Tinkerbell was seen in her day as a symbol of entitlement, "celebutante" privilege, and the decline of American morals. All that seems so quaint now.

In honor & memory of Tinkerbell I'm dedicating my Instagram page to her today. I hope you enjoy the memories of my sweet angel We've been through so much together. She lived a long, beautiful, luxurious & exciting life. #RIPTinkerbell
A photo posted by Paris Hilton (@parishilton) on Apr 21, 2015 at 4:15pm PDT

Tinkerbell Hilton, 14, passed away in California yesterday of old age. Star of The Simple Life and scene-stealer of a million paparazzi shots, the shivering, yipping, and (according to rumors) occasionally NBC producer-nipping Chihuahua ushered in an age of couture handbag dogs.

Tinkerbell hosting Saturday Night Live & #Killingit in the opening monologue. #LikeABoss #SNL #RIPTinkerbell

A video posted by Paris Hilton (@parishilton) on Apr 21, 2015 at 10:04pm PDT

Canines under five pounds everywhere nervously applauded Tinkerbell's legacy, allowing them to finally leave their houses and embrace public life in the protection of everyday Hilton fans' knockoff Coach purses.

To everyone who keeps asking if Tinkerbell is alive. Here she is, the original queen herself!
A video posted by Paris Hilton (@parishilton) on Oct 7, 2014 at 9:21pm PDT

Although Tinkerbell's show The Simple Life was seen as raunchy and envelope-pushing at the time, a rewatching of the dog's oeuvre reveals how tame and, frankly, professional the dog's pioneering reality TV show was in comparison to reality television of the 2010s.

Where our journey began... #TheSimpleLife #FirstDogRealityStar #RIPTinkerbell

A photo posted by Paris Hilton (@parishilton) on Apr 21, 2015 at 4:53pm PDT

Other, more shameless dogs have since followed in Tink's spastic footsteps, like that preening blowhard who pisses on Lisa Vanderpump's arm every five minutes on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Oh, and let's not forget that trollop "Mr. Amazing," the world's smallest pomeranian that Hilton just bought a few months ago.

Raise your hand if Paris Hilton's dog has written more books than you. (via Amazon)

Often underestimated, many people forget Tinkerbell is a published author, having written The Tinkerbell Diaries: My Life Tailing Paris Hilton. Not content to write a standard celebrity biography, Tinkerbell made sure the publishers put "FICTION/HUMOR" on the title to differentiate it from her other, more historical works.

My heart is broken I am so sad & devastated. After 14 amazing years together my baby Tinkerbell has passed away of old age. I feel like I've lost a member of my family. She was such a special & incredible soul. We went through so much together. I can't believe she's gone. I will miss her & think about her for the rest of my life. I love you Tinky, you are a Legend & will never be forgotten. #RIPTinkerbell

A photo posted by Paris Hilton (@parishilton) on Apr 21, 2015 at 2:58pm PDT

You shall be missed, Tinkerbell. By reality television, where you ushered in the first true golden age since The Real World, by handbag makers who realized that all these dogs pissing in their bags meant their idiot owners needed new bags all the time, and by me. And possibly Paris Hilton and the fleet of tiny canines you left as a legacy.

This video shows a lot of tiny cute kids freaking out over "Star Wars," just like you did.

There have been a lot of great viral videos lately in the "Reacting to the Star Wars Trailer" genre. Even though I'm excited for the movie, I'm pretty sure a video of me watching the trailer would just show a dead-eyed witch with her mouth hanging open.

But babies! Babies watch with their very souls, as this compilation shows. They could all, of course, be watching anything or just reacting to lights and sounds and sweeping music. They certainly don't have any nostalgic attachment to Chewbacca, though a giant bear-like creature probably looks like a fun playmate. Who cares, it's cute as hell!

Bottom-line: we're all excited about Star Wars, even though apparently the theatre will be filled with crying children.

Celebrity fitness instructor Cassey Ho photoshopped herself in this video to show the absurd ideals we have for women's bodies.

I love this video. In addition to the social commentary about women's bodies, the use of CGI to simulate real-life photoshopping is incredible. Cassy Ho is a fitness instructor and social media phenomenon who deals with a lot of negative backlash from insecure Internet dum-dums.

Ughhhhhhhhhhhhh. (via YouTube)

A "perfect" female body means having a large chest, a big butt, and zero body fat. Since fatty tissue is what makes up both appendages, this body type is not possible unless you are a character in Grand Theft Auto, or you've been plasticly surgerized.

Everyone is obsessed with voicing their unwanted opinion about women's bodies. Whether it's a creepy catcalling dude or a spiteful Instagram troll, sometimes it feels impossible to bear the burden of your blood and guts being housed in a woman skin-suit.

Cassey Ho's fitness inspired body positivity is exactly what we need right now. She even got meta and posted comments she received in response to her photoshopped body:

Wow guys. The response on yesterday's post was moving, incredible, and shocking all at once. Thank you. I couldn't have asked for anything more. I'm happy that many of you clicked over to watch my short film when you saw my new "perfect" body. You experienced the most powerful video I have ever created. You saw me strip down my confidence and self esteem. You saw me raw. Hurt. And vulnerable. For those who haven't seen it yet, please click on the link in my bio. I wanted to post again because there was a weird phenomenon that happened when I posted this photoshopped picture. On the very same photo, I got some people praising me and others degrading me. What worries me is this: 1. That some people think this is real and that it should be "goals." 2. That some people still think it's not good enough. It's tough knowing what's real and what's not when magazine covers and music videos are photoshopped (yes, music videos), Instagram pics are photoshopped, and so many women are getting surgery. How are we to know what kind of beauty can be naturally achieved when everything around us is so deceiving? If you want to know what you can do to help stop body shaming, all I ask is that you share the video with at least 1 person. That's all. After countless days of shooting, weeks of editing, visual effects, and lots of hard work from a team of amazing people, my short film was turned into a reality. Thank you to James Chen, James Jou, and @smashboxcosmetics for helping me bring this to life. #madeatsmashbox I hope you guys liked it. I love you. Stay beautiful.
A photo posted by Cassey Ho (@blogilates) on Apr 17, 2015 at 5:05pm PDT

These comments reinforce why she made the video in the first place. Good things are happening though! I mean, if supermodels are showing their stretch marks, we're on the right track.

Two Dallas police officers and a good samaritan rescued a man from a burning car.

Oh my goodness, this is terrifying. An man is pulled from his SUV by two Dallas Police officers and a civilian bystander while flames rise up from the engine. They successfully drag him to safety, and he appears to be conscious, but holy crap. My heart is beating so fast. I am having a panic attack.

I can't wait for Google to perfect driverless cars so we can recline in the back seat while watching Full House or browsing Tinder at high speeds because nothing is better than exploring the information superhighway while being driven down a paved highway.

Every month, Netflix makes a whole bunch of it's subscribers extremely happy by adding great movies and super-addictive television shows. At the same time, it makes a bunch of other people super bummed out by yanking away their security blankets. Here's your guide to who's what and why:

Who's Happy?

Fans of unrelenting chipperness. Reese Witherspoon and her enormous tooth-filled smile began wheedling their way into America's heart 14 years ago with Legally Blonde, which—along with its less-inspired but equally zippy follow-up, Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde—begins streaming 24/7 on May 1.

"hahaha man its not about plot or 'figuring it out', it's predicated on dream logic, it's about facades" - me about legally blonde 2
— thomas violence (@thomas_violence) July 5, 2014

Beard enthusiasts and duck haters. You might not realize it, but at this very moment, several close friends and family members are fist-pumping themselves into muscle spasms after learning that beginning May 14, they can start watching the duck-killing exploits of the Robertson family on Duck Dynasty around the clock.

I'd never miss Duck Dynasty if it involved an all-powerful mallard emperor named Quack Quack.
— Warren Holstein (@WarrenHolstein) January 11, 2015

People who think history isn't bloody enough. If there's one thing that very few people say about World War II, it's that it wasn't quite violent enough for their tastes. Quentin Tarantino is that rare exception, which is why he tweaked reality in order to make his film Inglourious Basterds even more cringe-inducingly gory. Like-minded fans will get to enjoy his end product starting May 22.

Is it 'too much' to carve the Inglourious Basterds logo into my forehead?
— Eli Braden (@EliBraden) October 5, 2011

Who's Sad?

Fans of emotionless killing machines. Unfortunately, they're losing RoboCop on May 1, the newest James Bond film Skyfall on May 5, and The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement on May 3.

If I was a RoboCop, I'd fill my in-thigh gun holster with little notes that had positive affirmations on them
— ILL WELDON (@oldmanweldon) February 18, 2015

Automatic pilots. For one brief moment in time, the world cared about the adventures of non-sentient aircraft navigation systems. Hell, one even got an onscreen BJ. That moment has long-since passed, and Airplane!, the film that made it all possible, is even being wiped away from Netflix on May 1.

If I quote the movie "airplane" and you don't know what im talking about. I'm allowed to punch you in the throat.
— notyourjester (@Loli_Sug) April 12, 2012

Who's Confused?

People who are deeply afraid of reanimated rodents. On the one hand, somebody finally made a movie with them in mind. On their other, they're never going to sleep again once Zombeavers begins streaming on May 19.

When I was 10 I wrote a story about beavers getting rid of hunters. 16 years later I star in #Zombeavers lol! pic.twitter.com/UBKJrzjwPk
— cortney palm (@cortneypalm5) February 16, 2015

Here's a complete list of everything that's arriving and departing from Netflix in May...

Arrivals

May 1
Beyond Clueless
Jimi: All Is by My Side
The Last Waltz
Legally Blonde
Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde
Longmire: Season 3
No No: A Dockumentary
The Prize Winner of Defiance, Ohio
Shameless: Series 10
Underclassman
Witnesses: Season 1

May 2
Lalaloopsy: Festival of Sugary Sweets
LeapFrog Letter Factory Adventures: Amazing Word Explorers

May 3
Anita
D.L. Hughley: Clear
Royal Pains: Season 6

May 5
A Few Best Men

May 6
The Longest Week

May 8
Grace & Frankie
Puss in Boots: Season 1
Tyler Perry's 'A Madea Christmas'

May 9
Jinn
The Liberator

May 12
Extraterrestrial
Fruitvale Station
Magical Universe

May 13
The Identical

May 14
American Restoration
Counting Cars
Dance Moms
Duck Dynasty
Hoarders
Modern Marvels
The Universe

May 15
Anthony Bourdain: Parts Unknown: Season 4
Cyber­Seniors
Dawg Fight
Give Me Shelter
Granite Flats: Season 1-­3

May 16
First Period

May 17
Tinker Bell and the Legend of the NeverBeast

May 19
Before I Disappear
Girlhood
Zombeavers

May 21
Between: Season 1

May 22
H20 Mermaid Adventures
Inglourious Basterds
Jen Kirkman: I'm Gonna Die Alone (And I Feel Fine)
The Other One: The Long, Strange Trip of Bob Weir
Richie Rich: Season 2
Transporter: The Series: Season 1

May 23
Antarctica: A Year on Ice
The Boxtrolls

May 24
Love and Honor
Welcome to the Punch

May 26
Graceland: Seasons 1-­2

May 27
Before I Go to Sleep

May 29
Hot Girls Wanted
Mako Mermaids: Season 3

Departures

May 1
6 Bullets
12 Dogs of Christmas: Great Puppy Rescue
A Knight's Tale
Airplane!
Airplane II: The Sequel
All I Want for Christmas
Along Came Polly
An American Haunting
Baby Genius: The Four Seasons
Baby Genius: Underwater Adventures
BASEketball
Bitter Moon
Boys Don't Cry
Bratz: Babyz: The Movie
Call Me Claus
Call Me Crazy: A Five Film
Cecil B. Demented
Deuces Wild
Devine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood
Fantastic Voyage
Finding Forrester
Friday the 13th: Part 7: The New Blood
Funny Face
Ichi the Killer
Into the Blue 2: The Reef
Life is Beautiful
RoboCop
Romancing the Stone
Sabrina (1954)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze
The Accused
The Brother's Bloom
The Jewel of the Nile
The Secret of NIMN
True Justice: Season 1
Valkyrie

May 2
Flight

May 3
The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement

May 5
Diana Vreeland The Eye Has to Travel
Frank Skinner Stand-Up: Live from Birmingham's National Indoor Arena
Grumpy Old Women Live
Russell Kane: Smokescreens & Castles Live
Skyfall

May 6
1428

May 12
Grimm's Snow White
Robot & Frank

May 13
Fullmetal Alchemist: The Sacred Star of Milos

May 15
Buffalo Girls

May 16
Fun Size

May 17
Cloud 9
Dane Cook: Rough Around the Edges: Live from Madison Square Garden

May 19
Red Dawn (2012)

May 20
No Woman, No Cry

May 23
Silent House

May 28
The New Guy

May 31
The Haunting in Connecticut 2: Ghosts of Georgia

Because as we all know from watching movies, women over 40 are dry, sexless shells that are only believable as grandmothers or comic relief.

Man, I love Inside Amy Schumer. In this new sketch, Amy stumbles upon a decadent picnic with her female acting heroes as they're celebrating Julia Louis-Dreyfus's last day as a f*ckable woman, at least according to the TV and film industry. Like the show's other best sketches, this video pairs smart writing with funny jokes to point out how awful it is that actresses are considered almost useless once they look too old to star in Disney Channel tween shows, but dudes like Al Pacino can keep getting love interests in movies until they've been pronounced legally dead by a coroner.

Incidentally, I think there's a 50% chance that Pacino is already dead, and he's just getting though life via some Weekend at Bernie's-style con.

Congrats, Amy Schumer. You made all the comedy writers in the office jealous and we blogged about most of your episode.

It takes a really big set of something to write a sketch about rape culture, athlete worship, and the beloved Friday Night Lights series. Specifically, a really big set of wine glasses.

Amy Schumer is talented, young, has her own TV show, and gets to make insightful commentary mixed with disgustingly awesome low-brow humor. Did I mention she won a Peabody this weekend? A goddamn Peabody. As infuriating as this might be to the inferiority complexes of people of all genders, races, ages, orientations and creeds, maybe that's why she was able to pull off this tapdance on a minefield.

That goddamn wine glass. Love it.

Czech ex-pat Vit Jedlicka established the Free Republic of Liberland on disputed land between Serbia and Croatia.

Proudly flying the flag.(Via Geek)

It's not every day that a new nation is born, and even less common that it doesn't come about through bloody warfare. This one came about by accident, but its new citizens aren't looking back.

Vit Jedlicka was a member of the Party of Free Citizens in his native Czech Republic. He started talking about founding a new country as a political stunt. He was never serious about it, until the people around him started to be. After a while, he had little choice but to actually go ahead and do it. That's how the Free Republic of Liberland was born.

Home sweet home.(Via Geek)

Jedlicka chose a tiny 7km² plot of land on the west bank of the Danube River to become Liberland. The area is technically a no man's land because it is disputed territory between Serbia and Croatia. The country has a flag, as seen above, as well as a coat of arms and a motto: "To live and let live." So I guess they won't be declaring war anytime soon. Although, if they wanted to, they would have the manpower.

Jedlicka's team of volunteers originally put out a call for 5,000 immigrants to help establish Liberland, but they underestimated how dissatisfied Europeans are with their governments right now. Responding to Jedlicka's claim that no Liberlander would ever be oppressed by the government, more than 160,000 people have applied for citizenship. Volunteers are now combing through the applications to find the candidates who will bring the most to the fledgling nation.

Liberland will need the best of the best to get on its feet, because it's already facing real challenges. It turns out the so-called no man's land it was established on was already claimed by another micronation project: Paraduin. The Paraduinese removed Liberland's flag, and the countries may end up in a real war over this rugged patch of woods. We can only hope they settle it peacefully with a tug-of-war or similar summer camp contest instead of actual fighting. It's bad business for a new country when all of its citizens die immediately.

Tony Stark would have done something more snide.

For about four minutes of this Channel 4 interview with Krishnan Guru-Murthy, Robert Downey Jr. is affable and serious about answering any questions related to Avengers: Age of Ultron. He even takes time to explain why he thinks Age of Ultron is ultimately better than the first movie because- Oh, wait- Mr. "I Read The NY Times Seven Years Ago" wants to ask a serious question about a time we'd all rather not hear about.

Guru-Murthy asks a pointed question about Robert Downey Jr. identifying as a "liberal" after a stint in prison. It's the kind of thing you'd ask if Robert Downey Jr. were promoting a tell-all memoir about how liberal he is, but he's not. He's talking about a movie adapted from a comic book. Bringing up a NY Times article in this context is about as fun as someone pulling out a dreidel at your sixth grade birthday party at the laser tag arena. Give it a rest!

To lighten the mood after Robert Downey Jr. points out his interviewer's visible nervousness, Guru-Murthy then stutters his way through a non-question about past drug use and Robert Downey Sr. This interview tactic is on par with someone on the street asking if people if they "have a minute for the environment" then pushing anyone to the ground who doesn't answer.

The interview is basically over by the end of that question, but Robert Downey Jr. patiently waits for something else to happen before getting to OK to storm out. And if you watch all the way through, you get a tiny glimpse of Tony Stark saying "it's getting a little Diane Sawyer in here and you're kind of a schmuck."

PEOPLE has spoken: Sandy is the Most Beautiful Woman of 2015. Now here's what The People think.

Sandra Bullock is PEOPLE's #MostBeautiful Woman! http://t.co/gzEPFX9apipic.twitter.com/8GxIaLOAl4
— People magazine (@people) April 22, 2015

Today, People magazine declared Sandra Bullock the Most Beautiful Woman of 2015.

She followed Lupita Nyong'o in 2014 and Gwyneth Paltrow in 2013. The choice of Sandy seems totally reasonable to us. She is super pretty. She should definitely win the prettiness contest.

I mean look at her:

Here's why Sandra Bullock definitely deserves @people's "World's Most Beautiful Woman" title: http://t.co/eQgXMCH70I
— Yahoo Style (@YahooStyle) April 22, 2015

So pretty. But there's never any guarantee that people of the Internet, who are notoriously grumpy, will agree with a reasonable pronouncement of beauty.

Some people thought the whole contest was a sham.

Congratulations to Sandra Bullock being named People's Most Beautiful Woman in the World Excluding Every Other Woman Who is Not a Celebrity.
— aaron blitzstein (@BlitznBeans) April 22, 2015

Others had equally arbitrary suggestions for most beautiful women.

I feel like Kerry Washington should've been named most beautiful woman. But I like Sandra bullock.
— ... (@TheeBasketCase_) April 22, 2015

Most people were shocked that Bullock is 50 (and therefore the oldest Most Beautiful Woman yet).

I'll never get over the fact that Sandra Bullock is 50. She looks like 35 or something.
— ℰlle Brody. (@FearingGodzilla) April 22, 2015

when did Sandra bullock turn 50 and how tf does she still look that good
— michigan bitch (@mich_princesss) April 22, 2015

Still others took a more zen "who gives a shit?" approach to the whole thing.

I like Sandra Bullock just fine. She's very lovely and she seems nice. And really, who gives a shit. Honestly.
— modal paradigm guru (@JohnSeaborn) April 22, 2015

And finally, some were wise enough to realize the true meaning of beauty.

The most beautiful woman in the world isn't Sandra Bullock. The most beautiful woman in the world is my wife. (She also reads my tweets.)

— Warren Holstein (@WarrenHolstein) April 22, 2015

I'm happier than the Swedish Chef cooking: They're working on a 'Muppet Show' reboot for adults!

Like many people, my childhood was steeped in Muppets. And while I did watch Sesame Street, Fraggle Rock, and Muppet Babies, my favorite Muppet projects were always the ones that were, despite their G rating, a little aged up — like the original Muppet Movie or the prime-time Muppet Show. Now there's word that ABC is developing a mockumentary-style, "adult" Muppet Show reboot, where we'll see more behind-the-scenes of the show (it's being compared to 30 Rock) and into the Muppets' personal lives. The show hasn't been picked up yet, but ABC is considering a full series order, and I'm all like:

There's no word yet on which specific Muppets the show will focus on, but it's pretty obvious, I think, that there will be a good dose of Kermit, Fozzie, Miss Piggy, and Gonzo. And hopefully these guys:

Sam the Eagle:

And, dare I dream... "Pigs in Space"?

I hope that the reboot also keeps the original Muppet Show's tradition of bringing on guest stars. The classic show didn't just have great antics from Jim Henson, Frank Oz, and the rest of the Muppet crew, it also had great late 70s and early 80s performers hosting and doing bits with the Muppets. Like Steve Martin:

Or Alice Cooper, surrounded by monster Muppets:

Or Gilda Radner and a giant carrot:

Or Elton John and his talking lunch (he plays "Crocodile Rock" around two minutes in):

The Muppets have done more "adult" entertainment before, too — there was a series of reoccurring sketches on the first season of Saturday Night Live, known as "The Land of Gorch." The sketches were not well-received, though, and ceased after the first season of the show. The fact that NBC has one Land of Gorch sketch online under the heading "Dregs and Vestiges," which I'm pretty sure is a synonym for "We really love this and definitely want you to watch it."

Ono made the comment backstage at Starr's induction ceremony to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

Ono she didn't!(Getty)

There were plenty of shockers at Ringo Starr's induction ceremony to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame ceremony on Saturday. For one, Ringo was actually inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame! Burn.

Ringo is the last of the Beatles to be inducted for his solo career, and many are saying it's long overdue. One thing's for sure: it didn't come easy. Ringo's fellow bandmate Paul McCartney was there to support him, as was John Lennon's widow Yoko Ono. And what Yoko had to say backstage really made an impression. She told Rolling Stone:

"No one is probably going to believe it, but he was the most influential Beatle."

She's right, we don't believe it. Yoko explained that Ringo's even-tempered, kind personality made him more enduringly popular than her late husband with his mercurial personality.

"John would go up and down and all that, but Ringo was always just very gentle. And he really believed in peace and love."

"I do believe in those things! Thanks 'Ko!"(Getty)

It seems like Ringo has a superfan. And while it's easy to roll your eyes at her comments (Ringo was never as popular as John at his most dickish), it's true that he's long been underappreciated. Not only was his expert drumbeat a very important part of the success of the Beatles, his personality and low-key charisma were too. Just look at how well he sells this scene from A Hard Day's Night:

Yoko seemed delighted to welcome Ringo into the Hall of Fame. She only had one regret:

"It would have been better if George and John were here, too."

Amen, Yoko.

Excuse me, the greeting is up here.

You may have been distracted by something in that video, but yes. It's true. You can now pay the small amount of $9.99 and have a real life human being deliver a message in the exact spot you're staring at anyway.

It's called Tittygram.com, and it marks the end of civilization as we know it. If you thought Twitter had ruined everyone's attention span, just wait until you hear that you may only use a max of 35 characters with this service. That's exactly 1/4 of what you could do with a tweet. Except there are also boobs distracting you. Seems like the character limit should vary more depending on how much room there is to write.

So, congratulations to the Moscow-based company for figuring out a way to sort of save print media. But, also, to probably destroy it. Along with a lot of people's self-respect. Including the company Burger King, which has already used the service to promote their business with the message: "I love Burger King."

Heads up: it's shaped like a human skull.

Important news*** Skull-shaped crisp found in packet of cheese and onion http://t.co/bsninEyYbbpic.twitter.com/Hjj1WzBiPu
— Daily Mail U.K. (@DailyMailUK) April 22, 2015

There you are. Enjoying your favorite potato chip at lunch, and thinking of all you could do if you had just a little more spare time. You look down, and staring right back at you is the realization you will one day perish.

From now on, I'm only eating food shaped like happy things, like these pancakes that look like Mickey Mouse. Oh no. The pancakes look sort of like two planets being swallowed by a supernova, something that will one day happen to Earth. There is no escape.

Be well, my friends.