wrist and he has arterial spurt. I realize he is minutes from death and apply a tourniquet that everyone that works in this area carries on their belt. This guy loses consciousness. We clear the apartment quickly to make sure there are no unseen threats and then radio for EMS and fire to enter.

The surgeon said 2 minutes later with that tourniquet and the guy would have bled to death. We find out that the whole thing was a drug deal gone bad and the sellers tried to take the money and split. Amazingly no one was shot. I spent the rest of the shift searching for the shitheads and writing reports. The suspects drove 1800 miles to Oregon where they were arrested.

Side note about adrenaline: it’s awesome. You don’t feel fatigue, or pain sometimes. It can be addictive.

9.) From abbrollher:

Not a cop, but a cop friend of mind in SE Washington, DC. He got a domestic disturbance call and arrived to a calm scene. The husband explained he and his wife had been arguing, and that she had gone over the top, but they were both fine now. The wife confirmed the story, but stated she didn’t want the husband back in the house that night. My friend asked if the husband had a place to go, and he agreed to go to his mother’s house for the night. The husband left, then my friend and his partner left soon after. About an hour later, they get a call back to the same house. When they get there, the husband is in the kitchen dead. The wife explains that right after the police left, her husband came back and resumed arguing with her. He got in her face and she stabbed in the neck with a chicken bone, hitting his carotid artery.

10.) From bPhrea:

A guy on a sports team I play in is a drug squad cop and told us the following story. They had staked out a meth lab house for awhile and surveilled the house with pinhole cameras for some time. They’d noticed that the occupants were becoming increasingly erratic, someone senior suggested it was due to them not replacing the filters in their protective masks.

Anyway, at some stage they decide it’s time to go in, so tactical enter and grab all the guys and clear the rooms. Then a chemical team go in to make sure everything is safe. Eventually my mate and his team go in to collect evidence with a few young uniforms to help.

The house is a bit of a shambles but nothing too unexpected, until one of the uniforms picks up a large rubber dildo and starts playing around with it in front of everybody. The senior then tells him: you know that while reviewing all the footage on this place we never saw any women entering or leaving this house... And why are you the only one not wearing gloves?

11.) From Lockerd:

I ain't a cop, but my dad is, and this happened when I was on a ridealong with him quite a few years ago....relatively short one this time.

After eating our lunch, we went down to a runoff point so he could finish some of his reports (that's usually why you see a lot of cops on the side somewhere that isn't directly connected to the main road), I was on my phone watching some videos, when he got called in to check something that was happening up the road. I was sitting in the car the entire time this happened.

Headed up the road to a construction site (by that time it had been active but non-progressing for five years), where a bunch of people were just standing around looking weird...dressed in weird suits and obvious fake construction costumes with fake hardhats. A representative of the construction company had called the police down when these people showed up and didn't say a single thing for hours, backup arrived and about six cops were trying to get two dozen people to say anything.

After a half hour passed, every single one of the trespassers began to dance and music began to blare from portable speakers, it went on until the song ended, at which point one of the dancers stood up and said "Danielle , Kyle has an important question for you". Everyone was motionless until the person who stood up started looking around and asked if either of those people were there.

It took another five minutes before a threat of arresting everyone came to head and got the speaker to finally begin talking about what was going on, turns out someone had hired a flash mob crew (they were a bigger thing back then) for a marriage proposal, but no one showed up. After all of that was done, my dad found out that the person who hired the flash mob did so to rob a jewelry store up the road and assumed that the flash mob would draw all the police to the site, not having enough intelligence to realize a flash mob trespassing on a mostly empty machine free yard wouldn't rank higher than an armed robbery of a jewelry store.

The guy was clever in a "yes yes yes, no" kind of way, the idea was logical but the execution and targets were absolute dogshit, he bragged about it, and was stupid enough to think that saying "you can't prove the flash mob was me!"....when literally no one asked him about the flash mob, he was smart but also extremely dumb. His name was actually Kyle, his wife is actually named Danielle, and he paid the flash mob crew with his own money...dumb. I would pay to have a video of his lawyers face, I doubt it was a fun day for them.

12.) From alwaysmyfault:

Not a police officer, but I know one.

I'm sure he has a million stories, but my favorite that he's told me was the time he was called to a local Mexican restaurant. When he arrived, he was directed to a Cadillac in the parking lot that was a rockin, if you get my drift.

He knocks on the window, and a butt ass naked 80 year old woman gets out, pissed off that someone interrupted her getting laid. Her 80 year old husband was laying naked in the vehicle still.

This old woman stood outside of her vehicle, completely naked, for a solid 5 minutes, arguing w my friend about how she should be able to get laid whenever she wants.

There was more to the story of course, but as I'm not the first hand story teller, I can't do the story the proper justice it deserves.

He didn't arrest them, even though she stood naked outside for 5 minutes, so she got off easy (pun intended).

13.) From copswithguns:

Did a stop on a pretty obvious dope car. Driver is tweaking on meth. Passenger also tweaking and is a female that weighs 95 pounds while being 5’8 or so. She looked like a concentration camp victim. She’s offering to provide oral services in exchange for her release. Obviously I decline.

Guy in the back appears to be asleep. I get his ID from the tweaking driver as my backup arrives. We get all 3 out, I can see needles all over the car. The guy in the back wakes up and gets out. Dispatch gives us returns, letting us know the back passenger is has a parole violation (he was released early from prison IYDK) for felon in possession of a firearm. The dispatcher was supposed to warn us before giving the return out loud over the radio but didn’t in this case. Old dude stands up and reaches in his waistband. I see this happening in slow motion and realize it’s about to get real. My partner swings from around the other side of the vehicle where he was talking to one of the other suspects. I start to yell gun in time for my partner to straight up linebacker this dude, which we got into cuffs. Had a .45 in the waistband.

I went home and hugged my son, who was 1 at the time.

14.) From SgtSavage1106:

Answered a disturbance call to find a drunk dude climbing in a car while his wife screamed at him. She smacked his windshield with a bat, destroying it as he peeled out. We followed him maybe .5 mile with the sirens and lights while he drove with his head out the window Ace Ventura style. Poor bastard didn’t get his head back inside in time passing a UPS truck and his head pieces ended up on my windshield.

15.) From tenthplagueb:

I just asked my dad, who was a cop for 30+ years.

He told me he pulled over a car full of "Woodchucks", older drunkards from a rural area in the Northeast area of the US. He was in his late 20's at the time, so in good shape compared to the drunks. I think there were 4. While my dad was processing the driver, he had him in the front seat of his car. Once the guy realized he was probably going to be arrested, he started ripping the radio and anything he could grab out of his car. He grabbed my dad and pulled him out of the passenger side of his vehicle and onto the ground. My dad landed between this guy's legs and into some kind of leg-lock chokehold. The guy, during all this, has started to scream to his friends to get his gun and kill him. Once he has him in a leg-lock, he looks down and says "now I'm gonna kill you." before he starts to choke my dad with his legs. I guess backup showed up just in time, or had been there, the deputy at the time hit him in the head with a baton and sent him out.

16.) From fastcapy:

My first day on the job with a small dept. Get an animal complaint at a house along the river. RP states there are some angry geese in her yard that won't let her out her door.

My FTO (field training officer) and I roll up. Sure enough, a gaggle of 8 big angry geese in the yard are basically barricading the little old lady in her house.

We try to make noise and scatter them. They have no fear and go on the offensive. We retreat to take cover behind the squad car as we formulate a plan. We decide we will use the dog control poles, which we normally use to wrangle loose dogs, to try and catch the geese while keeping them a safe distance from us. The FTO gives me the brand new pole that has yet to be used.

The FTO and I both grab a pole and head back into battle. I get close to one and it takes off running. I follow in hot pursuit. I get within reach and make a diving leap with the pole and somehow manage to get the noose around it's neck and pull it tight. As my body crashes to the ground, the pole falls free of my grasp. I watch in shock as the damn goose runs into the river dragging the brand new control pole behind. I figured the goose would slip the noose once in the water and the pole would go to the bottom of the river. Great, now the chief is gonna be pissed I lost the brand new pole in the river...

Well, the next day we got a call from a bus driver reporting kids on the bus we're upset that they could see a dead goose as they crossed the bridge and it appeared someone strangled it with some kind of pole... Oh F...

Sure enough that damn goose from the day before never shook the noose and managed to get the pole stuck on a piece of drift wood, pulled the noose tight and strangled itself right in view of the school kids heading over the bridge on the bus...

The FTO and I headed over to the boat launch and commandeered a pontoon boat, headed to the dead goose and plucked it from the river. The boater was not quite sure what to think of the whole ordeal but we all ended up having a good laugh and I got our new animal control pole back!

I never lived it down.

Tl;dr: Got in an altercation with a goose, lost the departments new animal control pole, upset a bunch of kids on their way to school and commandeered a boat to retrieve the now accidentally dead goose.

17.) From -CarterG-:

My partner and I once received a call out about an escaped swan. Let me tell you we definitely did not have any luck catching it.

18.) From subarutim:

I've told this story before on reddit. I was a special deputy at the Aspen airport (Sardy Field). This was about 1990. I was just standing around the front of the very quiet airport one summer's day, gazing at the sky (pretty stoned, I think ;)...

In drives Dr. Hunter S. Thompson in his old red convertible (yes, that one). He was wearing a long blonde wig, and was sitting up on the back of the seat, steering with a foot. I assume he had rigged some kind of throttle control (probably just a stick, lol). It was just me on the sidewalk, and him in the traffic circle doing a slow crawl-by. It was such a slow day there were no porters on duty. He did the Queen wave, just slowly going past me... I was in stitches. One of the most surreal moments of my life.

I got a private performance by one of the most strange and intelligent dudes, ever. We'd had other encounters, but this one was special ;)

19.) From poopypantsposse:

My dads a cop. One time Owen Wilson was filming a movie in the city my dad is a cop in. My dad caught him intoxicated peeing in a bush in public.

If you've ever worked in retail, food service, or really any customer-facing job — you know the hell that is dealing with rude customers. One coffee shop employee who was fed up with dealing with customer temper tantrums came up with a brilliant hack for shutting them down.

The barista's "hack" is that anytime a customer raises their voice or complains about their order, the barista's co-worker pretends to be the "boss" and "fires" the barista on the spot while the customers cringe and try to retract their complaints, fearful that their petty grievances just cost someone their job.

The anonymous barista shared their story to Reddit's "Am I The Asshole" because one of their friends thought their coffee shop hack was a "mean prank" to play on the unsuspecting customers, so the barista had to wonder if they were the asshole in the situation.

The teenaged barista explained how they were fed up with rude customers that came into the coffee shop.

So sometimes customers will come in and just be angry about such little stuff. Like literally blow up about nothing. I dunno if theyre in a bad mood already and looking for someone to take it out on or what, but it's a lot... Like how sad so your have to be to be a grown-ass man taking your anger out on high school and college kids.

So OP and their co-worker — and fellow high-schooler — James decided to play a little prank on mean-spirited customers and "fire" OP each time they supposedly screwed up a customer order.

So one day I was at work and some guy was having a temper about how we don't make the coffee hot enough... Which I couldn't do a thing about because I gave it to him right out of the machine.

So James came in and was like "sir is there a problem here" and the guy started ranting at him too. So he was just like "OP, this is unacceptable, you're fired."

After OP's co-worker pretended to fire her, OP would play it up hard.

I started acting real sad, like "no please don't fire me, my family needs the money, I need this job, pleaseeee" and he played up being a hard-ass, telling me to take off my apron and leave.

The angry guy started to backtrack, like "It isn't that big of a problem, you don't need to fire her over it. I didn't mean it" and James was like "No, we pride ourselves on the best customer service."

OP says that they and their co-workers found it real "satisfying" to see the customers freak out after learning they'd gotten someone "fired. "

And we've done it a couple times, whenever a customer will lose their temper...James will storm in and "fire" us. And almost every time, the person who had come in angry will apologise and say that they didn't mean it. It's kind of satisfying, making people realize their actions might actually have consequences.

However, the barista's friends thought they were rude for making people think they had caused someone to lose their job, but Reddit chimed in with full support for the barista and most echoed the sentiment that their little "prank" is a "perfect way of dealing with hostile customers" and that OP is definitely NOT the asshole here.

Commadusaurelias thinks that OPs "tactic" will teach rude customers to stop complaining so much.

"When the hostile customers try to backtrack what they say makes it worth it. OPs tactic hopefully teaches them to stop complaining to service workers about things out of their control."

Lolak1445 thinks OPs hack is "hilarious."

NTA. I think it’s hilarious and maybe it’ll teach some people a lesson about controlling their assholery.

Pap-no wished they had OPs confidence to do the same at their job.

This is so great I’ve been threatened by customers saying I need to be fired for being “so incompetent” at my serving job I wish I could do something like this!

Thechosenjuanliveson agreed that the best way to diffuse a stressful situation is to politely get the customer to see how unreasonable they're being.

Definately, I'm a retail manager (in the customer service department, no less!) And the best and easiest way to get a person to calm down, is to show them the extent of their logic (if you can).

The OP is most definitely not the asshole here, and we'd go so far to say that OP is a damn hero. On behalf of everyone that has ever worked in customer service, bless you.

Even if you don't celebrate Christmas, chances are you celebrate the weird dead zone between Christmas and New Years. Traditions include emotional overeating, day-drinking, and existential thoughts. It's a time for restlessness, boredom, fighting with your loved ones, overindulging on leftovers, and ruminating on the mistakes we made over the past year that we plan to rectify with our New Year's resolution.

If you're currently in crisis, depressed, or just wondering what day it is, take comfort in knowing that you're not the only person in the midst of a late-December meltdown. In fact, it seems all of Twitter (and certainly the person writing this post) is suffering alongside you.

These 31 tweets perfectly sum up this strange period of time that people are calling "Betwixtmas," "Crimbo Limbo," or "The Merrineum."

Enjoy them while you eat leftover pie straight out of the tin with your hands at 11 am. Merry Betwixtmas!!!!!!

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Apparently some people....like this time of year?!

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Most people are just confused.

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What day is it again?!

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If there's a common theme, it's: overeating.

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And over-thinking.

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People are coming up with creative ways to describe this festive purgatory.

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Some of us actually have to work this week, so....be kind. Tip your servers well (and your bloggers—I'm on Venmo).

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We have a few days left, so try to make the best of this non-time. Go wild. There are no rules.

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Bottoms (of the entire pie tin) up!

Sometimes one person in a relationship — the one who wants to get "proposed to" someday — will do that thing where they drop hints about their ideal engagement ring. "I'm a size 7 in rings, just in case you were wondering," or "I've always loved emerald-cut diamonds like my mom's ring." You know, subtle hints. Typically, the ring buyer will store those information nuggets away for the future, but it's rare for someone to go out and buy their partner's ideal ring a few months into the relationship and then just sit on it for the next three years, secretly waiting for the right moment to arise. It's either incredibly ballsy or totally romantic, and one Los Angeles couple did just that.

Elan and Molly had only been dating for eight months when Molly stumbled upon an emerald engagement ring she liked. She tried it on, mentioned to Elan that she liked it, and moved on with her life.

Little did she know that her boyfriend of eight months went back to the store and bought the ring, pocketing it for the next three years, waiting for the right moment.

He then hid the ring "in a small box that I kept behind our bed."

For three years, Molly slept two feet from her engagement ring, totally unaware.

Finally, on a skiing trip to Japan, Elan knew the time had come to pull out the ring.

Reader: She said yes.

The good people of Twitter were very much here for this love story and how it all unfolded.

The only thing that makes this story even better is that the Elan in this story is a producer for The Bachelor, you know, the show that traffics in incredibly short and whirlwind relationship, though Elan joked that he, personally, is "a proponent of very long and slow relationships."

Congrats to these two lovebirds who prove that the saying "when you know, you know" really is true.

Every LGBTQ child deserves parents who are firmly in their corner, supporting their right to love who they love and defending them against any homophobia and hate that might come their way. In short, they deserve a parent like the mom of Cydney Prescott.

This is Cydney Prescott.

He shared on Twitter the day after Christmas about how his homophobic family members tried to hold a "meeting" about him being gay. Then his mom came in and kicked some ass.

He writes:

Xmas I found out my family tried to have a “meeting” about me being gay &my mom CLEARED THE MF’N ROOM “Idgaf how none of y’all feel HE’S MINE and if you don’t want to deal with him, fuck you cuz you dont have to, BUT I KNOW, none of you will have shit to say to me about it!”

Now THAT is an ally.

Prescott followed up by showing love for his mom. He clearly realizes she's something special.

Apparently her Grade A momming has something to do with the stars.

After Cydney's tweet went viral, he let his mom know that she's extremely popular on a lil website called Twitter. She seems to appreciate it—she even asked for screenshots.

People are praising the mom, and imagining how this all went down.

The context for Cydney's mom telling him this story is also really sweet.

A few bad apples aside, it seems like Cydney is in good hands.

I think this guy speaks for everyone when he says:

If you need a New Year's Resolution, may I recommend: be like Cydney's mom. Always defend your kids and your loved ones against bigotry, even when it's coming from your own family. And don't be afraid to "CLEAR MF'N ROOM." That's 1000% more important than quitting carbs or going to the gym.

When a bride's dream photographer canceled on her a month before her big day, she enlisted her friend to help her find a replacement photographer. Seems easy enough, right? Except the bride wants the photographer to replicate the "style" of the photographer who bailed on her, to give her a discount, to track down the security deposit from the first photographer, and to locate some obscure mountain setting for the photos because the bride is adamant about having her "dream" "winter wonderland" wedding. Oh, and the friend that is supposed to help the bride find this dream photographer? That friend was never even invited to the wedding!

One disgruntled pal took to Reddit to vent over her recent interaction with said bridezilla.

The story goes that the bride's dream photographer (who we'll call Ashley) bails on her before the wedding, so she reaches out to a mutual pal of a new photographer and well, things don't exactly start off on the right foot.

"It's sweet that you think someone who is planning a wedding would have time for a phone call!" Uhhh kay???

After the friend calls the bride "condescending" and gives the bride the photographer's email, the bride seemingly refuses to contact the photographer herself and hits the friend with this:

"One day you might get engaged..." Wow. So now that we've set the stage for the the kind of person we're working with here, let's get into it.

The bride then launches into her must-haves for the new photographer, starting with a demand for a discount and late delivery on the deposit payment that the new photographer must extract from the original photographer herself, because to quote the bride, "I literally don't have the time!"

Demand #2: The new photographer must study Ashley's photography style and replicate it so the bride doesn't "miss out on her dream." Oh and the new photographer has to ask Ashley for directions to some mountain town so the bride can pose in the snow.

The photographer must replicate Ashley's style because "her style is just stunning and gives that picture-perfect Instagram style, you know?" Also, if the photographer has any reservations about jacking another photographer's style, the bride promises that the photographer will gain tons of new Instagram followers once she figures out how to shoot like the beloved Ashley.

To make matters worse, the so-called friend tasked with finding the new photographer clarified on Reddit that she's not even friends with the bride, she's just a co-worker, and she wasn't even invited to the wedding!

We aren't really friends, just have mutual friends and our jobs cross paths from time to time. I wasn't invited to the wedding, and wasn't going to go out of my way to help her as she's usually quite deplorable, though not this bad.

The friend elaborated that after she received that long diatribe from the bride she told her that it was innappropriate to expect a photographer to copy someone else's style.

I sent her a response telling her that photography is art, and asking an artist to copy someone else's "style" (the way she uses this word is grating) is just wrong and completely inappropriate.

Her response: She said she was just trying to give an opportunity for my friend. She only has 4000 followers and Ashley's style would help her get more.

No surprisingly, no one on Reddit was Team Bride.

Ultimately, the friend did not reach out to the photographer as dictated and the bride ended the conversation by telling the "friend" that if her boyfriend ever "decides to propose" that she'll "understand perfectly why she has this vision and I would be upset if someone wasn't going to follow the vision the way I wanted."

And then she told me I was disinvited to the wedding. But I was never invited.

Imagine being this much of a Bridezilla and then topping it with being cheap. If only the bride submitted this Reddit post herself, then we'd have the ultimate Reddit trifecta: a r/Bridezillas, r/ChoosingBeggars and r/AmItheAsshole trinity.

One influencer is getting a head start on her unborn child's personal brand in a pretty unconventional way, and people have thoughts about it.

Temitope Adesina, or @naturallytemi, is a Charlotte, North Carolina-based beauty and fashion influencer. She's also integrating her pregnancy into her content.

Under a recent sponsored post about stretch mark products, she received the usual roll call of flattering comments about her cute baby bump. And she got one comment from an account no one had ever seen before: @naturallybabytemi. Yes, dear reader, she and her husband made the account, pretending to be her unborn child.

"Mommy is that me?" @naturallybabytemi writes.

And @naturallytemi replies, "of course it's you my princess," with a heart emoji.

Then, the account "belonging to" Baby Temi comments again:

Obviously none of this is hurting anyone and in this day and age, it's pretty standard for new moms to nest in odd social-media-centric ways. Like, is this any weirder than a gender reveal? Not really. But people are freaking out:

Adesina commented that her husband was leaving the comments through the baby's account, but some followers still gave her flack and are dragging her for it on Twitter.

But others are sticking up for her, pointing out that moms talking to their babies in the womb is nothing new.

What is new, though, is using social media to write your own baby's responses. A communications consultant has called Adesina's use of Instagram to commune with her unborn child both "bizarre" and "imaginative."

He wrote a whole thread about mothers speaking to their babies throughout history, which you can read here if you feel called to do so.

The consensus seems to be: yeah, posing as your own unborn child on Instagram is a little goofy. But it's not hurting anyone.

And the biggest winners of all this are Adesina, her baby, and the brand she promoted in the post. All three have gone way more viral than originally intended.

Adesina herself is clearly unbothered.

Ringing in the New Year can be fun, but it's critically important to also stay safe...

Between wearing scratchy sequined dresses with precariously tall heels, illegal-for-indoors sparklers, excessive drinking and amateurs attempting to open bottles of champagne, New Year's Eve automatically comes with a whole lot of hazardous situations. Considering a major New Year's Eve tradition is watching a giant, heavy, crystal-studded orb drop into a crowded Times Square while Mariah Carey demands tea--NYE is a built in recipe for dangerous disasters. Have a good time, but remember to get a designated driver or a cab, stay away from sharp objects and set minimal items on fire. And, if you insist on some sort of pyrotechnics for your party, keep them very far away from your buttocks...

While you prepare for your party, allow these medical professionals to share their dangerous tales of New Year's Eve with their answers to the Reddit question, "What was the dumbest injury you saw on New Year's Eve?" Look fabulous, but stay smart in 2020, kids!

1. Oh no, "silentgoldfish."

I worked emergency NYE. Dumbest injury was by far this one:

Girl drinks too much and passes out. Drunk fiancé decides that sleeping drunk girl has died and starts CPR. After each round of CPR drunk girl pushes fiancé off her chest because CPR hurts. Fiancé gets friend to hold down drunk girl's arms and continues CPR. Ambulance arrives, throws fiancé off drunk girl and brings her to us complaining of a sore chest.

2. Sometimes you have to hose people down, "bunmarda."

Im a bouncer and ive worked over 10 NYE events... the dumbest thing you see is a ton of intox... this year I had to assist a police officer who cut his forehead with his hat, I had to pull out a girl out the garbage bin because she fell in while she was puking, a chick falling down the escalators and walking it off like a boss(theres something fucked up about hearing someone roll and smash their head on steel steps), ... the worst thing Ive had to deal with was 2 NYE ago I was paged over to the female washroom to help a girl get her friend out of the stall because she was passed out... I opened up the door and as soon as the door swung open the girl who was sitting on the toilet puked all over her friend and shat herself while trying to get up, her friend looked at the puke and puked all over her friend... one of the female bouncers gave them a whole bunch of paper towel to clean up but when we called over a cab none of the cabbies wanted them because the the state they were in... we ended up taking the girls to the back and hosed them down with a garden hose

3. WHAT, "FFEMT39."

I'm an EMT and the dumbest I've seen yet was a guy who was dragged by a car. This guy had his wallet taken by people he knew so instead of calling the cops, he hung onto the spoiler of a car for over a mile. He kept most of his balance on his steel toed boots and actually left a huge groove in the pavement.

4. This would be painful, "ThorneLea."

Former Transporter. I was heading home one night when a guy drunk off his ass asked me for a wheelchair near the E.R. I got him one and he helped his friend get into it. The guy had a full-sized longsword with no hilt through his foot. He was laughing. They had wrapped a kitchen towel around his foot with duct tape.

This is a lesson on why not to use decorative swords and drink at the same time.

5. Wow, "wanderingkale."

Some (very) drunk guys at some hedonistic party put the end of a sparkler you hold in the ass and lit them. On one of the guys it either wasn't 'secure' enough or something and it ended up giving him second and third degree burns in the taint, inside ass cheeks, and ball sac. It was pretty tough to call that in to the burn center on the radio and stay professional.

6. This is epic, "funny-chubby-awesome."

winner was the guy at the local hook-up-douche-bar that lifted his shirt in effort to gain the affection of another. The motion set him off balance and he fell from a second-story railing onto the dance floor.

7. WHY, "whatamidoinghere78."

A drunk teenager stapled his balls together

8. Drinking on the job can get dangerous, "Gertiel."

At the neighborhood bar last night, people were evidently buying a lot of drinks for the bartenders. Fine enough, until one of the bartenders had trouble opening a twist top bottle of wine. In an effort to force it open, he managed to break the neck in two and sort of drive the broken ends into his opposite wrist on one hand, palm on the other. The wrist wound was shooting blood across the bar as the guy just stood there staring until another bartender grabbed him with a bar towel and wrapped it up tightly. EMS said they got fifty calls from various people in the bar with cells when the manger called them, and that they were on their way.

9. AHHHHHH, "EngineEight."

The upstanding young gentleman who used crazy glue instead of eyedrops. Happy new year!

10. Yikes, "[deleted].

My friends best story from the night was being called to an apartment building where a guy was attempting to drop a beer bottle from the 3rd floor into the recycling bin outside. He fell into said recycling bin, which was filled with glass bottles.

Stitches everywhere. Broken Tib/Fib.

11. Don't use spiky metal as a towel, "AustrianReaper."

I'm a paramedic: I had a girl, that was drunk out of her mind, and decided, that after some guy spilled beer on her shirt, she'd like to wash it off with steel wool. Resulting in minor cuts all over her breasts. Natural selection desperately needed.

12. Wow, "bloomsday289."

Testing the food processor with her finger....

13. Watch your ass on the ice, "[deleted]."

Saw a group of drunk people try and make it down some icy stairs. (Doing that sober is a serious challenge) Of course all of them slipped, one of them stayed on the ground claiming he broke his ass.

14. Watch out for walls, "[deleted]."

one guy came in with both his arms COVERED in blood and yelling about how "The fucking wall came at him!" he had several broken bones. His friend who was with him told my aunt that he was in a fight and in an attempt to prove himself he yelled at a wall then started punching and kicking it, he also tackled 2 layers of sliding glass doors... Which is probably why he was covered in blood.

15. Edward Forty-Hands, "cC2Panda."

Just something I saw that we had to call an ambulance for years ago. A kid finished off his second forty and had the bright Idea to smash them together in his hands. He messed up both of his hands bad and had some serious arm injuries as well.

16. Sticking the landing is key, "_nitsuj."

middle age lady in 5 inch heels attempted to slide down a railing. didn't quite stick the landing, as she ended up with one ankle fractured in three places, and the other pretty badly sprained.

5. Pete Davidson, because his girlfriend's parents are freaking out about him.

Pete Davidson is a comedian famous for dating the world's most beautiful women who sometimes appears on Saturday Night Live.

His latest girlfriend is supermodel Kaia Gerber. Some people think it's weird that the 26-year-old man is dating a 18-year-old girl, including Gerber's parents.

In a recent bit on SNL,Davidson joked about spending Christmas break in rehab, and it's unclear whether or not it was "just a joke."

"I’m going on 'vacation' but insurance pays for some of it, and they take your phone and shoelaces," he said on Weekend Update."And it costs $100,000 but I still have roommates."

Page Six—in all its invasive, sensationalistic glory—posted a video of Gerber's parents Cindy Crawford and Rande Gerber standing outside their daughter's New York apartment.

The tabloid reports:

The 53-year-old supermodel looked shaken as she listened to her husband describe a conversation he appeared to have had with Davidson, Dailymail.com reported. Citing an unnamed bystander, the site said that Gerber was heard saying the person upstairs had “scratched eyes” and was “freaking out.”

Davidson was then spotted driving off in an SUV.

The Daily Mail's composition truly paints a picture.

The tabloids are all up in this saga, with People now sharing pictures of Kaia and her mom landing at LAX, with the headline, "Cindy Crawford and Kaia Gerber Seen at LAX After Reported Concern Over Pete Davidson Relationship."

4. Sharon Stone, because she had to puclicly beg Bumble to un-ban her.

Stars, they're just like us: they use dating apps! Unlike us, however, is that stars have their profiles shut down because people assume that they're fake.

Sharon Stone, your dad's favorite actress, tweeted a plea to the dating app Bumble to restore her account, because she also wants to meet strangers on an app whose female-first format somewhat filters out the unsolicited dick pics.

Incidentally, Stone's most famous movie moment was when she flashed her vagina at her interrogators in Basic Instinct, so she's no stranger to people showing off their genitals.

Clare O'Connor, the app's editorial director, apologized to Stone, reinstated her profile, and wished her luck on her quest.

It's truly humbling to know that one can be rich and famous and still be looking for love while on their phone on the toilet.

3. Zac Efron, because he almost died while filming a show called Killing Zac Efron.

The star of Baywatch and High School Musical might seem easy to brush off as a frivolous hunk, but the star takes his work very seriously.

While filming his upcoming serious aptly titled Killing Zac Efron, the actor and now travel show host was hospitalized in Papua New Guinea for what is being called"a typhoid-like infection."

Efron has assured the people that he is okay, and has "bounced back" and is now home for the holidays.

According to Deadline,the show sees Efron "deep into the jungles of a remote, dangerous island to carve his own name in expedition history."

Bacteria is no match for Troy Bolton. You can bet on it.

2. The trio that was busted for drugs after stealing donuts.

Where there's smoke, there's fire, and where there's stolen donuts, there's...drugs.

Three dumpster divers in York, Nebraska were busted for drugs after police were after them for stealing six dozen donuts from a donut delivery truck.

Employees at Grand Central Foods reported the donut theft to the police, who recognized two of the suspects and got a warrant to search a home they believed was the donuts' destination. "When officers arrived they found the doughnuts, along with meth, marijuana and drug paraphernalia. Police obtained a second search warrant to obtain all the drugs in the home," KSBN Local reports.

If there's one thing that cops take seriously, it's donuts.

Do not mess with donuts.

1. The mom who went viral for mixing up her teen angst shows with Zendaya.

An adorable mom was psyched to show her son that she stumbled upon Zendaya in Oakland, but she forgot to look Zendaya up on IMDB first.

The mom said, "It's your girl from the show 13 Reasons!" Zendaya politely said, "I'm on Euphoria." She genuinely seemed to find the mixup funny, and was really refreshingly nice to Jordan's mom.

One thing is for certain: nobody is confused whether or not Zendaya is, in fact, Meechee.

This is a last-minute submission for song of the decade.

We all know the first rule of attending a wedding is that you don't wear a white dress, so help you god.

The second rule is that you don't wear a white pantsuit. The third rule is that you don't wear anything in a light pastel shade that could be construed as white through a telescope from 500 miles away.

Basically, don't even wear anything approaching the white family, or else the bride has license to throw you out of her Special Day and/or accuse you of trying to upstage her for the rest of your lives.

If you do find yourself in a pinch with nothing to wear but a light-yellow jumpsuit, you should probably go back to square one and buy something else, no matter how fugly.

But another option is to text the bride and ask her if it's okay. One woman learned the hard way that some brides will either lie to you about the appropriateness of said jumpsuit, or forget they ever approved it.

A woman took to Reddit to ask for advice after her bride-approved outfit caused her to be gossiped about all wedding long, and even on Facebook afterward.

Her question: is she the a-hole for wearing a nearly white outfit that the bride herself had approved? And furthermore, is she an a-hole for calling the birde out about lying on social media afterward?

It all started with a yellow jumpsuit that looked brighter online.

"I ordered a nice yellow jumpsuit for the wedding from a trusted retailer," the woman wrote, continuing:

When it came, it was much paler than the picture, basically a straw yellow. I started to worry as I’d read those stories about guests wanting to steal the thunder by wearing white/traditional wedding dress colours at weddings, and I messaged my friend to ask if she was wearing white. She said she was, and asked why. I sent a picture of the jumpsuit and said that this was what I’d been sent in place of a much brighter colour. She said that it looked fine, and she’d shut anyone up if they tried to make a deal about it on the day.

With the bride's fervent blessing, she thought she'd be good to go. But at the wedding, she overheard people talking smack:

On the day itself, I didn’t actually get any comments about it directly, which was a relief. However, when I went to the bathroom, I encountered two of the bridesmaids gossiping about how that girl in the jumpsuit (so, me) had the nerve to wear it, especially after the bride had told her directly it wasn’t suitable. To frame this as it happened, I was in a cubicle when they came in and started chatting. I came out of the cubicle, and said that no such conversation had happened, and if the bride really had an issue she should have told me months ago when we talked about it. They basically scoffed and said they’d believe me when they saw the ‘receipts’.

To make matters worse, they gave her the stink eye:

I saw them later on in the evening with the bride, and all three of them were giving me the stink eye.

Then, the bride posted what the woman perceived to be a subliminal dis against her on Facebook:

Yesterday, the bride posted a thank you message on Facebook, with the comment that ‘even scene-stealing wannabes’ couldn’t spoil the day. I was going to leave it, but one of the bridesmaids commented with a poorly-taken picture of me from behind with drawn-on devil horns and tail.

So she posted the receipts:

I reacted on impulse, and posted screenshots of the conversation where the bride had told me that my outfit was fine, with a comment saying that it was a shame that the bride couldn’t tell me to my face there was an issue, and that since I’d been asked for ‘receipts’, here they were. The comment got a few further comments saying that the tea had been spilled and that this is what happens when people don’t know all the facts, as well as the inevitable ones saying that I was being childish and creating a drama.

So now she's wondering: was she in the wrong?

I do view this as stooping down to the level of those who couldn’t even tell me straight there was an issue (I mean I had another dress in my car just in case I got comments) in how I reacted, but I also think I was defending my reputation and honour among people I’ve known for over two decades. The peace-keeping side of me wants to apologise to the bride, but my heart knows she won’t offer the same olive branch, especially now people know she was two-faced in this situation.

Most agree that the bride overreacted.

One person pointed out that a jumpsuit is far enough from a wedding gown that it shouldn't have mattered:

I fail to see how a pale yellow jumpsuit would be a huge distraction from a bride in all her wedding gown get up anyways? People were trashing you, you responded and defended yourself. - CogginNoggin

But some said the woman should've just worn something else:

I mean, the bride saying it's ok weeks before the event won't save you from the MOH deciding to "accidentally" spill a glass of red wine on you to punish you for the infraction, and it won't stop other people from gossiping about how you were trying to upstage the bride on her special day. The smart thing to do would've been to wear a different outfit or have the jumpsuit dyed to the colour she originally wanted it to be.

That said, I think OP's totally in the right to not tolerate the wedding party's mean girl bullshit and I also think NTA. - HistoricalKoala

After all, it shouldn't be up to the bride to judge whether your outfit's appropriate:

If you have to ask the bride, it’s probably a reason not to wear it.

I’m still going with NTA, and I obviously don’t think anyone was justified in saying anything to OP. But the whole thing could have been avoided if OP simply saved or returned the jumpsuit and wore something that she knew was appropriate. - accountforbabystuff

And it wouldn't be crazy for the bride to just lie and say it's okay so that she doesn't seem like the bad guy:

Yeah, and maybe the bride didn't want to be a b*tchy bridezilla, and said there was no problem because she doesn't like confrontation. I think of this whenever someone proposes at a wedding and say "I asked the bride and groom, they loved the idea!". Maybe they're just trying to be nice, and feel obligated to say it's fine because they're family/close friends and they feel bad/aren't good at setting boundaries

If you have to ask, then just don't do it. It's someone else's wedding, for f*cks sake. No one will remember what you wore the next day, unless you wore something inappropriate. - jenroberts

Most agreed that the nasty behavior from the bride and her friends was immature and uncalled for:

They literally took a picture of you without your consent and posted it on the internet. You have the right to defend yourself. - flamealchemist_

But they suggested apologizing because, again, unwritten rules of weddings:

I mean you knew it was off enough to bring another dress in the car. This was a situation where you should have gone with your gut. It was too light colored.

The bride should have been straightforward but maybe she was trying to seem not like a bridezilla. Maybe your picture was not a good one. Maybe you two just aren’t friends.

Apologize because it’s the right thing to do. You shouldn’t withhold an apology because the other person might not reciprocate. - AlmaReville

So the takeaway is: if you have to ask whether your wedding outfit is appropriate, it's probably not. No matter what the bride says.

The bride has enough on her plate without having to adjudicate other people's wardrobe issues. Wear something else!

Explaining cuss words, their implications, and why we shouldn't use them in our daily interactions can be a complicated conversation to have with your children - particularly if you swear yourself.

However, with the stream of swear-filled media and the influences of other children, giving your children the low-down on cuss words is an inevitable conversation. It's not a matter of whether it'll happen, but rather, how your household chooses to handle it.

For Dax Shepard and Kristen Bell, parenting their daughters Delta and Lincoln is all about transparency and finding the fun in all the teachable moments, many of which they share with their online followers.

So, when one of their daughters came home from school and told Shepard about a kid at school who uses the middle finger, it opened up a wholesome but amusing conversation that Bell documented on her Instagram stories.

Their daughter shared that she learned the middle finger means the F word, and went on to tell her dad how a male classmate constantly flipped people off.

Shepard responded by confirming it meant the swear word, and agreeing that it was "naughty" for the classmate to use it.

Shepard went on to praise his daughter for not using the middle finger after learning what it means: "You know that’s a naughty finger and I never see you do that. It makes me so proud. That you know it, yet you don’t do it."

During all of this, Bell tried not to laugh, and wrote that she's been waiting for this conversation ever since getting pregnant.

As the conversation progressed, Shepard told their daughter she had used the F word a few times without realizing the meaning, but they hadn't punished her because they knew it was unintentional.

"One time you couldn’t get a shirt on in your bedroom and you let it fly and then later that day you were in the swimming pool and you let one fly, but then since then you’ve really curbed it,” he said.

When their daughter insisted that she didn't know it was a bad word at that time, Shepard agreed, and shared that he knew it was an accident.

“You’re right,” Shepard replied. “We just ignored it and hoped you wouldn’t say it a lot, which seemed to work.”

It was hardest for Bell not to laugh when she heard her daughter use the F word pragmatically, while describing her classmate's behavior.

While it was hard for Bell to keep composure during the exchange, she praised Shepard for handling it brilliantly.

Learning about the middle finger is truly a rite of passage in childhood, a pinnacle moment of exploration for a lot of kids who want to know the ins and outs of what is "naughty." Shepard and Bell's daughters are lucky to have parents who are both good-humored and also set an example of how to treat others.

A cello teacher, Ms. Asif, received the rudest, most unhinged email from a student's mother and posted it on Twitter.

After a mother noticed her children's clothing had an "ethnic stench" when he returned home from cello lessons, she decided to email her child's teacher and now we have no choice but to call her Stench Sandy now.

First of all, what exactly is an "ethnic stench?" Anything cooked with a single spice? The word "stench" is so objectively offensive she didn't even try to soften the landing here.

Of course, the original email went viral and the plot started to thicken. Ms. Asif explained that the reason she cooks for her student is because he is always hungry during his lessons, most likely because his mother often skips his meals to put her child on a diet.

People were immediately baffled:

Ms. Asif then expertly and professionally responded to Stench Sandy with a grace this mother definitely didn't deserve.

And she kept everyone updated on what happened next:

She received overwhelming support:

This is such a disappointing story to happen in 2019, but it's brave and helpful that Ms. Asif shared her experience as it could hopefully change some ignorant opinions. Good luck to Antonio and his kind and incredibly patient teacher, keep playing music and making incredible food!

Our bodies carry a knowledge our conscience brains sometimes don't. There are times when our guts sense danger long before we know why, and all the alarms go off internally at one time.

While following your gut feeling can feel crazy at times, particularly when it means you leave a location with no clear reason, there are plenty of times when our fight or flight is kicking in early to save us or loved ones from a grim fate.

All it takes is one anecdote where your gut steers you right to confirm the fact that temporary fear can be a gift and compass at times, steering us towards safety through a subconscious wisdom.

In a recent Reddit thread, people shared times their gut helped save them or a loved one from danger, and it serves as a great reminder of how intelligent our bodies are.

1. instinctivechopstick had a feeling about their body.

I went to hospital with shortness of breath and my heart racing. They did a chest x-ray, blood test for blood clots, ecg, and a few other tests but all came back normal. After observing me overnight everything still looked good, oxygen saturation was perfect, my heart rate was still a bit elevated but nothing too crazy, and it seemed that it was likely leftover symptoms from a bad virus that I'd had a week or so earlier.

The ER doctor asks me how I would feel if they sent me home and I just had a bad feeling about it all. I told him as such and that I had no real basis for it except that I just felt off about it. He said fair enough, let's try one more test and if that comes back negative then we'll send you up to General Medicine and see if they can track something down.

That test was a VQ scan that found despite all other tests showing no results for blood clots, I actually had a whole bunch of them in both lungs. I ended up with a diagnosis of unprovoked bilateral pulmonary embolisms and am on blood thinners for life.

Super grateful both for the bad feeling and the ER doctor who was willing to listen to it!

2. landronious hopes the children in the station wagon are okay.

I was 15 years old and my mom dropped me off at McDonald’s to get breakfast while she went across the street to get Starbucks. It was a shopping mall in suburbia and we were on the way to pick up a new kitten a few hours away. Instead of walking the 100 yards to my mom I sat outside waiting for her to pick me up. Teenagers I guess. As I’m standing there a guy in an old station wagon with two kids in the back starts talking to me.

He asks me where I’m going and I say whatever town it was. He says he’s going there too with his kids and asks if I want to come. I tell him no that my mom is across the street and he comes closer. My gut is saying something is off so I see a random woman walk out of Starbucks and I point to her and say that’s my mom right there. He freaked out and left really quick. I still remember those two kids in the backseat. They looked so off. I wonder to this day if they are okay.

3. kag94's dad saved his sister's life.

My aunt told me a story about my dad, who greatly dislikes his sister and is an all around asshole 98% of the time, calling her out of the blue one night while she was in college. She answered, he said he didn't know why but he had this urge to call her, to make sure she was okay. She told him she was fine and thanked him for calling to check on her.

She never told anyone else except me, and hopefully a therapist or two, but she was holding the bottle of pills she was planning to commit suicide with right when he called her. Twenty some years later and she's very happy with her decision to live.

4. kd5nrh literally dodged a bullet.

Forgot one; about 10 years ago, working security at a site about 50 miles from home, got off shift at midnight, and didn't bother to change out of uniform because I was only going to stop for gas. Two stations in the town I was working in were open after midnight, but it slipped my mind as I drove past the first one. Pulled into the other, (same brand, same gas price, same sort of dump entirely) and just didn't like something about it. Nobody else around but he clerk that I could see, but I decided to go back to the other one.

Topped off and headed back out of town, I get close to that station again. Three city cop cars, two deputies and a state trooper are outside blocking the road with guns drawn. Turns out a city cop walked in on a robbery. Dude put a bullet in his vest, and the store owner knocked the robber out cold with a bat before the cop could recover enough to get his gun out.

That would have been me, in a uniform with a nice shiny badge, but no body armor.

5. bliddick22's mom saved grandpa's life.

Not me, but my mother, saved my grandfathers life when he had a stroke in his chair in their living room.

We had all started to walk around the the development, when my mother, after about 50-75 meters from the house said, "I am going to go back and check on Dad." I went with her, and I nearly witnessed my grandfather die. He was on the chair, conscious, but unable to move or talk... Just looking at my mother with bulging eyes. She called 911 once, then twice when she felt that they were running late. Ambulance came, got him on the stretcher, but it was too wide to fit out the door. We ended up tearing the door frame off to get him out.

Because he was conscious, he actually remembers the ride to the hospital. He told us later that he heard the driver or someone say, there is not a chance that this guy lives. That was when I was around 5-6 years old. He is still alive to this day, more than a decade later.

At my mothers funeral, part of his speech was about how, without my mother, he would not have been able to spend time with her during her final years of life. And for that, he is eternally grateful.

6. MissingInAction21 would've died in a tsunami were it not for their mother's intuition.

In 2004, on Boxing Day. Not me but my mother. Family trip including all cousins and extended family on my dad's side to visit the coastal South of Sri Lanka on vacation, about 20 people in all.

Well planned trip, last moment my mother didn't want to go. No reason at all. None of us could get her to explain why but she refused to go. So we went inland on a different trip to see some other relatives.

Around midday, the entire extended family now on both sides were sitting shocked in front of the television watching the very same hotel we booked being washed away live by the tsunami.

To date, she still can't explain what she felt.

7. absolutelyrightnow's boyfriend had a feeling that saved his sister.

My boyfriend and I were visiting friends for a week in Phoenix. We girls were lounging at the pool while the guys were flexing their grilling skills. My boyfriend paused a moment, stood very still then told me to go get dressed, we had to go. Right now. I wanted to fuss but something told me not to. We drove straight through to San Antonio right to his parents very rural house. (before cell phones and they didn’t have a land line within a half mile)

Seconds before we arrived his little sister had jumped off of a rain barrel and landed on a metal spike that went straight up through her foot and into her leg. His dad was at work so there was no car available there. She was bleeding like crazy and his mother had just walked out and found her. I don’t know what spoke to him in Phoenix, but it would have been all bad if we had not arrived exactly when we did.

8. UnconditionalMay noped out of the jungle.

I was in the Amazon as the end to a 3 month solo trip around Latin America. Wanted to enjoy one last walk through the jungle before leaving so left my jungle lodge around 8am to walk down to a small river nearby.

I stop and close my eyes to listen to the sounds as the jungle is super loud with crickets, birds, insects etc. Almost immediately I got a weird feeling and felt really uncomfortable - which was weird because up until then I'd only felt peaceful and happy. When I opened my eyes, I realized everything had gone completely quiet which was definitely NOT normal and not something I had experienced in other rain forests I'd been to. It was bizarre. I immediately felt that I had to leave and fast.

After I dipped and got back to the jungle lodge, i told the tour guide what happened and he said it usually only gets quiet when there is a big predator close by - thanks but no thanks!

9. csr110977 didn't want a carpet THAT bad.

A few years ago, when I was 19 and studying abroad in Europe, and my friend and I decided to go to Turkey. It was our first time really traveling on our own without a group and we decided to walk around the square outside of the Blue Mosque. We felt very safe during the day and decided to see the city at night with the lights. As we were in the square, we were hounded by typical store owner's trying to sell us something.

Finally, most went away and as we were going back to our hotel, a younger guy approached us. He said he had a shop on the corner, which he pointed to with lots of souvenirs including carpets. I grew up with a lot of handmade, woven carpets from my parents travels to the middle east and Asia. I decided it would be a nice gift. So we follow him, when we get to what we thought was his shop, we stopped.

We started to walk in and he said not that one, the one around the corner. We poke our head around and sure enough see a store, only selling carpets. I started to get a slightly strange feeling but nothing overwhelming, so we followed him as we could see the store. When we walked in, about 13-15 other men were in the shop. They were pointing out carpets and showing us around and I started to get really uncomfortable.

My friend seemed completely at ease, so we followed the group around the bend to the other part of the store. In Turkey, it is common to be offered tea, so that part is not particularly odd, but the men, who were now circling us, were insistent that we have tea with them in the basement. I kept saying no but they were leading us towards steps, completely surround us. We got to the steps and my friend started walking down, my body began to sweat, my heart went crazy, and I never had such an overwhelming fear. I kept trying to think of how we could overpower these men.

I grabbed my phone, stopped in my tracks, and gasped. "Friend's name, we need to go right now. My mom just texted me asking why we aren't back at the hotel yet cause the map shows we're at this store. We're supposed to facetime with them in 10 minutes."

The men kind of look around and tell us we can have tea in less than that amount of time. I keep insisting that my parents are freaking out because they can tell were in the carpet store and not the hotel and that they will likely contact the embassy if we don't get going. They continued blocking the staircase. I told them that we would come for tea in the morning as I still really wanted a carpet and that we needed to get out of the store and back to facetime. It took a little persuading but they eventually opened a path for us to go to the door. One of them followed us back to the square insisting that we return/come back and see them. Of course, we didn't.

I have no idea if they were completely harmless or not but I had never had such an overwhelming feeling. They easily could've drugged us, placed us in carpets, and taken us out. My parents didn't actually have our location as my phone was on airplane mode. So who actually knows, on the other hand, I might've been paranoid, but it wasn't a situation I ever wanted to be in again. Once we were back at the hotel, she told me she was really scared too but that she thought I was fine so she went with it.

10. Delanium prevented another woman from being raped.

I was president of a club, and a guy who'd recently joined just set off my alarm bells, but he never did anything wrong. I still couldn't shake the feeling he was off. I asked my best friend, a pretty burly guy, to just keep an eye on him during a conference we went to.

Most of the club (minus me) went to a party at the conference, my best friend kept an eye on the weird guy for most of the night, and ended up stopping him from raping a passed out drunk girl.

I pretty much always trust my gut feelings now.

Edit: it was a Model UN, I'm a girl, the conferences were actual conferences lmao

11. DanBonham saved their family from a fire.

I smelled burning plastic early in the morning at my family cottage and almost went back to sleep (I was around 15), but got up to investigate. A socket on the outside of the building had caught fire and flames were shooting up the wall. The rest of my family was still sleeping and there wasn’t enough smoke for the alarms to go off. I ran and got the fire extinguisher, got my dad up, and put it in his hands and pointed him towards the fire. Stopped it and called the fire department.

12. MommaJess08 felt compelled to turn down a house and found out why later.

We were looking at houses a while back, and found one that was great location, would have been perfect size for us, and didn't appear to need any work other than new carpet, and stuff I wanted to do like painting and switching the it over from oil burning furnace. I just had a nagging feeling about it, and my husband agreed.

As much as we loved it something was off with it (I actually thought ghost or something silly like that 😂), and we ended up passing on it. I was still kicking myself about it until a few months later when it had a major electrical fire. The whole house and everything in it was a total loss, and the family that lived there barely got out alive.

13. laybytheoceans's tuition started in childhood.

When I was young (around 8 or 9 probably), I lived 3 blocks from a convenience store. It was the early 90s. My best friend and I convinced our parents to let us walk to the store alone to get some snacks. Important to add that the two blocks closest to the store are connected but the 3rd block we lived on was it's own unconnected neighborhood. So anyway, as we are walking back from the store, we are coming up to the first street and a truck drives by and stops on the side of the road in between the first and second block on our side if the road. I stopped and told my friend that we should go down the first street and go through the neighborhood, come back out the second street and then head to our 3rd street to avoid the truck.

She thought I was being stupid but I refused to keep walking on the main street so she followed me down the first road. We are now in the first neighborhood and about halfway between the first and second street when we see the truck slowly driving down the second street into the neighborhood. The driver sees us and immediately slams on the gas and turns his truck towards us on the street. We ran and hid in some bushes further into the neighborhood for about ten minutes. We heard the truck driving by back and forth for about the first five and then it was quiet so we started making our way out of the neighborhood towards the second street again.

Suddenly. Here comes the truck again slowly, sees us and guns it towards us again. We jumped over a fence into a back yard and started pounding on the back door. By the way this is a tuesday. Middle of the day during summer vacation... most people are at work. But miraculously, a man and woman open the door and let us in. The woman had just had a baby like a week before so they were home on leave.

They called the cops and my mom and the man went outside. He said the truck drove by and the man saw him standing outside and sped out of the neighborhood. Cops and my mom showed up minutes later and we gave a description and never heard anything about it again. Our parents just drove us to the convenience store from then on. My mom still talks about it to this day and how shocked she was that I had such a strong intuition at that age.

14. -toe-beans- caught a man with a roofie.

A guy definitely roofie'd my drink at a bar.

He was totally mild mannered and not creepy at all. Asked me how to sign up for karaoke and pick a song. Sat beside me and talked casually. Didn't touch me once.

But then he pointed to something behind my head to distract me. I looked away and looked back at him and he was looking away from me into the crowd of people. Was a very stupid way to distract someone, to point and then act like you didn't do anything as opposed to pretending to have thought you saw something.

Then, I saw him screwing one of those little canisters back shut on his keychain. I asked him what he kept in there to call him out. He was cold and expressionless as he began to slowly twist it back open and said there was nothing in there.

I stopped drinking my drink and he performed his song. Then I sang and he took off immediately after. It was really f*cked up and I'm glad he wasn't very smooth or idk what could've happened.

What always freaked me out was how normal he seemed (before he became suddenly cold and robotic when I called him out on that canister thing). But it made me realize, of course a rapist would seem normal - that's how they get close enough to you to attack you.

15. number1earner saved themselves from a mugging.

I was going to meet up with someone from marketplace to buy a phone and the feeling hit me so I called the woman and a man answered trying to play off the fact he's a man and I passed by where we were meeting at and it was dark and I heard voices in the background on the phone call. I never stopped the car and kept going. Pretty sure I saved myself from at the very least a mugging but learned a good lesson, always meet in a public place.

16. beastin01 saved themselves from being murdered.

I was walking to the barbershop, and for some reason, everything just felt off. I ignored the feeling but every step I took just made me feel like something wasn't right, so I decided to just go grab some food and come back. While I was eating I saw police cars and ambulances driving to around where I was before, it turns out there was a murder. Now I always listen to my gut feeling.

17. TennisBabel's mom knew something was up at the daycare.

My mom dropped my 3 year old brother off at daycare before she had to work in the morning. When she got to work she had this terrible feeling something was wrong with him. She ended up leaving work and drove to the daycare. She found the daycare lady inside sleeping while the daycare kids (including my brother) were running around the pool. My brother never went back to that daycare again.

18. GladPen hopes their former classmate is okay.

I was an unpopular kid, and I always wanted to go on sleepovers but it rarely happened. In 6th or 7th grade I get invited to this girls house for a birthday party. I am friendly with her but not close. I go to her house and I feel weird right away. Her mom and stepdad were sitting in the living room smoking, but being perfectly friendly. The whole night, I couldn't shake this feeling of oppressiveness, despair, and danger. I spent the evening keeping my guard up and keeping an eye out for the entire family, without any idea why.

At night the girl begs me to spend the night. Even though it hurt to say no when I could tell she was desperate, I lied and told her my parents wouldn't let me, when they said over the phone they would. A couple of months later, a student told me she had left the school and moved because her stepfather would molest her at night in her bed. I think of her often, and hope she wasn't hurt that night, and hope shes doing better - but Im glad I got out.

*my apostrophe key isn't working.

Edited to add: No, I didn't understand what was going on. I would have told somebody. I was also being creeped out by her otherwise cute brother, which I just remembered. And there are multiple posts like this, not a repost..which is very sad.

19. kornfanja666 has cosmic timing.

I went out with my best friend on new years last year and were having drinks with her friends when I realized I was out of cigarettes. I left for a few minutes to walk over and grab a pack and ended up talking to a homeless guy for a while, and when I went over to the entrance of the bar she was outside and said something mean to me for no reason and walked off. I was confused so I decided it would be good if I took a walk to let her cool off and then figure out what she was upset about.

I was going to walk down the street for a bit but something told me to turn left, walking behind the bar and then turning to the side of the bar when I see a girl laying down on the sidewalk and people walking by her. As I'm walking over to help I realize its my friend and she's not very conscious. She was probably drugged while I was getting smokes and who knows what would've happened if I hadn't decided to go that way

Scares the shit out of me.

20. volcanic-sass's dad saved their life.

My dad had to go to court to settle a way overdue payment for the place he worked at. He was going to take me with him so I can be more exposed to the adult world so to speak. However that meant he would have to leave the office back door unlocked so the rest of the staff could clock in. He suddenly didn't feel right about it and decided to have me man the office instead. He got T-boned outside the courthouse on the passenger side of the car that day. The car was totaled and I would have gotten severely hurt if I was there.

Edit1: wow didn't expect people to love this story so much. To help clear some things up we both first traveled together to his office to unlock the door. He got out of the car, unlocked the back door and When he came back to the car that's when he decided to tell me to stay at his office. It literally "delayed" him by only the few seconds it took for me to get out of said car.

If your holiday vibe has been more chaotic year-end breakdown than festive celebration, you are far from alone. The pressure of this time of year sets up plenty of opportunities for emotional dysfunction and failure, and luckily, social media serves as a medium to remind us we're far from alone in this.

If you're currently basking in that bizarre purgatory feeling that befalls us between Christmas and New Years, feeling slightly disappointed or embarrassed at how your holidays went down (or even your full 2019), just know that you're light years from alone.

Plenty of people have been biffing it this week, and many of them have shared their glorious holiday failures with the entire thirsty voyeuristic internet.

Here are just 15 people who had a worse Christmas (week) than you, drink it up my friend.

1. This mom who met Zendaya and confused her with another actress.

2. The family who lost their holiday Mac and Cheese.

3. This deeply unfortunate gift mix-up.

4. This dog who couldn't reach their holiday meal.

5. This Christmas tree that lost a fight with a dog.

6. This traveler victimized by Uber helicopter prices.

7. Kris Jenner missing Kim's speech due to technology issues.

8. This son of divorce trying to navigate the holidays.

9. The man who received two left sandals for Christmas.

10. The child who elbowed his gingerbread house into oblivion.

11. This person who paid full price for a tester bottle.

12. The homophobe who lost an argument in time for the holidays.

13. Sharon Stone getting blocked from New Years lovin'.

14. This skater who ended 2019 with a wipeout.

15. This little girl traumatized by her Christmas gift.

Kim Kardashian clapped back at a fake news story that's so ridiculous, you have to laugh.

Early this morning, Kim tweeted sent out the rare correction via Twitter:

Um, I'm sorry... JFK's shirt? Pardonez-moi?

Let's rewind a bit. You might remember how last week, Kim came under fire for buying her daughter North West Michael Jackson's old jacket and hat for Christmas. Like, why buy a kid the $65,000+ accessories of an alleged child predator? What ever happened to a simple Furby, you know?

There was uproar about the MJ gifts. So apparently, a prankster decided to make a fake Kim K Instagram Story saying Kim had also gotten her daughter the shirt President John F. Kennedy was wearing when he was assassinated in 1969.

Here's the screenshot of the, again, very fake Kim Kardashian story about JFK's shirt:

Someone at Refinery29 was covering the MJ gifts and apparently came across the fake screenshot in their travels. They posted it in their coverage, with a few sentences about the ridiculous gift.

To be fair, it's a pretty good fake. It's written in the font Kim often uses on her Stories and seems like her writing style.

BuzzFeed writer Nina Mohan did us all a solid by posting screenshots of the R29 story before it got deleted.

R29 wrote all about the MJ gifts, then added this:

Perhaps even more surprising, though, was that she also gave North the shirt President John F. Kennedy was wearing when he was shot and killed.

Another part of the story read:

What is North West going to do with JFK's bloody shirt? And why isn't it in a museum?

Reader: it is. R29 continued:

The visual of the shirt posted on her stories is jarring — and raises questions about why anyone would give a child something so violent. But regardless of the motivation behind the gifts, one thing is certain: Kardashian West is building one hell of a fashion archive for her daughter.

Iconic!

Kim apparently saw the R29 story and didn't want to take it lying down. But let's be serious: she probably also realized that New Year's Eve is one of the slowest news days of the year, and her tweeting about such an egregious (yet hilarious?) error would definitely get her some news coverage.

So to recap: Kim Kardashian did not buy her daughter JFK's bloody shirt. She did buy her Michael Jackson's bedazzled jacket and makeup-smeared hat. As if one's weirder than the other.

And of course, plenty of people are predicting the R29 writer will be fired, which is probably true, but only because media organizations are falling apart all around us.

But let's go easy on the writer, shall we? If it weren't for this mistake, we wouldn't have this hilarious correction from Kim — and this bizarro story to talk about on a slow news day. Happy New Year!

I think we can all agree this past year was dumb as hell. To celebrate its end, Rachel Millman, host of the Wrestlesplania podcast, asked Twitter to share the "really stupid but really funny" things they did this year.

And boy, are people delivering.

1. Rachel shared her own dumb but funny moment: an attempt to take a chair to the head a la WWE wrestlers.

2. Nothing wrong with a little high-protein pie.

3. It's nice to see neighbors checking up on each other these days.

4. Walking around pants-less the day after his wedding? Kilty as charged.

5. I mean, we've all been there.

6. How many cars have been destroyed by phone malfeasance?

7. Best $100 anyone's ever spent.

8. You coulda shot your leg off.

9. Maybe he left it next to his fedora.

10. Weird flex but okay.

11. Easy mistake to make.

12. Even muggers understand what a nightmare the DMV is.

13. Is this what people do when they stay in?

14. Violence is never the answer.

15. This is more of a PSA for the rest of us than anything.

16. Well, no country wants undocumented studs running amok.

17. He probably gets that all the time.

18. Hopefully the parent could relate.

19. The dog really is the cherry on top.

20. He went poopy in his pants :[

21. OOF!

22. And finally, this might be the dumbest one yet.

We've all made lofty, star-studded New Year's resolutions and we've probably all also broken one or two (or all) of them...

It's relatively easy to declare that the coming year is going to be the 365 days during which you dominate your industry and personal life and all your dreams will come true while the champagne is flowing and the glitter top hats are spinning. Unfortunately, we all know that setting goals and accomplishing them are two very different tasks. R.I.P., the year I was supposed to become a teen pop star/horse veterinarian.

According to most self-help advice, setting resolutions that are attainable and realistic are usually the most successful. Small, short-term goals can often lead to the most big picture success whereas staring into a massive void of endless opportunities can be pretty daunting. Of course, there are the classics such as working out more and eating more vegetables, but one Twitter user suggested starting with what you definitely aren't going to do in 2020.

And the internet was all about it. While you decide what you want your 2020 to bring you, here are the habits that people plan to break in their next trip around the sun.

1. This one's a classic.

2. Don't be all talk but no action.

3. But waking up is hard!

4. So...don't buy the entire bar shots?

5. Self care isn't just bubble baths and manicures!

6. Overthinking is a curse!

7. Believe in yourself, kids.

8. Cut out toxic people!

9. Failure can be a gift--ask JK Rowling!

10. The whole world doesn't need to know your whole life.

11. Don't wreck yourself before the world does!

12. Eyes on the prize, baby.

13. Live in the *moment.*

14. Positive vibes fuel more positive vibes!

15. Wow this sounds great.

16. Forge your own path!

17. Everyone needs to be a little selfish.

18. Reading is knowledge and knowledge is power.

19. Save your kindness for the people who count!

20. Don't worry, be happy.

21. Date people with conviction.

22. It's never too late!

Santa may be done making a list and checking it twice, but now it's everybody else's turn. The new year means at least pretending to want to be a better person with better habits as you switch out calendars.

Here's hoping you can keep your resolution until at least January 5th.

1. "Hahaha" is the new "lol" anyway.

2. Santa Claus is shaking.

3. Dream big.

4. Stealthiness is a skill.

5. Honesty is the best policy.

6. Good one (!)

7. Just you wait.

8. Good quality tweet.

9. Then when are we supposed to tweet?

10. Perfect logic.

11. Get that heart rate up.

12. Sounds good, I think?

13. A good resolution is to learn about punctuation.

14. Timeless.

15. Creative writing.

16. Always be archiving.

17. Everything in moderation.

18. Make it rain.

19. See you did there.

20. Be realistic.

Having kids can be hard on a marriage. Your sleep schedule is quickly dismantled by a cooing baby and the general stress of keeping a tiny person alive, date nights transform into potty training, and any semblance of sexuality feels like it's dried up into a ball of snot.

That being said, children can be wonderful, and many couples bond over their overwhelming love for their kids. The trick is finding a way to balance the devotion for parenting with a continued commitment to spicing up married life.

In a recent post on the Am I The A*shole subreddit, a dad asked if he was wrong for upsetting his wife when he told their young daughter he loves her "more than anything."

AITA for saying “I love you more than anything” to my daughter in front of my wife

OP shared that his 3-year-old daughter sometimes expresses anxiety that he'll stop loving her when she makes mistakes.

My daughter is 3, and sometimes gets scared I’ll stop loving her when she does something bad(for no good reason mind you, I make sure she always knows why I’m upset, and that I’m mad at her actions, not her). Today she bumped a glass off the table and started crying.

When OP's daughter recently knocked over a glass of water and started crying, he comforted her by assuring that he loves her more than anything.

She asked if I still love her and I said “I love you more than anything” and gave her a kiss. My wife was watching and stormed off. I made sure my daughter was fine and cleaned up the glass and went to go see what was going on.

When OP's wife heard him say he loved their daughter "more than anything," she immediately stormed off and started crying.

My wife was crying and calling me an a*shole who doesn’t love her (I guess I have 2 irrational 3 years olds now). I said of course I love her and asked why she was wigging out.

When OP checked on his wife, she expressed anxiety that he loved their daughter more than her.

She said that because I said the above phrase to my daughter, it meant she didn’t mean as much to me. Is this really something I’m not supposed to say? My mother said it to me, and my dad didn’t freak out.

tabimarieexo thinks OP's wife needs therapy, given her response.

Dude... NTA. Your wife needs therapy STAT! That’s not a normal response.

SuchASpecialSnFlake said it's normal for couples to have scuffs if their connection feels supplanted by the arrival of kids, but this type of reaction is misplaced.

It can be somewhat normal for one parent to feel jealousy and loss of a bond with their SO when children come. The outburst itself is a bit much but I've seen/heard of the idea itself plenty of times.

Kineth thinks OP was completely without fault in this situation.

NTA

Your wife/her mom shouldn't be competing with your daughter. Surely she can comprehend why a parent would say that to their child. It doesn't mean you love her any less. It was meant to console your daughter.

Bexickle think OP's condescending and dismissive nature fuels this dynamic.

ESH because I think there is more going on beneath the surface. You posted a story in which your wife seems obviously irrational, and you still couldn't resist the opportunity to take a dig at her on top of that. Seems like you're not helping this dynamic.

pullbang thinks OP wife's reaction may have been overdone, but the concept of putting your partner first is healthier long-term.

NAH... not going to be popular but hey. My wife comes first for me. Then my kids. I love my wife more than anything in the world. There was a time when she put the kids first in our relationship and it caused a lot of problems in our relationship. We went to therapy. Took a year or so to get it all right, we both are each others top priority, and it should be this way. If your relationship isn’t as good as it can be the kids feel it. Things start to fall apart little by little.

Some people are ok with becoming roommates and compartmentalism their relationships but I’m not. I didn’t marry her to be my friend till the kids are gone. Then we can be each others husband and wife. THIS DOES NOT MEAN OUR KIDS ARE NOT THE HIGHLIGHT OF OUR LIVES! We love them unconditionally and ridiculously. But we take care of “us” first.

As for the outburst that’s a little out of sorts, she may be having some issues and everyone that suggested therapy is totally correct. In fact if all of you are seeing a mental health professional periodically in your life you should.

Vastellan thinks the situation is more complex than people are giving it credit for.

NAH

As other have mentioned, this is something that you two should definitely work out together, but it's sad how fast everyone is to throw her under the bus.

Having your first child is a huge game changer. It's possible that your wife is missing the honeymoon period when she was the apple of your eye, or perhaps she's feeling a little neglected and finally snapped. If you haven't been doing so, maybe it's time to start leaving your daughter with grandparents or a sitter and having a regular date night.

All in all, it sounds like OP and his wife need to have a talk about their relationship and how they're going to navigate personal time and expressions of love towards each other and their daughter, so these kinds of melt-downs don't continue.