A group of kids learn President Obama's policy on bees.

Forget foreign policy, President Obama's biggest problems were domestic when a group of children interrupted his reading of Where The Wild Things Are by screaming about bees at the White House Easter Egg Roll. The President tried to quell their shrieks by replying "Bees are good, they won't land on you," which didn't help at all. He's the nerd in a movie who shows up to study group only to find an out-of-control frat party in his house.

My favorite moment is when a kid shouts, "they're scary!" summing up the ordeal. If it was anyone other than the President, those kids would have scattered at the first sign of trouble. At least they were more respectful than Obama's opposition in Congress.

This little boy hasn't quite got the hang of rolling an Easter egg.

As a younger brother, I relate too much to this video. I was much like Blaine here, forced to compete with my brother from a young age. Being three years younger, however, my poor babylike coordination meant I was no match. Still, I'd try my hardest, and inevitably wind up stepping on my egg, being momentarily confused, and then standing there crying in my plaid cargo pants.

What I'm saying is, this kid will grow up to be a blogger. Sorry Blaine.

This is one of those 29-second videos that's worth watching all the way through.

This is how you win a fight: as fast as you can. It's a piece of cake.

A series of photos commissioned by 'LIFE' magazine in 1947 have come to light, showing devoted seeing-eye cat, Baby, and his blind owner.

Baby the seeing-eye cat and his owner Carolyn Swanson, 1947. Photo: Loran F. Smith http://t.co/l36X10xisBpic.twitter.com/n36akkD9Al
— LIFE (@LIFE) April 7, 2015

Cats have a reputation as the most untrainable of domestic animals. Carolyn Swanson decided to turn conventional wisdom on its head and trained her cat to lead her around town on a leash.

Meet the award-winning seeing-eye #cathttp://t.co/IUyGNSmBHP via @LIFEpic.twitter.com/iGDq0i39BK

— Ivan Ramljak (@ramljak_ivan) April 7, 2015

These pictures are being shared now by Life.com, for our amusement, but no one is sure what they were taken for at the time. And not an enormous amount is known about Swanson's reasons for turning Baby from a lap cat to a service animal, but there is a newspaper clipping that shows Baby receiving a medal for "faithful devotion to his blind mistress."

Cats. They can do anything...they just don't feel like it.

That should cover you for the week, Mom & Dad.(Via)

We complain about the parents posting their pics of their kids all the time, but one day those same parents will serve an important role. When those kids grow up and stop being adorable, we need their parents to smack them down when they start smearing their bratty, self-obsessed crap all over our feeds. Here are some moms and dads who are making Facebook a better, and more entertaining place for the rest of us.

Any kid using words like "seshing" unironically is in need of some strict parenting.(Via)

A good parent builds confidence by constantly insulting a child's genitals.(Via)

Sophie's mum has a heavy finger sitting on Sophie's "unfriend" button.(Via)

Peace out to you too, mom. Peace out to you too.(Via)

Please mother, think of more. We're all behind you on this. (Via)

But Moooom, you know Thursday's the day I drink real cheap! (Via)

Mom's not giving out any "Participation" trophies. It's kill or be unloved. (Via)

And sometimes it's the kids' friends who end up getting owned.(Via)

Where schools fail, Dad succeeds...in public humiliation. (Via)

This is like the opposite of a Wanted poster. (Via)

How has Dad not gone from "in a relationship" to "single" all these years? (Via)

Not that clean! (Via)

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The Internet closed the generation gap far too quickly. (Via)

Jesus was the Carpenter. One of the apostles maybe?(Via)

The best career motivator is to never get torn a new one by your mom again.(Via)

Being a mom doesn't make you blind to when someone throws you a softball. (Via)

Dad just can't let the baby fly the nest.(Via)

She's been getting a vibe off you. She needed to draw the boundaries.(Via)

Stop acting shocked. Alcohol is responsible for nearly all human life on this planet.(Via)

Don't interrupt your kid. He's clearly high as a kite.(Via)

Don't dare her, Mom. And don't look at her Snapchats, either.(Via)

There should be a law against parents using words like "fap."(Via)

You really want him crying all over the power tools? They'll rust! (Via)

Honesty is a virtue in that household.(Via)

She just knows that the Internet has eaten into a lot of the profits.(Via)

Change "feeling loved" to "feeling hassled."(User Submission)

This is one easily frightened thug. (via)

Nice bedtime story dad. (via)

Dad has regrets. Well, one regret. (Via)

The drugs impaired his ability to understand how social networking works. (Via)

There'd be fewer pimp daddies with more anti-pimp mommies like this one.(Via)

Mom's got that shit on lock-down.(Via)

It's called "I Empty The Dishwasher And Cat Box Every Night
Since You Broke Up With Me." Get it right, Dad.(Via)

Kids today. Always trying to look like they lifted themselves up by their own bootstraps. (Via)

Sam likes what he likes. Let love flourish! (Via)

The fame went to his head. (Via)

And he remembers it fondly, apparently. (Via)

You are your father's son, even in ways you wish you never knew.(Via)

Then run your left hand under water because you just got burned.(Via)

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Thanksgiving is hell when a liberal teen is in the house.(Via)

His Facebook life then?(Via)

When you and your mom compete over meth consumption, time to leave Facebook.(Via)

SUCK IT, APATOSAURUS!

We here at Someecards will always strive for the greatest scientific accuracy.(via reddit)

The Brontosaurus (Greek for "Thunder Lizard") has spent a century as the greatest dinosaur that never existed. Anyone who watched the Flintstones or ever argued about which dinosaurs would win if you attached lasers to them knows this to be true (Brontos could carry so many more lasers than a T-Rex, and their necks would let them shoot over walls, so it's kind of a no-brainer). Plus, its name is Thunder Lizard. It was also the dinosaur that everyone older than 7 would sneer at you for mentioning, because it never existed. Until today.

Brontosaurus vs Apatosaurus; Ajax vs. Excelsus; the rumble in the prehistoric jungle.

1897 painting depicting a semi-aquatic Bronto and a grazing Diplodocus.

Scientific names for species aren't usually exciting things, but check this out: when paleontologist Othniel Charles Marsh was first asked to evaluate some fossils sent to him by a colleague in 1877, he named it Apatosaurus ajax. Badass. When Marsh went out into the field himself in 1879 and found an 80-ft spine and gigantic pelvis, however, he decided he had found Brontosaurus excelsus. Gnarly.

This didn't sit well with Edward Drinker Cope, Marsh's rival, and so the Marsh-Cope Bone Wars ensued. Radical. By the early 1900s, Marsh had been defeated (largely because a good Bronto skull has never been found) and Brontosaurus excelsus was reclassified as Apatosaurus excelsus, giving older siblings everywhere something to feel smug about knowing.

Marsh's Bronto. The body was reclassified asApatosaurus, the head as a Brachiosaur.
(via Wikipedia)

Of course, Thunder Lizard is a much cooler name for a dinosaur than Deceptive Reptile, which is what Apatosaurus means, so it stuck around in pop culture.

That fan base seemed to pay off, as many voices have called for a reopening of the case. Those calls have been answered by Prof. Emanuel Tschopp of the New University of Lisbon in Portugal. Prof. Tschopp and his team looked at 477 individual specimens of long-neck species, including Apatosaurs and Diplodocuses.

What they found was that the skull fragments they did have for the former Brontosaurs indicated they had bigger nasal chambers and head and neck joints. This is important because it means they made higher-pitched honks and would have used their heads to communicate differently than Apatosaur species.

Indeed, they were in a class all their own. Well, a family. Well, no, that's too big, but a genus. Yes, a genus all their own. Brontosaurus excelsus is back. Let's break out the hypothetical lasers and let the schoolyard arguments begin.

Watch this boxer dog fall asleep sucking a pacifier like a wittle baby.

This video made me yawn, in a nice way. There's nothing better than curling up on the couch, listening to a lullaby and drifting off to dream land. But I can't do it without my Binky!

I don't know if those snores were added in post-editing, but this sweet little dog sucking that plastic nipple and slowly falling asleep is so freaking cute, I don't want to poke holes in it. Shh. Nap time.

Claudetteia Love and her friends are boycotting the prom in protest over what they say is discrimination.

Ms. Love.(via Facebook)

Claudetteia Love is a senior at Carroll High School in Monroe, LA. An honor student, she has been openly gay for her entire high school career, and claims that it has not caused her any major issues. So it came as quite a surprise when she suddenly found herself being persecuted for her sexuality by the principal himself.

It all happened when Love announced her plans to wear a tuxedo to her senior prom. School officials told her that she would be banned if she did, because that violates the school's dress code. Principal Patrick Taylor told her mother, "Girls wear dresses and boys wear tuxes, and that's the way it is."

Now Love and her friends are boycotting the prom in protest. She told the NY Daily News:

"It hurt my feelings. The four years I've been there I've always dressed the way I dress. I've always been open. And no one has had a problem with it. But when the time comes around to celebrate everything I accomplished in high school — I was told that I couldn't do it because of the way I am."

In addition to her friends, others have come forward to support Love, including Monroe City School Board President Rodney McFarland, who is challenging Principal Taylor's decision. He told the News Star, "As far as I know there is no Monroe City School Board policy saying what someone has to wear to attend the prom. You can't just go making up policies."

Would this image be ruined by one set of pants?(stock photo)

Love's sister Mignon, also a student at Carroll High, says that she has overheard faculty talking about the rule in a way that suggests it is about discrimination. She told the News Star: "It's not about how they dress. They're judging them. They are at school talking about being gay is a sin."

The way I see it, there's only one sin here: limiting a student's right to free expression. These school administrators should be ashamed of themselves. Carroll High is a school with a failing performance score, and the faculty have regularly trotted Love and other high achieving students in front of the School Board and other groups to make them look better. She'll even represent the school at an upcoming Louisiana Scholar's Banquet. To take advantage of a student like that, then turn around and shame her for reasons of petty bigotry is a betrayal that reflects poorly on the school at every level. Let's hope this gets resolved before the prom on April 24th. If that night comes around and Ms. Love isn't on the dance floor in her tux, it'll send a dangerous message to LGBT youth everywhere.

1. Ron Paul's Son To Compete With George W. Bush's Brother For Right To Lose To Bill Clinton's Wife

Sen. Rand Paul announced that he is entering the 2016 Republican primaries today, writing in a post on his website: "I am running for president to return our country to the principles of liberty and limited government." As of publication time, he has not yet conceded defeat and thrown his support behind Jeb Bush, though that is expected any time now.

So far Rand Paul passes my ideological litmus test of not being an elderly career political grifter.

— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) April 7, 2015

2. Yet Another World's Oldest Person Mysteriously Dies

Gertrude Weaver—the 116-year-old Arkansas woman who took the title of World's Oldest Person last week after the death of 117-year-old Japanese woman Misao Okawa—barely had a chance to enjoy the perks of her new distinction before passing away at 10 am yesterday morning. This shouldn't come as any surprise— that World's Oldest Person group really lives and parties hard.

I've gotta stop getting so attached to every World's Oldest Person.

— Alex Baze (@bazecraze) April 7, 2015

3. Everybody's Favorite Minor Taxonomic Distinction Has Been Restored

It turns out that there is likely a large enough genetic distinction between two branches of Sauropod suborder that we can get away with using the word "Brontosaurus" without some pedantic jerk correcting us and explaining at length that the correct taxonomic term is "Apatosaurus." Today is a dark day for those people, but a good day for those of us who don't like learning anything new after third grade.

So brontosaurus may be a planet again? Science news is confusing.

— Phil Plait (@BadAstronomer) April 7, 2015

4. Our Future Alien Overlords Will Dominate Us With Their Massive Size

Alien species—such as the one that will inevitably dominate and subjugate humanity for several millennia beginning in about twenty or thirty years—are likely to weigh about 650 pounds, according to a University of Barcelona cosmologist who gets to make unfalsifiable claims about the universe and have them reported on as though they are actual news.

@JohnLyonTweets aliens love butt stuff. they're like, we're here to exploit your natural resources and probe your sexy butts

— Viktor Winetrout, Jr (@Cpin42) April 6, 2015

5. Mitt Romney Is Better At Predicting Basketball Standings Than Predicting His Own Political Future

It turns out that failed presidential candidate Mitt Romney is actually pretty good at predicting NCAA standings. After picking six of the teams in the Elite Eight and all four teams in the Final Four, he ended up in the 99.98th percentile of ESPN.com's Tournament Challenge. I guess he's not one of the 1%. He's one of the .02%.

I don't care WHO wins the #FinalFour, as long as the players don't receive any financial compensation!

— Eli Braden (@EliBraden) April 5, 2015

Why should the Paleolithic Era get all of the trendy dieting attention when there are plenty of other historic time periods with great nutritional guidelines to follow?

Get the body you had in the 80s with a diet from the 20s.

Try some of these to get ready for bikini season:

1. The French Revolution Diet: Alternate days of starving and eating cake.

2. The Y2K Diet: Only eat canned goods that have been stored in a bunker for 15 years.

3. The Ice Age Diet: Only eat frozen foods. Don't move.

4. The Colonial Era Diet: Take other people's food and eat it without asking.

5. The Gold Rush Diet: Everything you eat must be found in a stream.

6. The Mesozoic Era Diet: This was the heyday of the dinosaurs, so sustain yourself exclusively on dinosaur-shaped frozen children's chicken nuggets.

7. The Ming Dynasty Diet: Only eat foods that naturally grew in the areas of Asia ruled by the Ming Dynasty from 1368-1644.

8. The “Dynasty" Diet: Only eat while wearing big shoulder pads and lots of gold jewelry.

9. The 1950s Diet: Only eat when a man says you can (this could also be called the 1940s Diet, 1930s Diet, 1920s Diet, etc.)

10. The Renaissance Diet: Just get fat.

Rand Paul is selling some hilarious items to raise money for his candidacy.

A trendy man wearing modern eyewear. (via randpaul.com)

Kentucky Senator Rand Paul announced his bid for the Presidency this morning, but his online store is far more interesting than boring old politics. I can't tell if he has an amazing sense of humor or is totally genuine, but either way, let's explore the strange world of Rand Paul paraphernalia.

I stand on with Rand. (via randpaul.com)

Show support for your candidate by walking all over him! Not only are flip flops are a fun, breezy form of footwear, they also refer to a politician who constantly changes their position about critical issues. These are an all-around solid campaign product.

I sit stand with Rand. (via randpaul.com)

Although Dr. Rand Paul is an opthamologist, he is always looking out for your feet. Ideally, you'd wear your Rand Paul Flip Flops while resting your feet on these snazzy Rand Paul Car Mats to double up on your support of Rand Paul's foot fetish.

Mr. Dr. Future President's eye chart. (via randpaul.com)

Should Rand Paul become President, a mandate will be sent across the land stating that all eye charts be replaced with these official Rand Paul eye charts and everyone will have 20/20 vision.*
*pure speculation

Urban Outfitters gave the design a firm "no thanks." (via randpaul.com)

Rand Paul combined his extensive knowledge of both fashion and internet memes to create this stunning t-shirt. Young, hip Republican bros and the women who love them will be snatching them up in droves. Get one while you still can.

Keep your privates private. (via randpaul.com)

Is the government spying on us? Probably! Buy an official Rand Paul Spy Cam Blocker to ensure your right to browse the internet without letting the NSA see how poorly you've been doing on your latest diet attempt.

I also have a lot of stuff I'd like to give away that no one wants.

(via Obvious Plant)

It's tax season, and I've been looking to make a few deductible donations to a charity. I also have a lot of crap that Goodwill said is "gross" and "no one would ever want to reuse." Thankfully, Jeff Wysaski showed me the light: you can donate anything if you're creative enough.

(via Obvious Plant)

(via Obvious Plant)

(via Obvious Plant)

(via Obvious Plant)

(via Obvious Plant)

You can see all of Jeff's donations on his Tumblr.

A Swedish mycologist found a GoPro on the forest floor. The memory card was intact, and contained this video. Warning: it'll make you dizzy.

There are two important lessons about GoPros to take from this video. The first is that they deserve their reputation as action cameras. A camera has to be pretty hardy to fall from almost 10,000 feet and not be pulverized. The second lesson is that you still have to hold on to them. Or attach them to yourself somehow. Otherwise, your awesome action video will turn into a dizzying, terrifying, plummeting tribute to your own carelessness. Worse, you won't even get to see it. That is, unless a stranger uploads it to YouTube.

Speaking of which, if you know the skydivers in this video, let them know. Now that they've been humiliated, they should get their camera back.