The weirdest brand imaginable tried to commemorate 9/11 today.
Seems more like they're remembering the twin tubes. Look, I don't want to tell the fine people who make Fleshlight that they have no right to remember 9/11. Their founder patented the device as a...
View ArticleA college student got stuck in a garbage can and had to be rescued by firemen.
College kid gets trashed.University of Manchester student Robert Niven had to be rescued by firemen after getting himself stuck inside a garbage can. The young Brit was on his way home from a "night...
View Article5 Things You Should At Least Pretend To Know Today - September 11, 2014
1. Oscar Pistorius Found Not Guilty Of Murder — Might Still Be Guilty Of Being Dangerously Dumb Olympic runner Oscar Pistorius has been found not guilty by a South African judge of murdering his...
View ArticleBow down to your newest god: a tiny kid.
Turns out God really does care about football outcomes. What makes you special? Is it that you are a supreme being, the creator and ruler of the universe and source of all moral authority? No? Then...
View ArticleLocal news team terrorized by bat in the studio.
Bo Williams, center, knows this is his big chance to look anchorly. Local news anchors have to deal with a lot: reporting on traffic jams, reporting on funny animal stories, and each other. Intrepid...
View ArticleThe city of Valley Park is surprisingly casual about court appearances.
Rules 3-39 don't really matter, apparently, and #40 is a secret.People who are willing to serve their city government should be commended, but no one has ever accused their municipal employees of being...
View ArticleMan on trial gives prosecutor "the look" when she reads his amazing pickup...
"I'm guilty of loving too much"This man on season 18 of MSNBC's Lockup might be on trial for attempting to sell weed to an undercover cop, but he still stands behind his convictions. Turns out he...
View ArticleIf you take the music out of "Star Wars," things get pretty weird pretty fast.
A bunch of creepsters standing around being creepy.It turns out that if you strip all of John Williams' classic score away from the original Star Wars film, you end up losing a good deal—if not all—of...
View ArticleFoo Fighters played a secret show last night and were joined by a Foo...
Foo times two.It's no secret that Foo Fighters have been playing secret gigs lately under the name The Holy Shits. So when the terribly kept secret got out that the Holy Shits were playing a Brighton,...
View ArticleHigh school senior creates petition to include his cat and some lasers in his...
This was all the cat's idea.Out there, in the wilds of Schenectady, there is a kid who is fighting the good fight: the agonizing oppression of the student yearbook. Every year, kids are forced to take...
View ArticleNASCAR fan gets too close to track taking photo, gets blown back by wind from...
What's even more amazing is there was a black guy at a NASCAR race.If there's one thing I know about NASCAR, and I doubt that I know two things, it's that you don't really want to get that close to the...
View ArticleSarah Palin and her family reportedly got into a drunken brawl in Alaska over...
Do you know who she is?! Do you know who she is?!It's always difficult when our most cherished and respected public figures get caught up in the baser skirmishes of everyday life. Of course we like to...
View ArticleThis bear cub dancing with a flagstick is way more exciting than actual golf.
A paw four.Regardless of what it says in the golf rule book, or the pace you're playing at, when a family of bears decides to play through, you should give them the right of way. Better yet, you should...
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